I don't know what to do

Coping
#1

I’ve been managing mentally for the past week since my 11 month crash back to impotence. It’s now 11pm on a Wednesday night and I’m sat alone in my room on this forum…scared about the future once again

My penis is lifeless and my testicles have gone back to being extremely droopy. This sends me into a spiral of bad thoughts everytime I look at them. Is this my permenant baseline? Will I always return here? Or ever escape?

I can’t stop reading this forum and searching for any signs of hope. There aren’t many cases like mine. I’ve read over 50k posts and I’m disgusted at myself for doing so.

During the day I have distraction at work and with my fiance, but when it comes to night time, I spend it all on this forum until my eyes actually hurt. I feel like I need to be on this forum searching for a way out, no matter how futile. I’m aware how pointless this is and keep telling myself to stop… but I can’t.

I’m sorry to bring so much negativity to the forum, but I have no one to talk to about this. I’m trying to be strong for my fiance and pretend like everything will be okay, when I cannot be sure it will be. I’m worried my suicidal thoughts will come back. I’m just so alone in this hell and need someone to talk to. No one else understands. It’s painful, as well as humiliating.

I know false hope is not helpful, but it seems like the only thing that my mind is trying to latch onto right now. I feel I’m coming close to breaking point once again.

Once again, I apologize for adding more negativity to the forum. I just needed to say this to anyone who would understand instead of bottling it up.

Wishing you guys all the best. God bless.

#2

I can understand you much to good. I have lost my stuning girlfriend WHO came Back to me for Love and Sex and I offerd her ED. After two months in Finistarid. With No friend I can talk about. Day and night I hang in Here to reconfirm that I m Not the only one who was so ugly fucked from live. The only luck god has me given is that I was hurt with 59. So only 20 years of sex and Lustvfor live has been stolen. Not a whole live. But becoming the Crash with the one of my Dreams ist Death Penalty.

In my Dreams WE all life together in a big Community Like an old toscanien Monestsry and give us Love and Peace an some women with helper Syndrom come across without distressing us…

#3

To help your mental health, could you maybe try restricting the amount of time you spend on the forum to say an hour, then stop, and also try and take a break from checking your genitals as they will be whatever they will be, irrespective of whether you check them out or not? The action of checking them out will no doubt be contributing to this cycle of despair, although I completely get why you’re doing so. I know that it’s difficult, but trying to divert yourself may help your mood.

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#4

Let the people Talk about their pain. I Talk that I lost my stuning girlfriend, again and again. IT IS my Nightmare, the pill ended Up scwild Love an Sex Affair. Others Nightmare is the shrunken Penis. WE are Here to Talk about Out injured Soul, about the bravness and the manhood WE lost.

WE are broken WE Need each other to be unlimited, to Open Up our injured Souls.

#5

Yeah, distracting myself is the way to go, although easier said than done. I just woke up and re-read what I wrote and felt quite stupid for getting so emotional. I guess it just got to me last night. Thanks for your practical advice mate.

1 Like
#6

Sorry about your pain, my friend. I hope you bounce back and get your life back soon too

#7

Certainly don’t feel stupid for feeling emotional. It is entirely understandable. If you can’t safely sound off here, then where can you sound off? We’ve all been there.

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#8

I’m singing from the same hymn sheet. I was only responding if focussing on the situation was making it even worse. I’ve been there myself, but of course this forum is a space for all of us to express ourselves freely and get things off our chests. It’s just sometimes some of us find that there can be a component which makes us feel more despairing when looking at some of what has been for the moment damaged, but of course I also acknowledge the immense therapeutic aspect of sharing our suffering. As John Lennon once said, “Whatever gets you through the night…”. That’s all that matters.

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#9

I took the pill Just in Feb. 2021 Without checking the Internet. Crashed with a Woman in Easter this year and I m totaly new in my psf Live. An I feel transformated to a Zombie an feel ashamed and get total wiered about all. Hope to bounce Back my live too.

#10

Everyone here is deep inside the innerst of my injured soul. AS you…