I tried that. I begged him to let me get better but i think if theres a god he chose to punish me.
Irl im so alone no one understands they treat me like i have a common cold ffs. They don’t have any sympathy. I’m tempted to write on my suicide note that they should blame themselves honestly
My family removed me from my house because apparently being upset about PFS is unacceptable… Wonder if they’d think that if it was cancer or some shit -.- I haven’t seen my dog in a month. I miss him so much and he’s never gonna see me again its so sad it breaks my heart it brings tears to my eyes as i type
He will be fine with my family.
With PFS it is hard to think rationally. Is there anyone in your family and/or friend circle that you can turn to right now? I’d suspect doing meth would have to stop as a first step for them. Do this for your dog. To see him again. If that is the only thing you fight for, fight for him. Has your family read anything about PFS? Have they been on here?
They say people on the forums are the ones who don’t get better and everyone who gets better doesn’t use the forums -.- They’re crackpots they don’t understand that this isn’t something that people just get better from.
They have to be reminded I fuckign stopped them a month ago. I have friends but they have their own lives to worry about they can’t be sitting their counselling me. They’ll be devastated, but at least I know they’ll defend my legacy.
I know the feeling. Unfortunally nobody that havent been hit by this coulde really understand us and that make it even harder to live with. I dont think God is puneshing you or me. We are just living in a fallen world. God now all youre struggel and he have compassion for you and If you turn to him he will give you strengh and peace in the mist of youre agony.
Your friends, your close friends, will want to be there for you. Give them the chance to be. Give yourself at least three months off of this. You are at the worst point right now. I know it is horrible. Please do not lose hope.
Why would god take my empathy? I used to be so lovely to everyone and everything, I think its because i complained saying i care too much about people/animals suffering around the world so he took it from me…
Idk i don’t really believe in a god but if there is one he can certainly be cruel either that or theres a heaven waiting and it’ll all have been justified imo
I’ll see soon enough (or not since i wont be able to comprehend im dead)
I dont like being this new ‘fake’ me around my friends. They know the bubbly old me the empathetic happy always talking motormouth none stop talking bout his interests me…
Now Im faking every interaction with them… Its horrible
Hello mate, reading your posts is quite worrying. Most of us can relate to what you saying and the resulting actions its bringing out. PFS effects so many things. I’ve had personal contact with a few guys who were where you are right now. Attempting suicide even. They too didn’t believe they’d recover or last 3 months. Not only did they all last but they also all improved to different degrees. So hang on in there and stay off the meth, try clean living read some books go outside try to do some of the things you once enjoyed. You’ve got to try to chill and wait out the clock. Believe that you’ll get a lot of your life back. It will happen.
Thats all I hear nowadays. I’ll get better. But I’ll never be the same… I don’t think the empathetic old me is ever coming back is he? No one can confirm their emotions came back fully.
I can’t do it man, I can’t wait to see if I have a shot at living or not. I just think about suicide constantly everytime i see a tall building i think could i get up there and jump. Its just fucked dude…
i deserve this for not being grateful for what i had. the only way my family will understand how devastating this is, is when im finally dead which is sad. They keep saying ‘dont read horror stories’…
I AM THE HORROR STORY. 
I think about suicide every day but carrying it out is very different. Our allopregenolone imbalance brings on the particular side. Try to be objective and see that this is an inappropriate emotional response to an chemical imbalance. Some of the guys have improved in terms of emotions. Negativity is another common side While there is life there is hope. Don’t give up on you especially so early. This is irrational PFS and not you
The very day I took the first fin pill I layed in bed and thought huh dying wouldn’t actually be that bad.
Before then I was terrified of death, existential crises constantly. It definitely changes something there that makes us suicide prone. Didn’t even realise it was PFS at that point.
Listen, its absolutely necessary for You to slow down. You have no idea what all positive and improving can happen within like a first year - even with time alone doing nothing - good things indeed. You have to let Your body and all systems a chance to rebalance and at the same time fully recreate from the basics Your current 300 km/h doomed mindset. Its essential. You wont be able to do a single thing out of Your grave, there is no way back out of there - but there are ways to get out of PFS. But being physically alive is a must here. Lets stick to strictly time now since You barely recently stopped fin. Again, give it at least a proper time opportunity now without any interventions first year. This can be backed up by MANY sufferers that its essential and may bring substantial improvements, even recovery. This is not Your end time, neither anytime soon, so please dont hurry there with Your engagement. Please, slow down. At least a full year is necessary speaking of time improving-recovering. I wish You much needed patience and strength
Dude, dont you freaking dare do anything to yourself before we test everyhing that may have potential to become better?..You dont want to live like that…Neither do i…But dont f*cking waste your life just like that without even trying…You have nothing to lose…You can always kill yourself later…Trying something before you kill yourself is a Win-Win situation…You owe it to yourself…(To hell with all friends and family. They dont understand shit)…You owe it to us…To try and find a treatment instead of just killing yourself is your task, exactly like mine…I dont want to live like this forever…But i wont go, before doing my part of trying and finding a solution…Just brace yourself now, and wait till this depression, and anxiety lessen in severity (And they will, i promise you that, i have been there myself), and then you can have some free mind, to try some of the possible treatments, that are out there…Just wait now!!
No, you won’t be the same, but you can do this. It doesn’t mean you won’t have a fulfilling and valuable life with PFS. My partner was suicidal a lot when I first met him. His PFS is still there, but he is able to feel things much more than before. <3
You have PFS. Your body is damaged from an unnatural substance… It is going to require diligence and a healthy lifestyle over time to start healing and kicking things back in order, even if it is minimal improvements.
Why are you using drugs like meth?
Take it from somebody who has wrestled with symptoms and struggles across the board from this shit. You’ve gotta get control over your own mind before anything else happens. Go for long walks in the sunlight. Take your shirt off. Go for a jog. Get out of your head and start tapping into your own body and evaluate how it makes you feel. And then do it over and over again, even when you don’t see progress.
And if you’re into rap music, take a listen through NF’s albums.
Dude I’m right with you and I’ve had this 2 years. And it hasn’t gotten easier, Just missed out on my last best years of life. I have a (hopefully) peaceful suicide method ready to go. 2020 is my last years and I’m so glad. Can’t take this torture anymore.
Forgive me if this is a stupid question man but who’s NF? I’ve only recently got into rap music and it’s really growing on me.
well you didn’t acknowledge anything I typed to you so alright.