I can’t imagine that you suffer 22 years on accutane problems. I hope most of the time as milder case than now? Im done after two years pfs already.
What makes me really sick, the Roche family, who destroyed so uncountable childrens lifes, lives a privileged billionairs life and never ever mouth an apology to their victims!
This faces should inspire our will to fight forever!
Guys I’m so bad. This condition is crushing me. After some wild ups and downs I’ve come crashing down again. For a while there I felt kinda good. Not like myself bit more with it and sharp. I could think clearer but it was like it wasn’t me. I can’t explain I had more energy but felt not really like myself at all. More indifferent . More motivation but still feeling totally off. Now tho over the past week and a half a crash had been setting in . I noticed I was getting super super fatigued brain fog getting worse. Anxiety returning
Ti itus screaming. Gradually its chaiiped away to where I’m.back spending all day in bed. I CAn NOT put my phone down. I am constantly scrolling and opening and closing apps like OCD. I am so lonely and the depression and inadequacy are all too real. Im 38 and realizing now how bad my life is truly going to be with this. Who can ever date me? Derealization is screaming. My skin my body. My poor body. Skin is utterly destroyed all over. I stink like battery acid. Guys I’m going downhill fast. I know those days where I felt okay were going to be met with a vigirous punishment. A deep depression and anhedonia are setting in. The song that made.me.cry even a month ago does nothing to me.now. I’m feeling switched off and in pain. How in the fuck am.i supposed to carry on? I don’t feel human. No connection to the world around me. I look like absolute shit. I’m really slipping now
We’re here, brother. Reach out if you need to talk.
My dude that’s awful and I’m so sorry youre suffering this
I know it’s hell
But you must ride the storm and rest as much as you can
I had the same thing exactly years ago and I was terrified of the idea of not getting back
Compete derealization
No emotion
No sleep
But a month later I got through it
Stay strong brother
We are here for you
This is a temporary storm
I’m totally fucked. I’m like a zombie. I went from feeling very much not like myself but had energy to.now I feel absolutely shut off and I can barely keep eyes open
Like under extremely heavy sedation and I’m derealized out of my mind
The nightmare never ends. Iam mentally demented I have nothing to say to my friends . My best friend was over and I was acting so weird and detatched and out of it she said she had to leave. I know it is because vibe is so bad
This is hell. I feel like a junkie nodding off here in the library right now. Injist want to go home.and lay in bed and that’s what I will do.now.
I’m so sorry dude
You will bounce back soon enough
It may take a bit of time
Was it anything in particular that set this recent bad stint off?
If you told I apologize I didn’t see and asking you to repeat it
Nothing set it off I did nothing different. This is the crash setting in that I knew was coming and its setting in deep. This is a nightmare I am on derealization acid trip from hell.
What are we when not connected to out memories? I can’t remember anything. Literally Zero connection to myself or the world around me. I am far back deep in hell after being okay for a little.bit. my body and mind are buzzing with derealization and visual snow. Tinnitus screaming
Iam so mentally destroyed. God fucking damn it all.
I swear man this disease wants me dead. I can’t believe people can feel like this
Im so bad
The hell has no bottom. There is no bottom. I’m only falling further and further into a nightmare I never could have imagined.
My dude you’re gonna have to see someone and get some kind of blood panel
Ya can’t suffer with this alone
Have you looked up and PFS doctors around you?
Or get on a Skype call and work with one of them
There’s gotta be something you can do in the meantime to take the edge off
If it’s as bad as you describe I’d be trying all nuclear options like TRT and such
I only see the frantic faces of the roche family. They are the evils faces sucking thousands little childs lives. A normal murderer goes to jail. A pharma cartel family stands over the law, politics and ethics.
Tried trt gel it blew me apart and that was years ago. My body can’t handle androgens being touched or it violently reacts. I’m pretty stuck. Luckily I had somewhat of a sleep last night woke up 4 times but got something in.
I need help yes. On the list for cheap therapist for 5 months now. Also Need a full blood panel done and gut biome. Hundreds of dollars i don’t have tho
They are too powerful to touch. They will never face penalty for the lives they have ruined
Kenneth Kaufman and Roy Vagelos, who well knowning the evil tortures caused by them and started the finasteride apocalypse, look like normale people. No one could measure that they still driven by evil energy. But the Roche family are the fiends spitting image and they let them go!
I’m homebond. Sit in my chair. Look at the wall day in day out. Manus story on Moral Medicine.
