I continue to have to buy new clothes for work. My belly swells enormously. Unreal. Always been a thin guy. Not anymore. 1 week my pants are too small, the next none of them fucking fit. Up and down up and down. I am going to quit this career and get on some disability.
So many happy men I work with. So many sexy bitches. Taunting me every day. Never in 1000 yrs would I expect this for my life.
No amount of money is going to help.
I would prefer my healthy life than 100 million dollars at that moment, honestly even if merck go bankrupt i wouldnt care. I guess mcibofh, scaredoutofmymind and me have worst pfs on this forum. And probably daniel and randy were same with us becuase if i read their story i notice its very similar with me. Everyday is passing between life and death on my state now. Especially when youre parents didnt belive you, you are trying to act like normal because when you didnt, youre facing with new troubles. At that point i lost my all respect in society, i lost my whole friends, i lost my face, eyes, body, brain and ears. The sudden lost of all part of your body is not only making you suicidal but losing your sanity. Youre asking some questions to yourself: what am i living for? For my parents who dont believe me and underrestimate my disease? Or for my friends who think im totally crazy? For some tiny happiness? No, i cant feel them. For cure? At that point i dont think its possible.
So guys what am i living for?
And for those who say me that they are bothered from negative thoughts can fuck off. This forum isnt hellokittys forum.
Seems to not make a difference that I only took for 9 days. Seems I was destined to get crushed by this FUCKING POISON! FUUUCKKKKK GOODBYE FUCKING LIFE!
This is what propecia has done to my hips/bone structure and fat!! I used to have a v shaped pelvis with hardly any body fat. I had the tapered V body style. Got alot of compliments from girls qhen taking the shirt off. Now I walk and stand awkwardly, feel like im built for child birth. Im kot exxagerating here is a picture of my fucked up body[youtube][/youtube]
About to quit job quit taking medicine and head out to the streets. Atleast ill have no responsibilities or anyone to answer to. Homelessness until I starve to death or get killed. Fuckin over it already.
I cant handle this anymore. Im done NO ANSWERS FROM THIS BOARD. You would think among the mass sufferers by law of fuvking averages we would have found SOMETHING that works. YET WE HAVE NOTHING! I HELD ON FOR 2 YEARS KEPT THINKING JUST GIVE IT TIME, GIVE IT TIME. NOW IM WORSE WITH TIME!! HAHAHAHAHABHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
QUIT DRINKING 2 YRS AGO. GAVE LIFE TO “GOD”. HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAGAHAHAHAHAGA. ID BE KORE HAPPY GETTING WASTED EVERY NIGHT. FUCK ALL FUCK EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE. FUVK THIS WORLD I DIDNT ASK FOR ANY OF IT ANYTHING…WAS BORN A HAPPY HEALTHY MAN. NNNNIIIIIINNNNNNEEEE DDDDDAAAAAYYYYYSSS!!! 1 HAIRLOSSS PILLLL FOR 9 FUCKING DAYYYYSSSSS! 9 PILLLSSSS RUINED THIS FUCKING MAN AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGAHAHAHAYAGAHAGAGAHAHAG
Need to pull myself together here. Nothing to gain from this madness and anger.
I will pull the trigger and end it like a man or shut up and fight on. Cant stay in the middle in despair.
I don’t know how many times I’ve had a mental breakdown over the last 6 years. I was close to committing suicide on May 15th, 2010. Anyway, there’s not much to say. There are times when I’m looking forward to the day I die - but until then, whether it’s by choice, incident or natural cause, I’m doing all I can to figure a way out of this.
I want to live without restraint, and I want revenge.
dude stay strong I know this is not easy for any of us but you have to keep going and dont give up.
I took 0.25 mg only and ended up shit and nobody wants to believe me but suicide is not the answer.
I dont wanna say your problems are from depression just as mine arent but just being depressed can cause lots of side effects by itself such as weight increase or loss, dont underestimate how that could affect you.
