Nearly recovered after 4 months, crashed again on Kratom

Symptoms
#1

I had my original crash 4 months ago and since then I very nearly recovered, my only symptoms up until last Tuesday was no libido and dry skin. I’ve been taking kratom for the past 4 months too with no complications up until last Tuesday when I took a large dose at night(which is normal) and felt very weird, later that night I crashed again, full panic attack, shrunken genitals. I did manage to fall asleep that night and thought I was in the clear, but I’ve since come down with extreme anxiety, anhedonia, etc. It’s only been 4 days but I’m freaking out thinking I might’ve really hurt my chances of recovery

#2

Weirdly my face is better since the crash, my skin is producing oil again and it seems to have regained some color. I’m taking it as a good sign but this anxiety is killing me

#3

It might not even be the kratom. Crashes commonly start after eating something, anything. In my experience anyway

#4

Lots to unpack here I’ll keep it concise

  1. You can’t know if you are nearly recovered when you’re taking something as potent as Kratom every day. If you’re nearly recovered you should feel great without needing Kratom.
  2. Nobody should be taking Kratom every day, I’m surprised you didn’t have a crash sooner. The anhedonia you’re experiencing is likely because the Kratom either stopped working or your body has run out of what it needs to make Kratom work because you’ve been using it every day. Tolerance can build with it just like it can coffee.

I would stay away from stimulants and things that force the brain to work unless you absolutely need it for a one off situation, it will hurt you in the long run.

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#5

I was a heavy kratom user when I crashed myself, I haven’t tried it again since and because of still being crash prone I don’t want to try again even though I still get phantom cravings now and then even post withdrawal. I don’t doubt it was part of what made my case as severe as it was. I cold turkey’d off a very high dose in a panic and the compounding withdrawal with what was already happening really messed me up. There was nothing that I could do to stop the insomnia and shakes after I quit that got even worse in bed. I vaped indica CBD like a madman but no amount could touch it and only served to make everything worse somehow. CBD in general only worsened the anhedonia so I dropped that too. Lasted almost a week with the most extreme withdrawal symptoms and I was only able to get sleep when I inevitably just passed out at some point for a short time.