Very dark place!

#1

I’m in a very dark place right now !!! Suicide was the furthest thing on my mind till now. I used to be the user cjohnson(2010) on this forum I made a decent recovery & went on with my life was thankful to have a working function & able to have sex even if it wasnt as before. Basically forgot all about pfs until revisiting dec 18’ because of shrinkage happening again as well as weaker erection quality. ITS LIKE NO MATTER WHAT I DO!!! I DEAL WITH SHRINKAGE DAILY. RELAX ,MEDITATE, WORKOUT, EAT HEALTHIER SMARTER, NO FAP, AVOID PORN, NO DRUGS (NEVER WAS BIG ON). I’m actually at a time of my life were everything I worked for is My current life (new apt, loving girlfriend, artistic career, loving family) I’m normally the voice of reason in my family but my voice is saying fuck it!

I remember my family thought I was crazy around 2010-13 to regain my health back with thousands of dollars of debt

I forgot how this crash place felt from 2010. I dread the whole idea of waking up every day to deal with more shrinkage which seems impossible.

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#2

That you recovered once is a good sign surely? I assume you don’t know why your condition worsened later on?

It’s a crazy condition but as you will know better than most people here, it’s not necessarily permanent.

Imagine if you killed yourself the day before your body started to recover again?

I assume you have tried a variety of things to help?

#3

If you are getting voices in your head telling you to kill your self don’t try to reason with them. Phone a suicide hotline immediately or go to a&e and don’t feel ashamed because it takes real strength to reach out to strangers and ask for help.

Penile shrinkage is not something a normal person would commit suicide over. That’s a sign you’re under extreme stress or your mental health has been compromised.

The shrinkage is no longer your first concern. You need to put it to one side and deal with the stress that’s making you feel suicidal. Your mind is struggling to deal with the crash. Don’t deal with that alone get professional help.
You could speak with a therapist online tomorrow while you’re waiting to see your normal MD.

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#4

If you crashed in december hang on for a while, all of my crashes have made me live unbearable situations for at least 10 months after the crash. Then things tend to get MUCH BETTER mentally (which is the most important thing because if you are well mentally you can even accept big changes in your body), and after this time it is also the usual thing to stop worsening physically.

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#5

A “normal person” does not get penile shrinkage.

I can’t overstate how much I disagree with your views on “mental health”.

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#6

Feeling hopeless again seems no matter what I do or dont do doesnt help. shrinkage is daily no matter what

#7

Dude you have to stop feeling hopeless. There is so much more hope on the horizon than before.

I know that people don’t want to make promises they can guarantee but I think it’s pretty obvious that we may see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Seriously man just hang in there.

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#8

Don’t worry man we’re all going to get through this shit hang in I know something will come up!

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