pvdls story

Member Stories
#1
  1. Where are you from (country)?
    Germany
  2. How did you find this forum (Google search – if so, what search terms? Via link from a forum or website – if so, what page? Other?)
    Google Search
  3. What is your current age, height, weight?
    25, 196cm, 80 kg
  4. Do you excercise regularly? If so, what type of excercise?
    No
  5. What type of diet do you eat (vegetarian, meat eater, raw, fast-food/organic healthy)?
    meat eater
  6. Why did you take Finasteride (hair loss, BPH, other)?
    to prevent hairloss
  7. For how long did you take Finasteride (weeks/months/years)?
    2.5 month
  8. How old were you, and WHEN (date) did you start Finasteride?
    24 year, 27. Dec 2013
  9. How old were you when you quit, and WHEN (date) did you quit?
    25 year, 10.03.2014
  10. How did you quit (cold turkey or taper off)?
    cold turkey
  11. What type of Finasteride did you use – Propecia, Proscar, Fincar or other generic?
    Propecia
  12. What dose did you take (eg. 1 mg/day, 1 mg every other day etc.)?
    1 mg/day
  13. How long into your use of Finasteride did you notice the onset of side effects?
    side effects were immediate
  14. What side effects did you experience while on the drug that have yet to resolve since discontinuation?

Put an X beside all that apply:

Sexual
[X ] Loss of Libido / Sex Drive
[ ] Erectile Dysfunction
[ ] Complete Impotence
[X] Loss of Morning Erections
[X] Loss of Spontaneous Erections
[X] Loss of Nocturnal Erections
[X] Watery Ejaculate
[X] Reduced Ejaculate
[ ] Inability to Ejaculate / Orgasm
[ ] Reduced Sperm Count / Motility

Mental
[ ] Emotional Blunting / Emotionally Flat
[ ] Difficulty Focusing / Concentrating
[ ] Confusion
[ ] Memory Loss / Forgetfullness
[ ] Stumbling over Words / Losing Train of Thought
[ ] Slurring of Speech
[X] Lack of Motivation / Feeling Passive / Complacency
[X] Extreme Anxiety / Panic Attacks
[X] Severe Depression / Melancholy
[ ] Suicidal Thoughts

Physical
[X] Penile Tissue Changes (narrowing, shrinkage, wrinkled)
[ ] Penis curvature / rotation on axis
[ ] Testicular Pain
[ ] Testicular Shrinkage / Loss of Fullness
[ ] Genital numbness / sensitivity decrease
[ ] Weight Gain
[X] Gynecomastia (male breasts)
[X] Muscle Wastage
[ ] Muscle Weakness
[ ] Joint Pain
[ ] Dry / Dark Circles under eyes

Misc
[ ] Prostate pain
[ ] Persistent Fatigue / Exhaustion
[ ] Stomach Pains / Digestion Problems
[ ] Constipation / “Poo Pellets”
[ ] Vision - Acuity Decrease / Blurriness
[ ] Increased hair loss
[ ] Frequent urination
[X] Lowered body temperature

[X] Other (please explain)
-extreme facial fat loss (cheekbones, under eyes, forhead, temples, sunken cheeks)
-reduced bone density (jaw, chin and cheekbone shrinkage)
-very skinny neck (loss of 3-5 cm in circumfrence)
-smaller adamsapple (from large to almost not visible)
-thinner, pale, and dry skin (I used to have thick skin)
-eyebrows are thinner and less dense and have a lighter color
-hair is greyish/ lost color and is thinner
-slower beard growth
Result:
-I look more feminine and childish (loss of masculinity)
-at the same time i look run down, like a drug addict, and fragile
-vibrance is lost, colorless

  1. What (if any) treatments have you undertaken to recover from your side effects since discontinuation of the drug?
    I eat healthier.
  2. If you have pre or post-Finasteride bloodtests, what hormonal changes have you encountered since discontinuing the drug (pls post your test results in the “Blood Tests” section and link to them in your post)?
    I had no blood test yet, as I will not swallow any medicine in future to correct any blood profile abnormalities.
  3. Anything not listed in the above questions you’d like to share about your experience with Finasteride?
    I hate this poison. It has wrecked my looks and sexual life. Also I feel like I lost my old identiy, as my old face is gone and I look run down /lifeless.
  4. Tell us your story, in your own words, about your Finasteride usage and side effects experienced while on/off the drug.

