FUCK MERCK - 15 Months - 85% Recovery - My Journey towards the LIGHT

Welcome to our community. Please fill in the following template as a way of introducing yourself, and helping others to understand your background and situation.

Where are you from (country)?

How did you find this forum (Google search – if so, what search terms? Via link from a forum or website – if so, what page? Other?)


What is your current age, height, weight?

24 5’11 170lb

What specific drug did you use (finasteride, dutasteride, saw palmetto, isotretinoin/Accutane, fluoxetine, sertraline, citalopram, leuprorelin, etc…)?

Fin and Min

What dose did you take (eg. 1 mg/day, 1 mg every other day etc.)?

3mg total over the course of 3 weeks

What condition was being treated with the drug?


For how long did you take the drug (weeks/months/years)?

3 weeks on and off

Date when you started the drug?


Date when you quit the drug?

2020 dec
Age when you quit?


How did you quit (cold turkey or taper off)?


How long into your usage did you notice the onset of side effects?


What side effects did you experience that have yet to resolve since discontinuation?

ED and Penile sensitivity

Check the boxes that apply. You can save your post first, then interactively check/uncheck the boxes by clicking on them. If your symptoms change, please update your list.

[ x] Loss of Libido / Sex Drive
[x ] Erectile Dysfunction
Complete Impotence
Loss of Morning Erections
[x ] Loss of Spontaneous Erections
Loss of Nocturnal Erections
Watery Ejaculate
Reduced Ejaculate
Inability or Difficulty to Ejaculate / Orgasm
Reduced Sperm Count / Motility

Emotional Blunting / Emotionally Flat
Difficulty Focusing / Concentrating
Memory Loss / Forgetfulness
Stumbling over Words / Losing Train of Thought
Slurring of Speech
Lack of Motivation / Feeling Passive / Complacency
Extreme Anxiety / Panic Attacks
Severe Depression / Melancholy
Suicidal Thoughts

Penile Tissue Changes (narrowing, shrinkage, wrinkled)
Penis curvature / rotation on axis
Testicular Pain
Testicular Shrinkage / Loss of Fullness
[ x] Genital numbness / sensitivity decrease
Weight Gain
Gynecomastia (male breasts)
Muscle Wastage
Muscle Weakness
Joint Pain
Dry / Dark Circles under eyes

Prostate pain
Persistent Fatigue / Exhaustion
Stomach Pains / Digestion Problems
Constipation / “Poo Pellets”
Vision - Acuity Decrease / Blurriness
Tinnitus (ringing or high pitched sound in ears)
Hearing loss
Increased hair loss
Frequent urination
Lowered body temperature

Other (please explain)

What (if any) treatments have you undertaken to recover from your side effects since discontinuation of the drug?

Variety of supplements and cialis.

If you have pre or post-drug blood tests, what hormonal changes have you encountered since discontinuing the drug (please post your test results in the “Blood Tests” section and link to them in your post)?

Anything not listed in the above questions you’d like to share about your experience


  1. Name of the therapy/substance:
    • Dosage:
    • How often you took it:
  2. Status
    • Still using [ ]
    • Stopped with no lasting change to initial symptoms [ ]
    • Stopped with persistent change to symptoms [ ]
  3. Duration of use: Days [ ] Months [ ] Years [ ]
  4. Response when you started:
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]
  5. Current response (if you’re still using the therapy/substance) OR Response in the time before you stopped the treatment
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]
  6. Lasting changes to initial symptoms after cessation (if you have stopped for more than 3 weeks)
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]

Tell us your story, in your own words, about your usage and side effects experienced while on/off the drug.

  • Hey Guys, Finally decided to post my member story.
    Rather than bore you with detials. I will keep this straight to the point and let you ask any questions. I will update this thread regularly

  • Took only 3mg, 15 months since quitting

  • I had a bad crash suffered some mental sides but they went quick

  • I am left with ED and noticeable quite notable sensitivity loss. This is my number 1 most pressing issue

I know there is a certain number of you that are currently reading this & have recovered (especially from those 2 symptoms). Please provide your feedback, help and advice.

Please tell me there is hope.


Thank you for creating a member story @iHATEMerck !



I actually just finished taking a 2 week break from Cialis to assess my baseline.

I can report that my baseline is significantly higher than where it was previously.

Current outstanding sides

  • ED; partially recovered. I can achieve an erection but cannot maintain at full mast without serious stimulation. The main issue here for me is simply BLOODFLOW.If i had more bloodflow regularly to the penis, it would be perfect. this is why Cialis helps in this area so well.
  • Numbness: Still persists but may have gotten 25-35% better. VERY annoying issue. Tactile and erogenous sensitivity is low.
  • Libido: massive improvements, 85% pre-fin levels.

I am now back on Cialis, I believe Cialis is a must just to push me over that “edge” of reaching near full recovery. I notice improvements in all those 3 areas with Cialis and plan to continue staying on. Numerous studies support the benefits of long term Cialis for Penile Health.

1 Like

I am also going to start exercises to RELAX my pelvic floor. I have a feeling this would greatly help my bloodflow issue to the penis because I sense that my pelvic floor is too tight therefore limiting my ability to achieve and MAINTAIN a FULL erection

Can anyone link me to some good threads / resources for relaxing the pelvic floor? Has anyone had success witht his?

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Another update,

Wow, amazing libido. Really happy with the recent improvements in this regard
As mentioned previously, the final missing key for me is sensitivity.

Cialis = 90-95% Recovery. Without Cialis = 80-85%
The only added issue i (think) I have without cialis is maintaining an erection at full mast.

The reason why i said i think is because i havent tested it in a real sex scenario just yet. all sexual encounters , ive have had cialis.
I believe with consistent stimulation I am able to stay erect.

The above reason is why definitely have to start relaxing pelvic floor ASAP