Go look into what delusions and hallucinations are… Also maybe practise a little more compassion? I already feel like shit I know I’m a piece of shit drug taker who should’ve probably succeeded because honestly living just gives me the chance to fuck everyone’s head more no? (Yeah I still hate myself for using drugs no one is gonna be proud of that) But that still doesn’t change that I fucked up by writing the post (concerning so many people when I should have never been considering suicide in the first place)
I still feel guilty for writing it I know I’ve pissed people off and made them worried I know I’m failing to amend. That’s all I wanted to do amend I couldn’t take it anymore I was avoiding thr forum initially after getting sectioned cus I was tending to others I had concerned a lot.
Now I guess Imjust trying to do my best through all of this and I know my best is shit and I know its not enough and I guess even now I still look like a piece of shit to.some of you which is sad but it’s to be expected it’s all my fault I hold no I’ll will on those people I hold the I’ll will on myself
Plus do you not think even if I didn’t post on a forum I wouldn’t hold this ill will on myself and look at my self as a piece of shit for breaking down to my mom and friends before getting sectioned either way? Because I kinda do lol I told everyone I was gonna suicide and my friends didn’t know where I was I had been telling me friends for weeks how I felt so it hasn’t been easy on the people around me. I’ve been holding a lot of guilt about everything lately I just put the pfs forum to the back of my mind at first and have regrets about doing that now because its led people to worry longer than need be. I need to focus on the future more though and be more forgiving to myself even though it’s hard and yes sometimes I can get a little dreary and self hate but that’s just life I don’t think that’s a good idea to permanently avoid the forum because that happens abyway
Now bed time for me I’m feeling sleepy 