I have learnt that our body is a complex LIVING organism, that regenerates itself constantly. It works perfectly but is so complex that any severe intervention or hormonal change can destroy its regenerating abilities and throw it totally off balance. Finasteride has resulted in me becoming less masculine, as vital dht is now not arriving at the places it needs to. The facial and bodily changes reflect the severly impaired sexual and mental health. One can not view these symptoms in isolation, as many doctors would like to, but has to view them as part of a package. I wish I could travel back in time and warn my old healthy, good looking and energetic self.

Further information:
The facial changes really started to kick in about 2 month after quitting. However they immediatley started; as I lost fat under my eyes almost immediatley. Loss of fat is a tingly/ itchy feeling and bone dull pain. The jaw cheekbones and chin are less pronounced now. The hair started loosing color cand contrast slowly and got more grey over time. Lost semen volume started immediatley and is what I first noticed. However I was told that it would stop after a while on the drug.

#2

Any trouble with length and depth of sleep? I took this drug for 24 days. I have been off of it for almost 3 months. I lost fat around my eyes. Also got dry eyes, dry mouth. I have had to medicate to get deep enough sleep. Today is the first day I felt somewhat normal in terms that I had some energy. I lost 10-15Lbs of muscle already… I am now just fighting to get through each day.

#3

My sleep has been worse since Finasteride. I wake up earlier and have difficulty falling back to sleep/ light sleep.

However thats not my main issue.

What I have noticed recently is that I also have difficulty concentrating and I might have some memory issues. I also am very little energy.

Emotionally the most devastating part is the outer deteroriation of my face, hair and body. When I look in the mirrow I dont recognize myself anymore and I look run down like a drug addict. Its heart breaking to me and as far as I can see, there is no hope for recovery in this department (facial lipoatrophy, bone density loss, wrinkled dry skin).

#4

sry…I wrote the above post but accidently posted it over the account of my brother. :unamused:

#5

Update (6, January 2015):

My state is continuing to deteriorate.

[Size=4]Physical: [/size]

  • facial bone wastage (jaw, chin and cheebones, my face has become smaller/narrower), since onset this has continued, it might be stabelizing now. This has not been recognized by the foundation yet, however I can guarantee that both my brother and I are experiencing it. For us it is accompanied with sharp bone pain.
    -facial fat loss, I am looking even more gaunt; this is accmpanied with a ticklish feeling.
    -penile shrinkage has started, erections are smaller (loss of width in particular), the balls are tugged in and less full, penis hangs narrow and shrivel up
  • my neck is extremly skinny, adams apple still reduzed in size (from very prominent to almost non existant :frowning: )
  • muscle loss on forearms (newly developed)
  • less pubic hair
    -bouts of hot feet (my brother had this also), I still have it. I dont know why. But they are extremly hot while my body is cold. This might sound hypochondriac but it is absolutely related. I never had extremly hot feet while my body was cold.
    -puffy nipples

[Size=4]Sexual:[/size]
-Worsening!: absolutley zero morning erection and even lower libido than a few month ago, basically almost no libido

  • no/ extremly rare spontaneous erections
    -very low semen volume (funnily enough my brother and I develop this stuff in concert, My semen volume has also collapsed in the last weeks, often only drops come out)
    -force of ejaculation reduced enormously (aka no force :slight_smile: ), basically before it was forcefully squished out and now it runs out with no feedback
  • no sexul energy, often I do feel lie a radioactive substance is housing in my balls
  • pain in the balls/ penis
    -penis funnily enough often feels much harder (unhealthly so) than before PFS and is very veiny.

