Severe Depression Feel Physically Sick

A week after my last crash I have been hit with severe depression.
My head hurts and I feel physically sick in my body. I just want to curl up in a ball. This has been going on for over a week and improves in the evening. Normally it only lasts a day or two.

Sadly the thought of hanging myself is the only comforting thought.

My IBS has also flared up at the same time.

I am trying a single strain probiotic L. Casei which has made small improvements to mood.

Has anyone had success in treating depression with probiotic strains?

Has anyone been through these depressive physically sick symptoms? How long do these episodes last?

Brain Medications cause severe reactions and worsen my symptoms. I’ve considered checking into a mental hospital although concerned they will make me take drugs.

It’s a beautiful sunny day here in the UK but it makes no difference.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0899900715003913

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Mate, you have been here when I felt shit and offered support no matter what.
I only have words of comfort to offer you BUT PLEASE REMEMBER THE DISEASE IS making you feel like this.
PLEASE HANG ON.

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Please, friends, PFS sufferers, calling on the guys online. Drop a line to a fellow friend who is having a hard time. We all have bad times and need to vent and feel alone. I posted a gloomy thread two weeks ago and I felt somehow better by just having a little message of support by people who understand… I was talking to a friend who knows about my PFS and told him that I could think of suicide and and I felt some uneasiness… Please use the forum to vent this, no need to be ashamed… We put a lot of shit on ourselves already so please offer support, drop a line, reach to the op… You might be happy and grateful if someone does this for you…
I know Il will fell shit some day and will be happy to get some comfort…
It is cool to write endless protocol discussions ( which unfortunately divide us sometimes), but first and foremost, this place should be a place of helping each other.
Thank you for those who read and send some hugs to @ac3c, he bloody needs it.

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I am so sorry to hear, mate! I have been there many, many, many times and still get there again occasionally. The pain is unfathomable and only people who have been there can understand.

One thought that has given me a lot of comfort in these dark times is imagining that I have already died. Yes, my life was unsalvageable, what I had become was absolutely unacceptable. They had destroyed my body, my brain, my dreams, my potential, my life. They had murdered me. I was done.

Come sweat death…

Then I would imagine I am actually dead and buried. All my belongings are discarded. My loved ones mourn but eventually learn to get by without me. The world keeps turning.

That’s a real shame though because this dead person knew some pretty important things that take a while to learn in life. He could also have done some pretty valuable things, if he had tried - both for his family and for the world. If only it were possible for the information in his brain to be taken out somehow and put to good use after this death.

That would require having some sort of body though. What if the person could actually be resurrected? It would be a completely different being though - a benevolent zombie with a new set of needs, hopes, and expectations. He would be driven by pragmatic, action-oriented goals meant to get out into the world as much of the value he holds in his brain as possible. Wouldn’t that be great help for his family and for the world?

Sounds like it would be. Definitely!

But that’s actually kinda doable. Pretend you died. Your expectations died with you. Now you are reborn and you have a new mission - get the useful stuff out! This zombie now has a body and can do some things in the world!

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I had severe pfs induced “depression” (not really the accurate word for it) so bad I thought I was going to pass out at times. Sat with nausea all day. I thought it would never pass. It did.

I too crashed a couple of days ago. Shattered brain, head pressure, rocking at sea vertigo amongst other neurological symptoms. Haven’t left the house for a couple of days. It’s the worst I’ve felt, neurologically, for months. As always, part of me thinks it won’t improve from here but I have to almost think in the third person and remind myself that it will improve. I hope you can do that too. Also, my symptoms worsen if I’m exposed to the sun so the good weather doesn’t mean a great deal to me either :hugs:

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I’ve been there too. It will pass too. Unfortunately, PSSD/PFS is a sine wave. You have to be prepared for constant ups and downs. Although suffering and pain make you feel it will be always like that, but it’s not true, even brain can’t remain in state of depression forever.

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Stay strong bro. When the depression hits, I try to just think of my loved ones and how their lives are going and feel happy for them. It helps a bit.

The depression imo is THE worst symptom of pfs. If you have, say, anxiety, you can still cope by thinking “yeah but millions of people have anxiety and have good lives”. If you have loss of libido, you can think yeah but theres lots of people who are paralyzed and lost their sexual function. And still have good lives. But with the depression, you CAN’T do this because the depressive feelings overpower everything. It sucks. Seems to come and go for me.

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