Everything i try makes shit worse! 2 years now im getting worse! Great job, great position in life but under all that Im fucked beyond belief! Fuckin motherfucker this shit has ripped me apart! Fuckin beautiful women everywhere! Was so close to suicide in my fucking hotel last night cant tale this ass raping anymore. Face, UNVELIEVABLE SHRUNKEN GENITALS WORSENING KEEPS GETTING FUCKING SMALLER AND ANNOYING AND SMALL AND TINY AND FUCK MY FUCKIMG MOTHER WTF!! CANNOT EVEN WALK RIGHT ANYMORE MY BODY HAS DEFORMED SO FUCKING UNBELIEVABLE I WALK WITH MY BALLS AND NUTS RIDING UP INTO MY PELVIS BETWEEN THIGHS BECAUSE TOO SMALL TO HANG. UNBELIEVABEL IN FATHOMABLE WILL NOT ACCEPT AN TTYLONGER IM SHITTING OUT FOOD AS I EAT IT NO DIGESTION. BELLY SWELLS LIKE IM LREGNANT IF I EAT 1 THING OEOPLE LOOK AT ME LIKE ALIEN LIFE FORM. FACE HOLLOWED AND AGED MUSCLEZ WEAKEND DRY FUCKING HAIR AND SKIN, REDICULOUS FUCKING REDICULOUS BODY FAT EVERYWHERE, HOLLOW FEELING IN SKULL NO JOY OR ENERGY…DEATH WILL INSUE IN MY HOTEL TONIGHT. TIRED AND SICK OF THIS UNBELIEVABLE REDICULOUS EXCUSE FOR A LIFE SO FUCKING RETARDEDD AND STUPID I DONT NEED TO PUT UP WITH IT ANYMORE THIS IS NOT MY BODY, NOT MY MIND, NOT MY LIFE I WILL REFUSSSEEE TO ACCEPT THIS. IT CAN TAKE MY LIFE FROM ME, BUT I WONT ALLOW IT TO PERSIST FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE I WILL BE A DEAAD CORPSE IN 8 HRS. GOODBEY GUYS HOPE YALL GET ON OK BUT HONESTLY I THINK MANY WILL FOLLOW MY PATH. IM OUT. HAD A GREAT GOODBYE DINNER AND SAW ALL MY FAMILY BEFORE LEAVING TOWN FOR WORK SO I HAVE SAID ALL MY GOODBYES. COULDBT BE A BETTER TIME TO DO IT. THANK GOD FOR MY 23 BEAUTIFUL YEARS OF LIFE BEFORE PROPECIA. THE LAST TWO SHALL BE ERASED FROM MY MEMORY AS THEY WERE NOT REALLY ME AT ALL.
I REALLY WANT BLOOD!! IM MURDEROUS AND HATE FILLED. WANT TO KILL 1000 PEOPLE SO ANGRY! THEN I WANT TO KILL THIS BODY OF MY OWN!
ok if you re seriously wanting to kill yourself, even after the recent recoveries…you re out of your mind for real. try to calm down. do you have money to buy an enema kit ? or get a package deal on a hidrocolon clinic ? try to do 12, try to get a hold to cerebrolysin, try ozonetherapy ( im on my third session and man this shit is for real ) , try the tribullus that cured apr1989. Do not kill yourself yet. People are getting better over time, I got better over time. I tried everything that was possibly avalable under the sun and it worked man. DONT LISTEN TO ANYONE here saying that this is not curable. IT IS. believe me. IT WILL GET BETTER!!! IF you fix your body and give the right tools, it will happen.
Even if I recovered mentally and physically and libido returned, my dick used to be 7.5" and is now 3 to 4 inches when erect. This seems irreversible to me and it is sufficient enough to make me go ahead and kill myself. Born well endowed. Now dick is small and limp. No I wont live like this or accept it at all.
No one can argue against this. You know and I know how bad it really is. If you loom at this situation with 100% honesty, and take it in for what it is, you will go out and buy a gun and kill yourself. No question.
