I am very angry at my mom for putting my on Prozac at 12 for OCD before I even knew what sex was so by the time I realized they were affecting me I was on them for far too long and when living at home and asked to go off of them she said “I do not care you are not having sex.” I absolutely despise my mom for playing such a major role in me getting severe PSSD. Does anyone have any advice for how they overcome anger towards someone else?
Have you approached her about what happened to you? Has she apologized?
My father demanded I keep taking Accutane because he “spent so much for the prescription” after I started complaining to my parents about fear of it being responsible for me feeling out of sorts. Then he didn’t seem too concerned when I described post-drug (unknown to be related to Accutane at the time) sexual symptoms to him as “being afraid I wouldn’t be able to have children anymore.” At least an unhelpful doctor appointment resulted from that conversation. Never forgave him after 20 years, but it’s not as if I ever addressed it directly and asked for an apology.
Ruminating, anger, irritability etc are 24/7 PFS symptoms for some, me included. All they do is hurt and isolate you further.
Relaxation, mindfulness, forgiveness, distraction, mentally challenging stuff, new experiences
See through the eyes of an angel, everything will be bright, light and beautiful. Try to break it. Good luck
I can understand your anger. I think that talking to your mum about it may be helpful, although I appreciate that any conversation can be difficult when you are feeling such strong emotions and that she may also be defensive. I think that it may be useful however that she knows the full extent of what has happened. It’s a very difficult thing when someone close is involved in a decision which subsequently causes harm. I started to take finasteride in my twenties and although my memory can be not so good, and although my memory of when I first started still isn’t great, recently I got more of a clear picture of it in that my dad was probably the driving force in actually sitting at his computer and ordering it for me with him filling in the online form as if he was the patient. These more recent memories of the time (if I have remembered correctly) is of dad brushing off concerns due to the fact that it like so many medications had been approved so they must be safe. I took a passive role and was kind of swept along and I’m not sure if I would have made that decision if it was purely my own decision. Dad was probably coming from the place of having lost his hair at a young age himself and remembering the experience and wanting me to avoid that. He is now more than aware of how much finasteride has negatively impacted my life in bearing witness to me emotionally breaking down. Im my case I feel that any issues this memory flags up are mine alone to deal with as dad has been through enough and is in his late seventies. As I’ve said he is aware of the consequences and of course he did it with my own interest at heart. It does however highlight maybe a dynamic of our relationship over the years which might not have been for the best. Unlike yourself however I was an adult (although I suppose that we are always children when it comes to our parents). Your own story is a lot more explicit in terms of responsibility when you were a child. I don’t know whether it would be helpful if you were to say to your mum that you are experiencing a lot of anger towards her because of her decision but to do it in a way whereby you ascribe it as an unwanted emotion that you don’t want to feel so as you kind of put some distance between the emotion and you as a person. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I can understand in some way how you are feeling and can understand how you can be left with anger with that awareness that someone you love has inadvertently caused you harm and that whole “if only”. I wish you all the best in hopefully finding some healing.
You try to avoid thinking about it often. That’s how you do it.
I’m still pissed about this and my hair loss. I blame my parents for it, idiots having kids with baldness in the family pisses me off.
I’m angry at my parents for putting me on Roaccutane as a 14 year old. I don’t know if I will ever forgive them. I think it’s perfectly valid to be angry over this. Perhaps forgiveness is possible but I think it has to be a two-way street - one of my parents continues to evade taking any responsibility for the decision, in my eyes this makes it impossible to even begin to forgive.
I completely understand and that is yours and all of our rights to be angry. Although it doesn’t make the situation better, it is however part of the grieving process for us so to speak.
Something that might help a little bit is knowing, and I’m sure this is the case for all parents, if they had known full well what the repercussions were…and not some “oh side effects will disappear after discontinuation blah blah blah” I mean they FULLY knew what it would be like…I’m sure they’d never let you get within 100 feet of that stuff or anything like it.
No parent would do this to their child willingly. And my guess is any parent that can’t accept even some responsibility is because of the immense guilt they feel.
I’m not making excuses I’m just saying what I think it is.
These drugs were suppose to help us. Not hurt is.
Who could’ve seen this coming
I get that and it’s a true on a level, but I think it’s a bit more complicated. They still could’ve known enough about Roaccutane to realise giving it to their healthy, young, still-developing son was a terrible idea. It is hard for me to not see their decision as in some sense an act of violence against me, especially in the context of our family dynamics - I won’t bore you with the details.
People will say, well, parents do this all the time, unreflectingly dosing their healthy children up with very harmful drugs because that’s what the doctor ordered. But just because it’s a commonplace doesn’t make it any more excusable. Of course parents don’t bear all the responsibility, of course they are duped by Pharma - but to the extent that they allow themselves to be duped, as far as I am concerned they are responsible.
So in answer to your question: who could see it coming? Anyone who cares enough about protecting the health and physical integrity of their child to look and learn. All the information is out there for those with eyes to see.