There’s a lot of stuff that can make you feel better. I took this shit for 11 years and stacked it with Avodart so I was up to my neck with sides. Message me if you’d like to talk about stuff that can help
background: took Propecia 4 years, Proscar 3 years, stopped 4 years ago, got serious about recovery and following the advice on PH about 10 months ago.
IT WAS THIS LAST 10 MONTHS OF ACTUALLY DOING WHAT OTHERS HAVE RECOMMENDED which has brought about the VAST MAJORITY of my recovery. If you want to hear my story, I’m “John Davis” on the PFS podcast.
Hey man, please know that a vast majority of us have been through the same thing. You can read my old posts, then see how things began to improve over time for me. THERE ARE MANY THINGS you can do to get back on the right track. And I must say that one of them is likely due to stress considering your post about work and wanting to quit. I’m just now learning ‘how to’ meditate and take control of my own thoughts, emotions and beliefs. But I’ve already made progress in this area to some extent by reading self help books, doing research, buying and taking the right vitamins, supplements and following just about EVERY protocol mentioned on this forum. It might seem overwhelming and expensive, so just try to look at it this way… It’s a large book with many chapters. Dedicate yourself to reading it ‘one chapter’ at a time and following the advice in incremental steps. YOU WILL BEAT THIS! YOU MUST BEAT THIS!
I seriously want to help you out man! Seriously. So please PM me and we can start chatting about solutions. I found my number ONE enemy to be a ‘negative, critical, judgmental and angry mindset’. (Certainly justified considering what Merck did to us). This kept me in a perpetual battle with myself and severely limited my ability to heal. I call these deadly emotions, and they DO have a negative physical impact on the body. This can compound the effects of PFS imo.
Regarding the sex sides, I had the same thing, shrinkage, body fat, pot belly… But now, I can get a raging hard on with the same FULL size I had years ago, testicles hang like they are supposed to and I’m getting the V shape in my torso from workouts and eating right. Keep in mind, I took this poison for 7 years, not 9 days. I would be willing to bet that you could bounce back faster than me if you take action and follow the advice on this forum.
If you are taking any SSRI’s, I strongly encourage you to watch the video from Link TV called “The Dark Side of a Pill”.
Anti-depressants can cause people to react and behave EXACTLY as YOU have portrayed in your post/rant. From my own experience, SSRI’s did NOT work and made matters worse. Since I stopped all medications 10 months ago, I’ve dramatically reduced the depression and anxiety by doing natural things like eating right and taking all the right vit/supps and working out.
Please, let the guys on here who want to help you get involved on a personal level and stay in contact as you progress. I was fortunate enough to be contacted by another PFSer who only lives a mile down the road from me. Talking with someone who shares the same condition is extremely helpful. This really helped me to stop being so hard on myself, and to begin having compassion and understanding for myself and others.
Let’s start by getting control of your own thoughts. Our thoughts can lie to us you know… It’s up to us to choose which voice to listen to, and do battle with the one intent on killing us.
Wow, good post.
I almost want to cry from the hope that I received from your post. To think I can be off all these antidepressants and remeron one day and be able to function right is a huge hope for me. I look forward to a time where I can literally JUST LIVE. NO MORE MEDICINE AND UNWANTED SIDE EFFECTS. But in my fragile mental state I ofcoure wont get off the antideoressants without help from a doc first. Bjt with that said I believe 5 yeaes from now I will be able to rise in the morning, eat right, workout, and sleep and repeat like a normal person. Life without the aid of medication is a huge hope. Because I know they are making me even more fat and impotent. But they are virtually essential right now to function. I will take it easy and relax and keep my workouts regular. You have given me hope. That is priceless in this situation. Even if I have to have plastic surgery on my face I will do whatever it takes.
Snap!
My dick was 7 inches erect, it’s now thin and length is 4 inches at best
with all respect. It’s impossible! the penis does not change size.
but if you are right, then it is possible to increase also. is decreased, then it is possible to increase.
did you try andractim?