I had a very odd thought the other day.
I feel that I would be absolutely fine with never seeing another human being again.
The though of being all alone the rest of my life didn’t bother me at all.
I was just neutral to it.
Heyder,
I think most of us are familiar with this feeling it’s like ambivalence to everything. The drug somehow changes our ability to have normal relationships with people. I have friends I always kept in touch with even though they don’t live close by. Since propecia, I didn’t care to call them. You don’t really care about anything, there is no emotion, motivation, etc.
Hang in there though man, it does get better and we have been making some progress with understanding what damage propecia has done.
Get used to the neutral thing. Basically real emotions are pretty much gone for me. I never feel joy, lust, romance, or connections to friends and family. Thing that sucks is you cant explain it to people because there is nothing in their experience to compare. They just cant figure out why you never call.
This must be the most terrible thing a person can experience. How can things get worse? I did not know what my worst nightmare was, but I do now. This is hell. I am literally trapped alone in hell. It is impossible to ever describe to those closest to you what has happened?
Needless to say if the side effects of propecia included ‘permanent anhedonia, so youll have to spend the rest of your life as a hermit’ I think I would of given the stuff a miss.
Why does this happen? There are only two possible reasons, as far as Im concerned, that can cause this.
1. Cell Death aka Apoptosis
Finasteride’s main use is to destroy androgen dependent tissue. In the prostate, but also in the genitals and the brain as a side effect. Whilst using, cells are destroyed and when you stop DHT rises creating a negative feedback on the pituitary to cease androgen production. Therefore damage occurs within the brains of those effected, mostly reducing lobido, but frequently any emotional response.
http://www.propeciahelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=4327
2. Epigenetic Changes (less likely in my opinion.)
Cells/AR’s which had previously been hypersensitive to androgens no longer are activated by androgens as they should resulting in a lack of gene expression. Apparantly caused when DHT rebounds after stopping and the cells undergo epigenetic changes, methylation etc, to protect the cells from the excess in androgens.
http://www.propeciahelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=2216
I dont really see how any other theory can account for this symptom. 
If someone can prove me wrong ill be happy.
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I agree with 3pm in regards to low dopimine being the cause.
When I first tested my dopimine levels it was 5 on a a scale of 4-15.2, I felt better then. Then it went up to 23, and the last one was 32.8. Now, I feel the worst of all. If you do some research on dopimine you will see that it has a lot to do with our emotions and our love for doing things. I just read that it’s also responsible for giving us our feeling of love. I have a gut feeling that if I could bring down my prolactin and increase my dopimine levels, that I will feel better. I am currently on my 3rd week of wellbutrin, but I dont feel that it’s doing anything to raise my dopimine levels. Maybe my really high prolactin levels are making it difficult for the drug to boost my dopimine levels…I really don’t know. The doctor is doing more testing on me, and will but me on dostinex if my prolactin is the same or higher next month.
Have any of you guys considered trying transcranial brain stimulation to help with anhedonia? I have been reading a lot of claims of people reversing andehonia with it. I know finasteride induced anhedonia is probably a lot different than the anhedonia someone experiences due to depression, but it might be worth looking into.
One of the machines is called neurostar and there are a lot of places near where I live that have the equipment to do this. Unfortunately I have metal in my body and am not a candidate or I would be all over this. Anyone else want to give it a shot? I know it is expensive, so that’s a problem too.
Joetz:
Recently I purchased an Alpha Stim SCS (Cranial Electrotherapy Stimulator) It’s a bit pricey, but I’ve been using it here while fasting for the past seven days, and while it is recommended to be used for a period of three weeks before passing judgement, I can already tell there is something to it.
I wanted something to help get my sleep a little better without resorting to drugs. Once I finished doing my research, I was very impressed with the documented results on brain damaged patients. IMO, that’s exactly what we are to some degree.
In all honesty, if you hadn’t posted this, I wouldn’t have even brought it up on this site. The negativity here is too much. It’s no wonder why people are going to remain sick forever.
