@HopefulRecovery Thanks man and definitely. I won’t go out without a fight. You only get one life.
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and that one life is riddled with severe pfs, what a gift…
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Update 11/10/2025
I finished my five sessions of shockwave therapy. I had the first full erection with thoughts since before I crashed off finasteride in early July 2025.
Overall the penile pain has gone away finally.
Going to be trying the following therapeutic efforts in the following months.
Memantine 10 MG for obsessive-compulsive disorder and general anxiety.
Bipolar Androgen Therapy & Potent HDACi for PFS symptoms
9-Me-BC for ADHD/Anhedonia
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Upon further inspection of the paperwork… I have a corporo-venous leak. If I’m being honest, I’m just so tired of this. It’s one issue after the other. It’s constant torture that is unimaginable to deal with this. I haven’t felt joy since mid August 2025.
Besides anhedonia and anxiety, not being believed by people you used to consider “friends” is revealing. It separates the real from the fake. I’m glad my family at least believes me.
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the believe it but since they can’t even being to fathom what it’s actually like to suffer this horribly it’s kinda pointless. if only they at least understood the depths of our suffering it would help
@LifeSucksBalls It’s a level of human suffering I didn’t think existed. Truly just survival and no quality of life.
Update 11/17/2025
I took 2.5 mg oral Cialis two days ago and I bet you can guess what symptom I gained… Tinnitus woohoooo!
Current Symptoms - Anhedonia, Anxiety, Depression, 24/7 Suicidal Thoughts, Sadness, Tinnitus, Venous Leak, Fibrosis, Loss Of Fullness When Erect, Penis Swaying To The Left, Penile Scarring, Loss Of Morning Erections, Loss of Nighttime Erections, Damaged Internal Penile Tissue, Mild Libido, Mild ED (Can Only Get 3/4 Erections That Stand Up When Standing Up), Weight Accumulation In The Waist (Feminization), Dry Brittle Hair, Genital Numbness, Premature Ejaculation/Hypersensitivity (From The Few Upper Glands That Are Not Numb), Loss Of Spontaneous Erections, Loss Of Sense Time, Cracking Joints/Bones, Slight Neuropathy (In My Fingers), Zero Confidence/Androgenic Aggression.
I didn’t mean to type this all out in that pretentious way capitalizing every single word but I’m so exhausted I don’t feel like revising it.
I decided to sit down and document every single symptom, some came at different times most notably my Wellbutrin induced anhedonia, the neuropathy and bone/joint cracks came from either hydroxide or eating a lot of sugar in early September. It’s important to note I don’t have any gut issues and haven’t experienced something like that again. The loss of sense of time and dry brittle hair began before finasteride and were caused by chronic stress and an episode of depression.
For some good news, the Mematine seems to be helping with OCD at 5 MG at nighttime which will titrate up to a higher dose and twice a day at some point. The thing with OCD though is it’s usually rooted in stuff out of reality. In this case, the obsessions/instrusive thoughts are rooted in reality as the PFS/anhedonia I’m suffering from is indeed real.
I sometimes think how this could be of have been prevented and how a $45 prescription of 1 MG oral finasteride ruined my fcking life. I haven’t felt joy since mid August and often daydream of my previous life.
11/20/2025
I’ve crashed myself into further hell and now I’m really considering ending it from BAT.
I have full blown emotional blunting - blank mind, worsened anhedonia, no anxiety, and no depression, no inner monologue, and no visualization.
While the relief from anxiety is nice I feel more dead inside. This is almost like PSSD victims who get blunted severely.
No reaction to porn after months of finally gaining that down the drain.
guys, there is no supplement on earth that can fix pfs, by taking a bunch of shit, doing experiments etc you will only further fuck yourself up
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11/26/2025
I’ve been taking the Memantine and will eventually be titrated up to 10 MG x 2 (once rising, once in the evening). This has assisted in relieving the anxiety.
I’ll be starting 250 UIs of hCG triweekly following what @Joekool did next week. I achieved a prescription from Dr. Irwin Goldstein.
I have scratched off doing BAT as I honestly do not think that is a viable option anymore. Some of the fatigue has gone away since that disaster. Sexual function is slowly returning to baseline.
12/1/2025
I have some unfortunate news to share. I will be ending my life this Christmas. I have finally come to this conclusion after realizing I cannot reverse the venous leak and the penile tissue damages. It’s impossible to reach pre-PFS state.
I always told myself that if I couldn’t achieve this I would die. This will most likely be my final post.
Please don’t do that. I know it’s hard but you gotta keep going. Please.
I don’t know much regarding venous leaks, but I remember reading in the r/FinasterideSyndrone subreddit that Dopplers can show a false positive and there are stories of people who were diagnosed with it and then their erections returned later. I don’t know what other penile damage you have but there are also accounts of shrinkage and other issues reversing.
Please give it more time. I know PFS is awful to endure, and any amount of time with it can feel like things aren’t worth continuing, but you are still relatively early in it at 6 months. There are accounts of people who improve at the 1 year mark, or later.
If you can, try to focus on other aspects of your life which will give more time for your body to hopefully improve.
@Manofthenight @HopefulRecovery Appreciate the responses. By Christmas it will almost be a month of hCG. I’ll make judgement from there. The PFS gulag is hell on earth. The anhedonia/emotional blunting and perma dick damage is making my SI reach unhealthy levels.
12/5/2025 Update
After two doses of hCG, I’m noticing some morning erections and emissions. If this works to any extent I’ll be pleased. I continue to take Memantine which has had no adverse effects.
The Board of Medicine in the state I live in got back to me about the complaint I filled against the dermatologist who prescribed me this poison. I’m not sure what good will come from this but if she never prescribes it to anyone else again I consider that a win.
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12/20/2025 Update
Fortunately due to my severe anhedonia and emotional blunting my biological inhibition to stay alive has gone out the window. I’ll say if these were not present I’d stay around longer but fuck that. My condition is permanent. Side note - hCG is a massive cope and does not work for PFS. JoeKool used several stuff before “recovering” with hCG.
It’s really sickening how pharma can permanently ruin your life and you are left to finish the job. I wish I just died off my first dosing in late May 2025. I really hope some day they get to the bottom of this mess. Last update, sorry everyone.
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1/1/2026
Can’t believe it’s 2026. I’ve dropped hCG. 2026 is the year I’m a recovery story. DHT-E and E2 are what I’ll be trying. I may add in Sodium Valproate ER and Tideglusib if needed. I’ll never surrender to this disease.