Living With Fear

Coping
#1

Pre PFS

There’s a more honest life than the one we’ve been living.

Sometimes we’d rather be angry, we’d rather be scared and remain trapped by our own fears.

Instead of fighting within our minds, we can choose to accept the fear. Embrace it. That’s when something new opens up. On the other side of your fears is a new moment in life just sat there waiting for you.

To step through that darkness you can see beyond your own delusions and find a sense of relief.

Changing job, moving house, making new friends, changes in personal circumstances it can be whatever causes you fear. It’s your experience. It’s your opportunity. It’s your chance to feel the freedom you feel when you move past fear. Go live that honest life that sits within you, that’s sits within us.

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” C.G. Jung

What if we’d just accepted the fear of going bald, what’s the worst thing that could have happened to you? Can you be honest with yourself and with us?

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#2

What’s done is done mate. I wasn’t even particularly worried about my hair when i decided to take a single pill of finasteride that landed me here, my head was already shaved years ago, it was just sitting in my dresser for years and i took it. Admittedly i cared allot the earlier years when i first got the prescription. My life would have been sailing on like it was, really was so privileged, everything is different now. The worst thing that would have happened? Fuck nothing really, occasionally feeling jealous or a touch insecure, regular stuff that everyone deals with. Worrying about hair! Jesus you don’t realise what you’ve got until it’s gone i suppose.

Allot of us, me included, likely fell into the trap of hanging on internet forums, listening to people on the internet and just generally living in our heads about something that is completely trivial in comparison to any serious health issue. We should’ve all just embraced it and accepted it, that’s what my folks told me when i was a teenager, but i was too stupid to see beyond myself and take time to realise how simple and obvious it would have been to just move on with my life. I often think about my friends that i’ve got the most respect for. I ruminate on the fact that i know they would never take such a stupid vanity fuelled risk that we all took. Even now with PFS i’m probably doing the same thing, obsessing making it worse than it needs to be. Fuck. Life is full of traps people fall into drugs, abuse, destructive thought patterns there’s a million different ways to fuck yourself up. I won’t lie though a hair loss drug landing me in this position really stings.

I feel cheated, I feel like i’ll never forgive myself at the same time and i’m just so disappointed that this is where my decisions have led me. All that being said beating ourselves up is not sustainable and we all gotta find a way to live alright.

Also sorry just realised this doesn’t really answer your question! lol just needed to vent.

How about you man where would you be without PFS?

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#3

I think you answered the question a few points up.

I’d probably be training in the gym. Was thinking of setting up my own YouTube fitness channel back when they weren’t so popular. Id be socialising more and found myself a girl. I’d be working and have my own family. Then I’d settle for everyday life, spending nights on the sofa watching TV with my partner, reading books to better myself. Probably a bunch of other things but I took pleasure in the simple stuff. I felt being healthy, having a loving relationship, my own home and a decent job pretty much ticked most boxes to happiness.

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#4

Living with fear hmmm, I can relate to that. I’ve also socialised allot less, been less willing to engage with people as myself (less open) and spend allot of my days not as productively as I would like. My mum said to me the other day that i haven’t been myself for 6 months which was a bit depressing. PFS may be changing my career path as well, strongly considering dropping out of medical school might need to pursue something more laid back, maybe it’s for the best who knows. What you just painted as a life sounds pretty ideal to me as well Andrew, plus maybe a few late night beers hanging with my friends couple nights a week :slight_smile:

We can’t be too hard on ourselves though, what we’re going through is extremely difficult, almost feels dehumanising in a way to have some of our bodily functions essentially stripped stripped from us. It’s understandable you’re living differently after going through all this pain because you’re not the exact same person anymore. People deal with similar feelings/circumstances in different contexts often, maybe we need to take a leaf out of their book.

Have hope bud I’m sure you can full-fill some of those ideas.

#5

You have empathy and can analyse life. Perhaps consider being a psychotherapist. Low stress as you can get. Probably learn an awful lot about yourself.

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