I have been on this forum since 2008. Like the rest of us I was always looking into how fin has affected our hormones and how to reverse the effects. I now believe this could have been totally the wrong path to be on.
I got PFS in 2008. Sudden onset after 3 weeks of usage. My libido went to 0 almost overnight, over the next month more symptoms would show up. Total digestive changes, clear urine, receeding gums, fat on the hips.
As the years rolled on my condition seem to worsen. I could not gain any muscle and developed anxiety and a sense of apathy. I even tried high doses of testosterone.
Looking back at all of this. I felt really bad overall. So bad I do not think hormones could be the prime cause of some of these extreme symptoms.
From 2012 to 2016, I had a number of events where I would wake up at 4 am in cold sweats feeling that I was going to die. I also had severe nausea and diarrhea at these times. These seemed to only happen when my body was extra stressed.
Fast forward to 2015, I threw some chicken in the pot to boil with potatoes. Little did I know that stuck to the chicken was a plastic sachet which contained silica. This is used to drain the excess moisture away from the meat.
I boiled it all for hours. As soon as I ate this I suddenly felt worse, but I had no idea of the contamination. My face went more pale, under my eyes become much darker and started to feel cold. I woke up at 4 am feeling like I was going to die and could not get warm at all. Even though it was not even very cold. Perhaps about 20 degrees. This happened for 3 days in a row because I had no idea of the contamination till the 3rd day. On the 3rd night I woke up icy cold, shaking but this time my heart was beating out of sync for a few minutes and I felt a sensation in my chest. I thought I should get this checked so went to the hospital expecting an ultrasound.
I went to the hospital and refused doing an xray at least 3 times and asked for an ultrasound. In the end they lied and said they do not do ultrasounds there and I should do an xray. I stupidly agreed. This was the beginning of my real downfall.
I did the xray it was fine, within 5 minutes of having the xray they did do an ultrasound which was also fine. I left the hospital a number of hours later.
On the way home I felt a stabbing pain in the back left hand side of my head. This only lasted less than a minute but it was unmistakable as I had never experienced anything like it. My body recovered from the plastic but I started to feel very sad without reason. I had this feeling I was going to die. This was very strange. Within 4 days of leaving the hospital I developed a persisent pain in the left hand side of my head. The pain does radiate from the top to the back. I started feeling totally detatched from everything and depressed. I developed full blown anhedonia. I used to love listening to music and could now no longer enjoy it at all. I felt totally emotionless. Like my mind could no longer experience joy. This was terrifying and it is not a state a person can live in. I also started having feelings like I had to consciously act as my own ventilator. My instinct to breathe in got weaker and weaker by the day. I thought I would stop breathing as soon as I would fall asleep. And this did start happening. This was very scary. It did get better over time but I am worried I may have damaged my brain during that period due to lack of oxygen. A few weeks later I developed serious problems swallowing my food. My body and mind felt like I had been totally destroyed. All from eating some plastic and doing 1 chest xray. Around the time I was falling apart a strange viral type mark appeared on my stomach. Perhaps a herpies lesion. I never get these. I also developed inflamed sinusus around this time and then started getting random jerks in my body all day.
Now in 2017, I still have the constant headache and am having 100s of small jerks every day. My sinusus are blocked and a MRI showed a mucosal retention cyst. The mri also showed tiny dots in my brain. I still can not enjoy music and now have brain fog like many here. I have a lot of problems focusing. I also have extreme fatigue and also pains in the liver area.
Basically my PFS symptoms got 10x worse since that day. How is this possible. The only explanation I can find is that both the toxins and radiation surpressed my immune system which has been constantly batteling some kind of infection. It feels as if the infection made it straight to my brain during that period. I literraly feel like I have been to war and back.
The only explanation I can find for this is due to some kind of infection. I took no medicines at all. I have now developed a rash on the roof of my mouth on the same side as the head pain. The rash changes day to day. I also have enlarged lymp nodes in my throat which develop red spots every day or so. To me I am sure this is due to an active infection and now looking back on my PFS life I feel that many or most of the symptoms I was experiencing over the years were due to an infection. Perhaps there is more than one thing at play but I am sure an infection is a huge part.
I do happen to have some blood tests from a couple years before PFS and I can say my platelets dropped after getting PFS, my eosiniphils also went up. Maybe fin just like the xray stressed the immune system and let something get out of control which was being kept in check.
You will find that there is a study on people with lyme 50 percent of them reported loss of libido.
While I am in a terrible state since that day. I think it could be possible to recover and I think I should have explored this earlier. Large doeses of testosterone did very little for muscle but if the body is in a semi septic state would you expect it to?
I can not find any other explanation for all these symptoms.
Attached are some images of my palate and pharynx.
