Wait, are you Mitch? Wasn’t you healed? Jesus Christ, this really killed the last fragment of hope that I had
I’m not sure where I said I was healed. I’ve improved for sure though.
Well, I remember posts of yours from lots of years ago (as Mitch) saying you were almost healed by lifestyle, liver detox, thyroid armour, etc. Saw you didn’t login here for a long while.
I just thought that it was because you were fully fine, since you were almost like this like 15 years ago. Sad for you and us all. And hope we can get there someday
I think that’s another Mitch my dude. I haven’t had PFS for 15 years.
Well, I’m very confused lol. But I’m referring to this one here @Mitch . Don’t know if it’s the same or not, but sorry for the misunderstanding
Ah yeah, that’s a different guy. Sorry you’re not doing too well at the moment man. Let me know if you’d like to speak over a call.
Is there any skill you could learn in order to have a lucrative career after recovery in a few years? Do you have average or higher intelligence so you could learn how to code or do data science? These are skills best learned at home on a computer anyway and are very lucrative. It’s trite, but a great way to handle lemons is to turn them into lemonade. The future of education is online anyway. There will not be overpriced universities anymore. You can take online classes with Coursera and edX, get great at something, and surge ahead of all the people using tinder, chasing skirt, hanging out and watching Netflix these days. Once you recover you will be in a better position than if you had never gotten PFS in the first place.
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I like this
You haven’t been back for a while, brother, are you still with us? Maybe you’ve been recovering? Fill us in…
I’m in my fourth year of prolonged torture, and back at that two year mark I would not have believed it would hang on. But it has, daily bouts of exhaustion and brain fog.
I want to quit the battle; I think about it daily. Some nights I retire wondering if I’ll awaken the next day. Then I do, and I put one foot in front of the other and slog through another day. Maybe tomorrow I’ll feel better, even a little bit. Hope springs eternal.
Check in, update us. Keep fighting! Jim
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Hey man
I’m still here, unfortunately my situation has not improved. I wish I could come back with positive news. I’m kind of just existing right now, like a robot if you will. I’m managing to work full time, but I’m dragging myself everyday and it sucks seeing how low energy I am compared to my colleagues. The mental state while I’m working is just weird. I work in customer service and I notice my cognitive decline is affecting my work alot. I’ve kind of just accepted that this is permanent. Last night though I started crying before bed, tear after tear. I don’t know what happened. I wasn’t even thinking about anything. I wish I was dead, I’m not living I’m just existing.
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@ruinedlife
So good to hear from you again! The daily struggles you describe echo what so many of us experience. It’s despicable that merck goes unpunished.
I see you’ve written your member story! I’ll move over there for further comment. Jim
I completely understand all of your words as I’ve abs all have felt the exact same way man.
I know it’s awful
But you mustn’t think it’s permanent
Things are moving abs happening
Let that guide you to better thoughts. Or at least let it be a catalyst for more positive thinking
Give it some more time. You may very start to feel better bit by bit
Keep going strong. You must man
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@ruinedlife
@JimWildman
AFAIK, many recoveries happened even after a long time of no progress with the condition, in other words, recovery may be actually around the corner and you don’t even know it (that being said, I would still reccomend a healthy life style regardless), nobody really knows with this disease.
It’s an interesting phenomenon to study IMO, how your body just switches one day and starts to drastically reverse epigenetic changes or something.
Just stay strong for now, if you manage to keep on living as you are right now, when you eventually get better it will be as if a weight has lifted and you will be unstoppable, or at least just very happy; for me personally, the fact that I can heal is mainly what keeps me going forward.
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Thanks for the positive encouragement. I do agree with everything you say, just holding on for the moment and yes just the thought of suddenly recovering is what keeps me going too. I try to say away from environments which remind me of my sexual sides, so work is the only place where I feel some relief. Wish you the best🫶🏽
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Thanks for the encouragement. I have to say that one thing I do notice which is very strange, I will get a warm sensation in different parts of my body very rarely. Like today I suddenly felt a rush of warm for a few seconds in the right side of my chest area. I have gotten it in one of my ears, my quad and my feet etc, but very rare. It kind of reminds me of the feeling where people who crashed said they felt a warm sensation as if androgens were coming back, then they crashed. It’s a very unique feeling and I have never experienced anything like this before. It really makes me wonder what kind of mechanism is at play here. Just wanted to note that maybe somebody have experienced/is experiencing the same. In case I recover it might be useful. Again, your supportive message is much appreciated, thank you and I wish you the best pal.
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I think about this every day, more so in the past month or 2. Stay away from SSRIs. I improved a lot over the course of 3 years, but I fucked myself by taking Lexapro and Buspar. I’m not sure what you can use for anxiety and depression but just stay away from those drugs.
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I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you see some improvements again soon. It’s crazy how every little thing now wreaks havoc in the body. Praying for you man.
L-Theanine, valerian, ashwagandha, tyrosine, 5htp. I’m sure there are other anti anxiety and depressent supplements like rhodiola and St John’s wort but I have not tried these.
I just went out today with a couple of mates and decided to have one drink, just one. Short time after I start to feel some weird movement in my scrotum, which makes me start obsessing over what is going and I completely zone out. I decide to go home because I realise I will just act weird if I stay. When I get home, my balls are all atrophied, just like when I crashed. Honestly, I’m so done. I can’t stay positive, not without some sort of hope. I just cannot believe that I’m in this situation, like it is for real, this is my life now. I know I made some stupid mistakes, but what kind of weak shitty genetics do I have that my body can’t recover from this? Now I’m here ranting, pointless. Sorry guys, I have tried to stay away from this forum because I don’t want to spread negativity like this, but if anyone, you guys are the ones that understand how overwhelming this shit can be. I’ll try to get some sleep, maybe I’ll wake with a more positive outlook. I love you all, the only place where I don’t feel alone,
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Don’t be too hard on yourself man. It’s not your fault or that of your body that you’re in this condition. You were poisoned by an incredibly shitty and evil drug that should never have been created in the first place. It’s all very overwhelming, but you must find hope in the fact that as a community we are now making serious progress. The PFS Network have assembled truly excellent scientists who want to get to the bottom of this and we are now raising more awareness and funds than we have in the past. If you would like to help get involved we’d love to have you with us. Until then, take care and I hope things are better when you wake.
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