Please someone tell me this gets easier.
After my crash things have gotten worse. I’m going to lose my job soon, and most likely my girlfriend who I planned to marry mid next year.
I feel my second crash is one I’m just not coming back from. I’m breaking down everyday. I go to work, put on a brave face, everyone thinks I’m tired or sick. I brush it off as just a “bit tired” (which is a no no in my line of work). I see my gf for a bit after, trying my best to put on a happy and excited face when I feel absolutely nothing. Dead inside. No libido. No motivation. No drive. Just my head ripping apart from the inside out.
I then get home, close my door, and break down.
Everyday for the past two weeks since my second crash.
I’m losing my mind. Panic attacks, depression, anhedonia and impotence. After just one pill. My one recovery for nearly a month gave me hope until I totally crashed again 2 weeks ago. I didn’t know it was possible to experience pain like this.
Please someone tell me it gets easier. Or that a recovery could happen. My hormones are normal so I know it’s full-blown pfs. I’m so alone right now in this pain. I’m taking bupriopion each day, but it doesn’t do much.
I feel like ending it everyday. Please someone help.