Hi guys - I hope this is the right place, but I’m feeling horrible today. Spent ages looking at suicide methods if I’m honest, but I’m not doing that.
Dear fucking lord PLEASE someone cure this.
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Sorry to hear that @jinstewart.
I thought you were doing well, based on your topic.
Is there something in particular that you’re feeling overwhelmed by?
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Thanks Greek - just the outlook and the enormity of it all. I was just so “OK” before this. Weightlifting, Muay Thai, met an incredible girl, career was “right” and everything was “right” and I took it all for granted.
I’m trying things sure and have some days better than others but I was in no way prepared at 36 years old for a life like THIS.
I just don’t know what to do, I’ve spent a lot of the weekend in tears and the horror of it all gets to me sometimes.
Thank you though, you’ve always come in to help when I start losing the battle.
Today I just had similar thougths. Im about the same age at 38 and going through the same things in my head. Its good thing you can cry I think, because for example I cant. Nothing feels like nothing. No feelings, no sensations, just unsensitive penis. All day strugling to keep my family and my job, and my life. This situation is so absurd and nobody else dont have any clue what we are dealing with, expect users in this community. We just have to stick together and support each other cos no-one else cant do that.
Today I thinked this situation a lot. I thinked that if I could turn my mind in to this kind of mood: When I wake up in the morning, I wake up sick as I always do, I know I’ll be sick but this day is another possibility to progress. I dont know if it helps anyone but think about it. Tomorrow when you wake up, you will be sick but its another possible day to get progress on your healing and you dont want to miss that at any price!
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It’s horendeos mate, it’s a lonely disease I too have times when I contemplate the end. Even though it feels never ending and hopeless at the time it does pass and become bearable. Hang in there think of good things past and present and try to do something to take your mind off. Something mentally challenging does the trick but is hard to do because of the feeling of hopelessness. One day this will be behind you and you will be a stronger person hang on to that thought
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Good lord guys thanks so much. I hate crumbling like this, we are all such strong and incredible people and none of us deserve this. I really hope every single one of us gets better - tomorrow if we can!
I’ll keep hanging on however I can. Even if that means falling apart for all of you on here to pick me up.
Thank you all so so so much.
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PSSD/PFS seem like a sine wave to me. There are horrible moments but you have to wait out it and it becomes bearable.
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You saying this really stuck out to me, and it’s something that I ruminate on a lot too. With that being said though, I want to remind you that there absolutely still exists the potential for things to return to normal, or even be better, in the future. I know it may sound redundant or even cheesy, but it can become very hard to remember this when your thoughts are clouded with negativity.
Also, I’m not too sure how frequently you visit the forum, but in the past I’ve found that taking a short break to recenter all of my concerns and thoughts back onto myself to be very helpful. What I mean by that is that sometimes it is very easy to get caught up in all the problems everyone else is having. That is not to say that they are not important or should not be of any concern to you, but it is to say that it is important to ensure that you’re healthily handling the issues that you’re personally facing too, and sometimes realigning your focus is what it takes. Also limiting the amount of time a day I spend on the forum helps too.
I want to say thank you though for reaching out instead of doing otherwise. It’s important for all of us to stick together, and although I don’t know anyone here in person and I don’t post too often, I feel such a strong connection with everyone here. I really hope things are looking up for you now, and always feel free to send a PM if you’d like. I’d hope that everyone here feels like they can PM anyone whenever they’d feel the need for support.
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