So no real tips I don’t think. When it gets bad is when I go for my long runs and I would say sometimes that actually seems to make it feel somewhat worse during the run, but then afterwards it seems to feel better. Something for you to try at least.
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Had been steady uphill this month very slowly and I was feeling very good, but I believe I am now entering a crash. I’ve been sleeping less and less each night lately and had a not great day 2 days ago. Tonight I felt the familiar fight or flight and thought I would not be able to sleep. However I did fall asleep easily, but only got 4-5 hours. I think I’m getting sick also, so this may be contributing. Other than feeling tired though, it’s not too bad, just hope the rebound starts today. It had been a good month for me up until a few days ago, hoping to finish the month strong.
Holy hell I just read this entire thread. Hang in there man. I’m about half your age. Did you ever find anything that would help with anhedonia? I developed anhedonia when I took Wellbutrin back in August which was the second worst mistake in life after taking finasteride.
That’s quite the read if you went through the whole thread! All I’ve found is in this thread and while I have largely recovered from anhedonia, I don’t know if anything I did helped me recover. All I can say is to try the things I tried and see if it helps you. The only thing is, it took me a very long time, so it would not be a quick fix regardless.
I’ve said this a few times throughout the thread. Unfortunately with PFS, there is currently no magic quick fix.
I see what you mean and yeah unfortunately that’s the case. I’m not gonna give up fighting PFS.
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That’s great, don’t quit fighting. If you have any questions about anything you think I can help with, message me anytime.
Thanks man. I definitely will. I’m posting an update to my situation today. Things have unfortunately only slightly improved and sort of plateaued.
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Slight improvement is great! If things are moving at all it’s encouraging in my mind.
52 months post fin - end of month update:
This month has been a little up and down, but overall a good one, and I’m ending on the best note yet since post-fin, so there’s hope this next month will be amazing. I had the one crash and have been up and down with anxiety, but my body is going through something and I’m currently feeling better than I’ve felt so far. I also feel reasonably stable.
Something I need to record, but is so hard to explain is that I’m having feelings that I haven’t had in so long. My entire thought processes feel different and more “normal”. Also, little things like I’m smelling things I haven’t smelled in a while, it’s just really, really hard to put into words. I can feel emotional effects of music returning too. I just generally feel “different”, and I think different is good.
More tangible changes are that libido is back and I smell SO bad. My body odor is back full force, so much so my wife is staying clear of me. I haven’t had to wear deodorant in so long, so this is an adjustment. I also slept 8.5 hours last night, and deeper than normal too as my wife getting up usually disturbs me, but not last night. I am optimistic, happy, sociable, anxiety free and just generally thinking clearly.
Downsides are that I feel like my nervous system is going nuts. I have the brain burning, but no longer just in my brain. Different parts of my body are lighting up with this weird tingling sensation. I have SEVERE calf cramps that hurt SO bad. I had these while I was still taking fin, that’s when they started.
Here’s the really weird one though. I also woke up at 4 AM 3 days ago with the worst back pain I’ve ever had and I’ve had chronic back pain and periodic spasm episodes for the past 15-16 years. The back pain and spasms were so intense I could not move, could not sit, stand or walk. Over these past 2 days I have recovered, although my back is still weak. It’s just a little tender and harder to sit down and stand up without something to put my weight on. Now here’s the weird part. I have had chronic pain 24/7 for the past 15 years. There is never a time when my back doesn’t hurt. It has not hurt since the recovery. I’m pain free. Fucking weird, but I’ll take it.
Starting the clock again, we’ll see how long this lasts.
Did not last long, now experiencing dizziness which is something I haven’t had before, along with other things like increased feelings of hunger, and extreme fatigue. Then the normal culprits like anxiety and fractured sleep.
Doing ok, but just a little freaked out by all the new things that are suddenly going on.
So, I’m now having some pretty significant sleep dysfunction to go along with everything else, plus my back problems are back. Also some mild anxiety and just a very noticeable mood drop and mild loss in interest in things. I’m also having muscle twitches, that are mild. I’m still doing ok, but this is definitely a crash. I went to go to sleep and just noticed I was having trouble, which is unusual these days. I did finally sleep, but am now wide awake 3 hours later with the familiar wired feeling.
I am currently of two mindsets. I believe this to just be a regular crash coinciding with my sudden upswing this much. I have a well documented history of crashes right after I fly too close to the sun and things are good.
My second mindset wonders if I’m reacting to the ibuprofen I took. I never take ANY medicine, but this back thing was bad. I took ibuprofen as I had taken one before with no issue, but I took 6 first day, like 4 next day and then maybe 2 more after? I took ibuprofen as I was terrified of the medicine my doctor prescribed (Prednisone and a stronger antiinflammatory). I am semi-afraid that caused the crash. However, I’ve been here before, I always freak out, and I always recover. So, I’m trying really hard to calm down and just take the wait and see approach. If this is a regular crash, the fact this is my mindset shows progress imo.
I took ibuprofen for pain in one foot (most likely unrelated to PFS) in mid/late June and I don’t think it had any adverse effect on me. I did have the famous first crash around July 4th but ibuprofen most likely had nothing to do with it.
Seems to be a normal crash. Two days ago, had a day where I simply couldn’t fall asleep. However, it wasn’t nearly as bad as other days where this occurred in the past and I did finally fall asleep around 5AM and slept normally until the morning. That day, yesterday and today were pretty shitty, but been getting progressively more sleep each night after and tonight I finally feel good again, so after 10 days I’m back on the upswing again. Fingers crossed that it lasts.
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I did catch COVID, about 1.5 years ago. I remember because it was on my 40th bday. It hit me pretty hard, but thankfully seemingly no long-term effects.
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53 months post fin:
In summary, a good month. Symptoms this month were very mild, and the peaks were very good. Symptoms I had this month were as follows:
- Headaches
- Mild anxiety from time to time
- Significant vision problems beyond what has been experienced to this point. One day everything seemed “squished” vertically which was unsettling. Other days my vision is just very blurry or poor.
- Muscle twitches
- Return of chronic back/neck pain
- Urinary retention (was pretty bad for about 1 week)
- Joint pain/stiffness
- Muscle soreness
On the positive side:
- Thoughts are very clear
- Sleep seems to have now progressed to 6.75 hours straight before wake up . More can be obtained afterwards sometimes, but I always wake up at this point.
- Some aggression and drive consistently present
- Libido more consistently present
- Desire to stay up late as I want to do things is returning. My drive to want to do things has now exceeded my desire for a 100% good night’s sleep.
On the weird side:
- Nasal swelling is consistently returned. I can’t breath out of my left nostril at all typically. This was normal for me pre-fin, but went away during PFS.
- HIGHLY fluctuating body odor
Edit: Had significant anxiety spike today, and currently cannot sleep at 4am. Fell asleep multiple times but had hypnic jerks and immediately woke up multiple times. I haven’t had these for years. The last time I had these was leading up to my initial crash (which is terrifying). I’m also having some mile hot/cold flashes. I’m doing ok, just trying to deal with it until it passes.
Edit2: Similar to before I fell asleep finally around 4-5 and had low quality sleep with a lot of wake ups, but did at least get some sleep.
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Have had SIGNIFICANT anxiety on and off since the sleep crash. Mild brain burning is back.
Also, forgot to mention I’ve had very significant acid reflux, trouble swallowing occasionally and constant need to clear my throat. The acid reflux and other stuff has been going on for about 3-4 months but it took me a while to figure out what was going on. It has been MUCH worse since the crash though.
My peaks in between the anxiety has been very good though.