[Size=4]New symptoms: [/size]

  • brain pressure, I had this quite severely in November, December, it is now better again thankfully. I first noticed it in June btw. Didnt think it was PFS related but now I am certain it is.
    -lowered body temperature has been more annoying recently
  • light sleep and difficulty falling asleep has increased.

[Size=4]Mental:[/size]
-Mentally I am stabilizing a bit (less anxiety). However my anxiety was probably a reaction to my deterioration and not PFS itself. My brother and myself have not been hit too hard on the brainfog front, even though we are not quite as sharp as before. However I do have very reduced energy levels. Before PFS I was bubbling over with energy, now I dont experience this anymore. I guess the plug has been pulled. When I wake up I feel like a truck ran me over.

[Size=4]General Thoughts[/size]
So all in all im am deteriorating. Its getting worse and worse, just like with my brother. We have funnily enough, EXACTLY! the same symptoms, even time wise they develop at similar intervals. We have literally transformed from above the range horny and potent (judging from libido, cock size and sperm volume) , to sexual persona non gratas. I mention this, because people often think that because they where very potent before taking finasteride, they cant be affected. Totally false. Even if you excel, propecia can transform you into a sexual zombie.

Btw, for all of you gym / homebrew nuts: My brother worked out religiously (contrary to pre pfs, not gaining much muscle while doing so), and has deteriorated in lockstep with myself. I have not worked out at all really. So there has been no positive effect if we compare us. My brother has not improved due to his workouts.

#6

It tells me genetic predisposition plays a big role in this mess. You and your brother are proofs.

#7

Btw, regarding the harder more veiny penis, I of course mean the erect state. Its harder, narrower and very veiny. The hardness in this case is a unhealty sign, as it is harder than my healthy pre fin erection. One could say its a gaunt penis :smiley:. The at/ muscle tissue around it has wasted away.

#8

Yes. Genetics is the only thing that could account for some users experiencing massive side effects, and others non. At least thats what the layman would think. The researchers will have to find the answers.

#9

Are you saying that both you and your brother have PFS??

#10

yes. we both got fucked over badly.

#11

Good, that’s two for the studies. When are you flying to the states to participate?

#12

So, you and Notna are Brothers?

That figures

#13

We dont want you to off yourself. We like you too much :stuck_out_tongue: .

Pls reconsider your plan.

#14

You two, if your not one of the same are both very unique in that you like to argue and annoy people but me and Notna made up and I’m pleased about that

It just seems that you pvdl, wants to be very immature, despite you allegedly been the older sibling

#15

Lets get this straight: When you come on here, and announce your suicide intentions, despite having a baby son, saying life is not worth living because your cock is not working, you are mature?

Good one.

#16

How are you and your brother doing pvdl? You appear not to have posted here in a while and I saw when I logged in just now that you had posted in another thread. I didn’t want to derail it by asking after you there so here I am. Hope that you are both doing okay.

#17

Thank you for asking.

Me and my brothers PFS is in a stable state since last year (2015). Basically no improvements but no new bad news either (except a little weight gain in the midsection).

I am continuing with my studies at university and hope to be finished with that at the beginning of next year. As I said right at the beginning of this horror, it is important that we all try to earn an income. If we are all broke the foundation cant sustain itself.

I hope you are coping as well.

Greetings,

pvdl

#18

Here is a more detailed update (for those interested).

Below are my current symptoms and what I do to deal with PFS. Below is also a quick description of my pre fin self so you get an idea of the impact PFS has had in my case. I am 27 years old now.

[Size=4]A) My Symptoms:
[/size]

I call my symptoms the big four:

1. Fatique/ lack of energy: I either have no excess energy or I have crushing fatique. In the first case I can do my daily task, albeit with less force and effectivness than previously (before fin). In the other state it takes significant! discpline to continue with my daily routines.


