Yes, it’s merely our personalities differ. I’m desperate to help these people and rectify the medical and scientific casualties and neglects that caused this, and you’re not sharing too much - you have simply “cured” and not offered a whole lot beyond GHB’s indication and relevance in our situations. I credit paulwaters and yourself for elevating consciousness about that. But, like I said, I’m here for good. No offense intended by my statements or implications.
And, additionally, you never had ED from finasteride, just the poor sleep/brain fog and (I’m assuming here) anxiety, adrenal-related? Not sure if you posted blood tests. So that plays a role in why you’re not around - you never needed to figure out how to cure sexual dysfunction/shrinkage, and don’t know how yourself.
Nice to hear from you though.
I would like to quickly update on my status and offer a clear warning and make everyone aware of something (that part comes later)…
I really wanted to sleep about 9 - 10 hrs after being awake and feeling blissful, expressive, etc. When this happened it was directly after my last post - I began to feel mild craps in my back, but certainly, my brain was telling me “you should definitely rest”. I couldn’t though, I had to retrieve my mother from the airport.
So like I said, cramps began to occur… but they are twin cramps at the base of my back. Ironically where the adrenals should be. It is easily mistaken for mere muscle cramps, but I know I can feel something happening internally. Hyperplasia or atrophy perhaps. All I know is that I definitely find the adrenals suspect in this crime, and see how a GABA analogue (GHB, Phen, etc) can be useful in restoring that - if it were the source, or a source, of this issue. But I suspect multiple areas of aggravation and dysfunction in the body glandular system.
I’m so bloody tired…need some sleep. I won’t even need the Phenibut, and this part is critical… I am potentially experiencing hyper-vigilance. Hypervigilance isn’t a medical term, it’s something I initially used to describe how I felt while on finasteride - the anxiety (though I don’t feel too anxious now)… makes a lot of sense if this IS adrenal fatigue/Addisson’s, but without doc’s being competent when you see 'em, how the hell should I know
I’m rapid now, but mainly - I believe - only because when I wanted to sleep I had to pull into high gear again. The good news is that I CAN pull into high gear, and the bad news is that I over-did it, and I seem to be (speculatively) swimming in catecholamines ATM.
And it is some bad news (I ofc don’t mind, but still)… when I am this stressed, I’m not feeling good. I’m not feeling sexually capable - at least as much as I should be. It’s rather a “wired” feeling, like the typical coke addict (minus the idiocy required to abuse cocaine). I would not use coke to defeat brain fog though, ever (looking at you boston 
). I never have and never will.
But yes, my lower back is hurting and it feels like there are two balls subtly being squeezed back there. This is a relevant point of this post, and I’ll keep my eye on this.
When I pull down my pants, while I’m feeling good (recent), my penis isn’t hypoxic and retracted as much as it one was. It has a fleshy structure and hangs rather normally, despite the thinning which will take some time to reverse I expect. My balls did see a change this morning, however now, they feel a bit swollen as before and slightly hanging. What I need is good rest, I believe tomorrow they will be better.
Tonight, I don’t intend to take much. 1 - 1.5g (I initially intended to take 2g). I don’t need it for relaxation…it is not as potent a tranquilizer in the sense of a benzo or GHB. It simply makes you feel content and may improve mood while on it. However, as I view this as a continuing treatment rather than something to do just for immediate relief, I will just bring the Phen use down. It may be that I need to lower the dosage slowly to avoid excess dopaminergic withdrawls (self-note: is there any data on this, or any, GABA analogue’s mechanistic cause of DA rush or DA rush via withdrawl?). But I haven’t felt very badly during these times - mild, occasional shakes, but rare. So I am not stating that the “withdrawl” (and I presume this counts as withdrawl - 24 hours off the latest use) has become unbearable, dangerous, or causing me any problems. Further I insist that this concern may have been triggered by excess stress, which post-Phen treatment, I hope will not make for too much DA, but simply, enough. Yeah…it makes sense that my adrenals may be exhausted and need longer-term healing, something good sleep may boost.
MEW - I want to point something out (&, of course, I am glad to hear your kind words). The matter of psychosomaticism in my case is easily construed with using emotional catharsis and thoughts to stimlate and cause the release of neurochems and receptors that were dormant before introducing Phenibut into my body. So, what you may have been referring to as psychosomaticism (I think you mean overall - that I’m just “telling myself I’m okay and it’s happening”, but anyway) is exactly the “mental muscles” you need to make use of again to get the hormonal, and sexual benefits. When I think about sex and fucking I get excited and thrilled in my mind, and it is stimulating a sexual response. This response will take time to restore as it requires hormones to be back online, and my balls need rest - I assume - to rebuild. That is my working assumption.
I hope my post wasn’t too long guys. I am sorry if I threw in excess words there - I’m still moderately doped out, somewhat stressed (from having to push myself), and my mind is riding the high. So I can become verbose. WPM goes up etc.
Thank you all for your patience and kindness in this endeavor. I believe restful, restorative sleep is a good treatment, and will not stop at every exit along this road to recovery to write novels about my progress. Just what’s relevant from now on. Thank you for reading, and good night.