If you’re feeling angry and wanting blood you can only get that by being alive. Merck certainly won’t pay if you’re dead. In fact, you’ll be doing them a favour. Let the world and Merck know about what they’ve done to you. Make them accountable. You may have a smaller dick but you can still fuck them hard. Hang in there.
I continue to have to buy new clothes for work. My belly swells enormously. Unreal. Always been a thin guy. Not anymore. 1 week my pants are too small, the next none of them fucking fit. Up and down up and down. I am going to quit this career and get on some disability.
So many happy men I work with. So many sexy bitches. Taunting me every day. Never in 1000 yrs would I expect this for my life.
No amount of money is going to help.
I would prefer my healthy life than 100 million dollars at that moment, honestly even if merck go bankrupt i wouldnt care. I guess mcibofh, scaredoutofmymind and me have worst pfs on this forum. And probably daniel and randy were same with us becuase if i read their story i notice its very similar with me. Everyday is passing between life and death on my state now. Especially when youre parents didnt belive you, you are trying to act like normal because when you didnt, youre facing with new troubles. At that point i lost my all respect in society, i lost my whole friends, i lost my face, eyes, body, brain and ears. The sudden lost of all part of your body is not only making you suicidal but losing your sanity. Youre asking some questions to yourself: what am i living for? For my parents who dont believe me and underrestimate my disease? Or for my friends who think im totally crazy? For some tiny happiness? No, i cant feel them. For cure? At that point i dont think its possible.
So guys what am i living for?
And for those who say me that they are bothered from negative thoughts can fuck off. This forum isnt hellokittys forum.
Seems to not make a difference that I only took for 9 days. Seems I was destined to get crushed by this FUCKING POISON! FUUUCKKKKK GOODBYE FUCKING LIFE!
This is what propecia has done to my hips/bone structure and fat!! I used to have a v shaped pelvis with hardly any body fat. I had the tapered V body style. Got alot of compliments from girls qhen taking the shirt off. Now I walk and stand awkwardly, feel like im built for child birth. Im kot exxagerating here is a picture of my fucked up body[youtube][/youtube]
About to quit job quit taking medicine and head out to the streets. Atleast ill have no responsibilities or anyone to answer to. Homelessness until I starve to death or get killed. Fuckin over it already.
I cant handle this anymore. Im done NO ANSWERS FROM THIS BOARD. You would think among the mass sufferers by law of fuvking averages we would have found SOMETHING that works. YET WE HAVE NOTHING! I HELD ON FOR 2 YEARS KEPT THINKING JUST GIVE IT TIME, GIVE IT TIME. NOW IM WORSE WITH TIME!! HAHAHAHAHABHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
QUIT DRINKING 2 YRS AGO. GAVE LIFE TO “GOD”. HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAGAHAHAHAHAGA. ID BE KORE HAPPY GETTING WASTED EVERY NIGHT. FUCK ALL FUCK EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE. FUVK THIS WORLD I DIDNT ASK FOR ANY OF IT ANYTHING…WAS BORN A HAPPY HEALTHY MAN. NNNNIIIIIINNNNNNEEEE DDDDDAAAAAYYYYYSSS!!! 1 HAIRLOSSS PILLLL FOR 9 FUCKING DAYYYYSSSSS! 9 PILLLSSSS RUINED THIS FUCKING MAN AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGAHAHAHAYAGAHAGAGAHAHAG
Need to pull myself together here. Nothing to gain from this madness and anger.
I will pull the trigger and end it like a man or shut up and fight on. Cant stay in the middle in despair.
I don’t know how many times I’ve had a mental breakdown over the last 6 years. I was close to committing suicide on May 15th, 2010. Anyway, there’s not much to say. There are times when I’m looking forward to the day I die - but until then, whether it’s by choice, incident or natural cause, I’m doing all I can to figure a way out of this.
I want to live without restraint, and I want revenge.
dude stay strong I know this is not easy for any of us but you have to keep going and dont give up.
I took 0.25 mg only and ended up shit and nobody wants to believe me but suicide is not the answer.
I dont wanna say your problems are from depression just as mine arent but just being depressed can cause lots of side effects by itself such as weight increase or loss, dont underestimate how that could affect you.