My performances now don’t have the same feeling or joy in them. I just play the notes and get nervous on stage for no reason. I used to kill it and get so much dopamine when performing.
Even when practicing or listening I don’t feel music anymore. Sad shit.
Man, sorry to hear that. I also play the piano, and my technique has also gotten worse. However, for me, music is one of the few things I can still enjoy.
I found that music is something which I didn’t really enjoy for a time, but that has been coming back with time.
I’m not sure I have any motor skill issues (I assume this is at the heart of the instrument problem) but I would expect it to be recoverable.
I play guitar, a lot. During PFS, I lost interest, and just wasn’t enjoyable. This is my bro science advice: Try smoking weed. It really helped me connect back to music.
im trying to learn programming; its basically impossible since I just feel blank about it. I think that libido is the underlying substrate for desire/passion, without libido you will feel blank/neutral about everything. Also my memory is kind of shitty too, this also greatly impacts my ability to be decent at programming. I can definitely relate with what you say with regards to playing the piano
It’s not directly related to libido in my opinion, but rather the androgen receptors in the brain are a requirement for properly functioning cognitive and creative thinking ability.
yeah but that doesnt explain my general anhedonia. I dont feel completely blank but I rarely feel passionate about anything; I suspect this is connected with the fact that I have zero libido as well. Im referring to the “desire” component, not the cognitive component that you’re referring to
Yeah it is connected. Androgen receptors are responsible for both libido and senses of europhoria and passion in the brain. Sorry if I’m being a bit confusing.
It’s not the receptors, it’s the libido as @skorpio88 is saying. May write more about it one day.
would love to hear your take on it
The receptors are responsible for both the low libido and emotional blunting. Two different issues have the same underlying cause. I’m talking about from a biological point of view.
I understand what you are saying but I disagree.
The brain is where the most dense androgen receptors are in the entire body. How you can call emotional blunting just a psychological issue due to no libido is beyond me. In theory you could have no libido and still have a fun life with motivation, like most castratos were. But our problem is different clearly.
I will explain but not now. It would require understanding the nature of emotions. I am working on a paper about it, which I may or may not ever finish. If I do, I will write about it here.
Man, same here. I am a classical pianist for living. Being on stage used to give me an extreme joy and excitement. I was able to memorize a whole Beethoven’s Sonata and piano concertos after only a few times of reading notes. My memory was so sharp and never ever failed me. It doesn’t work the way it used to anymore. I recently started working on a Bach piano concerto and realized I just can’t memorize a single page no matter how hard I’m trying to concentrate. Also when i perform a very high tempo pieces it’s like my brain jerks and I can’t get the flow and smoothness. This is damn nightmare.
I feel you other Muso’s out there man, and it’s like you can’t talk to anyone in your band or anything about it. It’s like you don’t feel the notes the same way you once did and this ofcourse will change the way you play. Memorising new songs or melodies has been harder for me too. I found the only thing that helped me in the past was a hangover day- brain and L-tyrosine ( 500-1000mg morning of the gig) these two would bring my emotions back into my performance … Although most days I just don’t feel the music whilst performing gigs these days. For this reason I am actually going to start another business ( something I would have never done before- because it was always only music that I wanted to do ) but now it’s like the music part of my brain has diminished and now I’m seeking out other new ventures too. It’s strange. But I feel you muso’s out there - you guys don’t suffer alone!!