Pre Fin: I was extremly! (not joking) energetic. My energy levels where so high that even my most energetic friend said that it could get too much. This is probably the biggest difference pre and post fin and the most annoying symptom.

2. Facial transformation and bodily changes:

I have lost a lot of fat in my face and my skin is a lot thinner. Like my brother my jaw, cheekbones and chin is less pronounced (loss of bone, again deadly serious, stable since end of 2015).

Bodily wise, my neck and arms are thinner and my adams apple is a lot smaller (from very pronounced to not noticable). I have also gained a lot of fat in the midsection.

This change is very hard to accept, as we have such a strong identification with our face. The hard reality: You not only feel less masculine but you also look less masculine.

3. Impairment of sexual function: In this deparment I suffer from less sperm volume, no or much smaller morning erections, no spontaenous erections, much lower libido and penile shrinkage.

Pre Fin: Again I am not bragging when I tell you this: I had much higher sex drive than average and a (significantly) larger than average penis. Now my sex drive is much lower than average and my penis has shrunken considerably in width and length.

4. Anxiety: This symptom is easiest to deal with. I know that it passes, it never stays around for more than 2 hours. I would say however, that rather often this anxiety is quietly in the background as I complete daily tasks. Before I had a sex drive/ confidence in the background.

Pre Fin: I never experienced anxiety. This is a completly new feeling for me.

Its harder to concentrate as well, however I was rather lucky with this symtom as I dont have severe brain fog. I would say 80-85% of my concentration ability is still here.

[Size=4]B) What I am doing to combat above symptoms and deal with PFS:[/size]

1. The most important thing I do, is that I continue to fight for the goals I had before finasteride. This helps considerably as it limits the damage PFS has done and is doing to my life. The more I complete the tasks I set myself, the better I feel about my situation. It distracts from PFS and gives me reason to continue living!

Obviously this takes enormous self discpline and an iron will.

Currently I am studying for exams at university.

2. Self acceptance and love instead of self pitty.

This is also a very important concept for me. I have realised that the more I pitty myself, the worse my anxiety gets and the worse I feel in general. If instead I accept the massive mistake I made and stop hating myself for it, I start to feel more relaxed and willing to start my day. This is also the reason why I stay off this forum as much as possible (months on end).

Again, this is of course a struggle. It takes practice and extreme discipline. I might even start meditating, as metnal toughness is essential when dealing with PFS. This mental toughness muscle has to be trained like crazy. More even than the physical muscles.

3. Regular excercise

I do regular excercise. This is fantastic because I feel energized afterwards. I basically have no fatique and feel relatively energized for two to three hours after stopping. I am not speaking about huge excess energy like before fin, but feeling relaxed physically and mentally with enough energy to spare.

This effect doesnt always work. Occassionally (15%) I feel just as fatiqued afterwards.

4. Meet with friends and laugh

This is very important and I dont do it enough. Having a good time with friends reduces stress and again prevents PFS from impacting more of your life than strictly necessary. I.e.: If you let PFS to also take away your friends, you have allowed it to impact your life more than necessary.

5. Regular and lots of sleep.

6. Support the foundation and studies

It is my opinion that everyone should set up a monthly donation to the PFS foundation with their bank. Even if its a small amount.

Future Plans:
I plan to improve my diet in the future. Continue improving on the stuff I listed above.

Good Luck to All

1 Like
#19

Congratulations on your attitude. We are similar in many things. I think you are in the (same as I do) right way and I am at a very good point now. Keep fighting and go for those diet improvements, there is light.

#20

"6. Support the foundation and studies

It is my opinion that everyone should set up a monthly donation to the PFS foundation with their bank. Even if its a small amount."

Great point!! Everyone who is working and has a regular income should donate at least $10 a month to the Foundation. All these small amounts add up and show the Foundation there is interest in their work.