I’ve never hated myself more than i do today my life is ruined because of this hellish condition please pray for me i don’t know what to do
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I’ll pray for you friend.
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Thank you for that
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keep it up, life has other beautiful sides. There will be better times for us all.
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This too shall pass…this strong feelings of regret and hate towards yourself and your situation are mighty at times but they do pass
When you become more sober minded you always seem to realize you’d rather stay and be strong
That’s what you need to do for yourself
Stay the course, stay strong
BE stronger than this condition
You don’t know what the future will bring
Be here to see it
Life can still be beautiful despite how things seem at the moment
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Every time i try to pray and be positive i fail and i just remember how ruined iam
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Believe and try to stay strong. We were not meant to suffer like this. Better times lie ahead. The extremes eventually pass. Never give up hope my Friend. Things could change for the better no one knows. .I’ll include you in my prayers 
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Thank you i appreciate that
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Brother I know it is not easy. For nobody. But have faith and don’t let this poison ruin your mental health. You have to stay with us we can make it through it, no doubts!
Stress is a important fact in our recovery. The stress will slow our recovery!
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Your right this stress and worrying has taken my life over this is all i can think of i read posts here about people recovering and it gives me some hope that one day ill be healed in full
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The recovery will happen to us all, we have to strengthen our mentality and reduce the stress first. After that our body will have more energy to work with this disease. Our mind can be a trigger for more symptoms.
I will give you a example from my experience:
Almost 2 years ago I had unprotected sex with a girl I met in my vacations. First I did not even think about the risks. After a while I saw something in TV regarding to HIV. And i swear to everything on earth I had almost all the symptoms! Moreover I had the worst symptoms, night sweat. I never had something like that! I had it for a few weeks until I made a test. It was negativ and after this day everything, all my symptoms were gone!
Long story short: Reduce your stress, do something, maybe run oder hit the gym. You can also read books or take long walks. It will help.
The mind is very powerful it can make you feel symptoms of a condition you never had or think you have maybe i should get some blood work done to see what hormones are messed up
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Blood check is always good. Just send me a PM if you feel like that again. Have a nice day my friend 
Thanks brother