Very very angry, like a gorilla 24/7

Coping
#1

PFS makes me very angry and fight-starting. Sometimes I get angry at seeing my condition, my stunted muscles and horrible thin skin and start punching doors/mirrors. Gaming makes me rage super hard and punch my monitor. Other times just normal world things make me unexplainable violent, like at school if someone tried to bump into me or try to start shit it feels like satan has taken over my body, I get so rage filled I just want to deck the person and want to kill them. And all my PFS sides get worse when this happens. Infact right now I’m pissed off and how thin and fucked up my skin is along with the brain fog is unbelievable.

As soon as I feel improvements like when I first restarted minoxidil all of this goes away, my estrogen gets lowered and I feel civilized and smart again, not to mention becoming more attractive and all the other benefits that come with androgenic function. This is just complete hell and I need to get out of it, and if I can’t then I will fucking kill myself.

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#2

No easy fixes man unfortunately, anger and PFS might have a causal relationship or may just be associated with your general condition. This is a marathon, being perpetually angry and bitter is going to cause more suffering than we have to endure. You’re very young with possibly allot of hard years ahead, on the brighter side your situation could be significantly better in a few years time.

Best to try and change these thought patterns now before they get worse, won’t do you any favours living with rage in the real world thats for sure. I know it’s hard man I’ve had similar episodes myself and am starting therapy. We’re dealing with a chronic illness, we got to try and adopt a positive realistic mindset in order to avoid making things harder than they have to be.

Please don’t entertain serious suicidal thoughts thats a red flag something has to change.

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#3

Prefrontal cortex prob fucked up

#4

Tried therapy didn’t do crap. When I don’t have health issues I live an unbelievably good life but when I do they stunt me super hard.

Therapy is good for mindset but my mindset is good until these bad windows happen. I think it’s due to estrogen dominance, also got my T measured in December and it was 895ng/dl.

#6

Fair enough therapy doesn’t work for everyone, hopefully i can get some use out of it. So the anger just boils out and comes from nowhere? Have you got close family to talk to about whats going on? That has been the number 1 biggest help for me.

Personally I can go from grateful and appreciative for my life during the good periods to angry and depraved when it’s bad (this can vary quickly between or within a day). It’s easy to be balanced when circumstances permit. Hence I don’t think its a definite indicator of a purely physiological rather than psychological reason for these issues based on my experience. All I’m saying is just be careful trying to chase down causes and effects it’s a bit like chasing down moby dick and can be a massive source of anger and time. Good luck dude you’re very young and have huge potential to live well in the future.

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#7

What about your libido / sex drive ?

#8

Very bad

#9

I’d want to be you, I was angry ans tressed alot, and felt alive and lived of the very edge of life perpetually. Since fin I’m a little child, and can’t take my anger srriously. Nor that of others.

Was it only minox you took, or did you take fin as well

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