I’m
Concerned about me being androgen sensitive too
I do TRT years ago and was totally fine
But that was back when food didn’t bother me
Nothing
Now the wrong food can fuck me up so I’m cautious about androgens
I kinda wanted to start the t gel
Your sleeping is a good sign
Perhaps it’s the turn of good things and healing pal!
Inused th t gel a half smear and it fucked me up good. But thats me I am a very very bad case
My sleeping pill no longer works. At all. Not eve a hint . I am an absolute fuckning wreck of a human. I can not believe I uave deteriorated this poorly. My disgusting mushy skin flops over my pants I’m.constantly in pain and swollen. I can not related to anyone or anything . I am ashamed of my body and appearance.I look absolutely disgusting with my clothes off. My skin is horrid and mushy and fasting does nothing. my penis a chewed peice of gum. I am so delrealized and depressed and lost. I CaNT FUCKING THINK. NO HUMOUR NO PERSONALITY. This diseases strips you of so much you don’t even understand.
Even a few weeks ago I was doing okay. Bad but not like this. Now I can’t even deal I so just want to give up
For those of you who don’t have it this bad I beg you to please not jeopardize what you have. I was bad but I’m like a different person now
Blah blah blah ill shut up. No where to vent. No one who understands I’m alone except for my dad who lives in Toronto.
I’m.not all doom and gloom pserionally but I have experienced things of such horror only a small handful of people who have ever existed would even be able to relate. Like my mind and body feel dead . Minority of a minority of a minority of someone who was once human
You have the right to vent. It is a very very severe disease and many feel bad and totally bad. And many are housebond, totally lonesome and even bedbound. Yes there seem to be some spontaneous recoveries in the first two years, but there are so much infantilism too, who think, if they deny it and tell about fake recoveries and fake protocols, the syndrom will not exist anymore.
And the serious cases like me and you and many other old fellows here have to excuse themselves for a bad state, awarness and research boycotted and activists like me have to consult layers and law enforcement agencies to protect against pro pfs stalkers, it’s important to fight for patients rights here to speak out how you feel. And that it is not fine what Accutane did to your life.
I feel with you. I lost so many friends and social connections. Only daily helpers for a care level three patient help me to survive here in my house. And there are others good friends meanwhile sitting in their chairs derealized and depressed. We all have the right to vent. Maybe good to sprak out in a podcast, to show how severe the post accutane syndrom is, to get more awareness.
Still here freinds. Still fighting Still wasting away. Very crashed right now and have a newish symptom unlike I’ve had before. I’ve deal with constipation and diarrhea but never constipation at this level. My stool is literally like hard rocks. Pebbles and fragments that sink to the bottom. It will not come out of me either ad my asshole has sealed up and is a swollen feeling. This ain’t good. Will be buying an enema . But ya still here suffering daily:)
I understand you, its totally evil what this drug have done to us. For me it’s only surviving, no life
I keep crashing. Can hardly get out of bed these days feel so beaten down.
My memory and brain is like someone with dementia. Everything is a fog. I scroll my phone all day in bed. Digestion is shutting down big time. I used to take giant hearty poops if i ate certain foods now it’s like rocks squeezing through a hose the past few weeks. I feel awful.
But most of all right now I’m lonely. I need a woman bad. But feel I’m so far gone in every way it won’t happen again. Even when I was bad years ago I had some girls who wanted to date me but now its like any sexual attraction I had has vaporized. Women don’t view me that way. I don’t view myself that way. I crash bad now when I cum. I just leave my dick alone or masturbate a bit but never finish. It doesn’t feel that good anyway when u can actually get an erection.
How will i ever date again?
Hey im on disability have no money no job cant eat anything will be bed bound if we have sex my memoery and mind are terrible my skin is turning to mush and I’m in a constant state of existential crisis and suicidal ideation. What about you?
Fuck .
I know this pails in comparison to my actual physical symptoms but it’s been really weighing on me lately. Anyway ya still fighting for some reason. Don’t know what to do next.
Maybe I’ll try eating just meat and black beans and see what happens
Idk
My digestion is fucking destroyed. Whatever I can pass is like curled hard macaroni and I can feel my intestines are hard. I’ve taken 4 enemas now and out still feels like I’m stuffed with shit. This is bad fuckn news.
Also I love the conflicting treatments. I read I need to eat more fiber so I ate a whole can of black beans and some steel cut oats. Today I read to avoid fiber at all costs because it clumps up and makes the blockage worse.
My intestines are for sure partially blocked at least. I press my stomach and can feel how hard it is in there. Wtf do I do now.
I swear man. Never . Fucking. Ends