You may be able to use this device. I’d contact the manufacturer and find out if I were you. If your sleep is a bit off and you still have anxiety once in awhile and are depressed, this thing will make a huge difference.
There is a high level of negativity here because we have all read countless threads where people say something like “I’M CURED!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!” and then three days later we find out that they are still sick
I’m going to look into picking up one of these gizmos and report my findings. It’s a little tricky because you need a doctor’s prescription and it is a bit expensive.
I got myself an alpha-stim scs without a prescription by finding a used one. I’m really hoping it helps my anhedonic flat moods. Maybe if I see some progress I’ll start a new thread on the subject.
I used to react strongly to music and art. I was romantic. I wrote poetry.
Now I’m much more blunted emotionally. I feel no joy. Neutral is a good word (used above).
Same here, exactly. Numbed, indifferent. Flatlined. Loss of pleasureable feelings or emotional reactions to things which once gave feelings of joy.
I can totally relate here. Before fin, i had grand plans to travel the world, used to love music and feel a full spectrum of emotions. I find it hard to keep in contact with people now as it’s hard to portray a positive attitude. The idea of living alone in a cabin in the woods actually seems pretty appealing.
Welcome to the land of misfit and sickened toys…I can certainly relate to this as well. I’m an artist and used to love interacting with people. Now, living away from anyone and everyone i know seems a good idea. Yep, we have old guy disease…exercise is a must, being around nice & positive people, and reading positive literature helps.
I used to be able to stand the company of cynics, intellectuals and thinkers, but now i seem to only gravitate towards the extremely humble, nice and shy and or misfit type’s. I also think of only pursuing woman who are sickened or maimed in some way. I feel that they will be the only ones to understand me and put up with me in the end.
Besides this depressing forum, we need more support as a community, because that’s what we are, like it or not.
We are brothers or a fraternity with a common illness. We should look out for one another. A positive suggestion (negative and weird to some here) down the road, and maybe even now, might be to have a roommate/housing posting for post fin. sufferers. We are a community of suffering men. Get over it and face the truth. I know I’m not the only mother fucker with this problem, but most of us have a hard time functioning in the real world, and making a living. So sticking together and helping one another out, is a must and a good thing in my book.
Also, if I had the cash and time, I would establish some form of free support group for post fin. sufferers. I noticed alot of guys on here, also want to talk to someone going through the same problem or whatever. Someone to relate to. No offense to mew or the forum, but this shit on here, is strictly informative and not a therapeutic outlet and can depress, frustrate, and baffle the shit out of you.
To begin for support, how about a weekly/monthly Skype conference? If interested, PM me. I’ve set up a Skype account as “Former” for anyone who would want to add me.
If I see that 2 or 3 people are interested, I’ll work to coordinate a time for discussion.
Take care,
Former
So many things have gotten me my emotions back for a day or 2 then it always levels out back to nothing…
I was on the raw food diet for a month( nothing changed and i continued to feel like a zombie)
I ate at an all you can eat chinese resteraunt and stuffed up on all kinds of meat and cooked stuff and my emotions came back for 2 days! Now today im back to nothing… so frusterated.
Quite interested. PM sent.
Every day this week I have had 1-2 hours of all my emotions coming back. I think I might be on the road to recovery. It started out a hour of recovery a week and then an hour recovery twice a week and now every day something amazing happens every day even though it is short lived. Another thing I have noticed is that my skin has become very oily since this has started. I think some of my hormones are coming back online.
I watched some movies this weekend which were hyped as emotional, moving, sad, etc., and while watching the movies, each time I found myself completely detached and unaffected. My enjoyment of the movies was nil. I watched the events unfold on the screen but there was no visceral reaction.
This is a stark contrast to the past: I used to be deeply moved by poignant movies and such. Even teared up at the end of Wrath of Khan (hehe).
Post-fin, I havent had such an experience.
I can really identify with those who don’t get the same experience from listening to music anymore. Very bizarre experience when I first noticed it. I can still feel something when I listen to certain music but its just not the same…