Do you think complete recovery is possible 5+ years after?

Coping
#1

Im going to ask this question especially for the cases that has been suffering at least for 2-3 years. Im suffering for 5.5 years now and my symptoms got worse and worse. And as a highly aware and obsessive person, i still find new and new things that i lost everyday. I just realized how small my penis tip looks now when erect, before then, it was like a mushroom! I had a very big and strong penis, great sexuality. And i was taller among my friends (at 16). Now all my close friends are at least 2-3cm taller than me.
I had the biggest penis among all my friends, to the point where they did jokes about it. Now, i have narrow shoulders.

I really feel like this drug is even damaged my natural sexual and skeletal growth due to hormonal damage. It could even damaged the growth of my penis. Now my penis looks like a child’s slowly and slowly. After reading many recovery stories, i start to believe that they were all unknowingly tricking themselves. They only got better, like %90 and claimed 100% recovery. Why? Because after living with PFS/PAS all those years, they forget how things SHOULD really be. Even i forget it. Keep in mind that im a mild case in contrary to people here.

I don’t remember my actual penis size
I don’t remember how hard my erections were
I don’t remember how good an orgasm was
I don’t remember how good it felt even when i take a piss
I don’t remember the sensivity of my penis
I don’t remember how exciting it was to watch a porn

Worst thing is, i got SLOWLY worse, so there wasn’t enough instant changes for me to actually realize what i have lost! I don’t remember any changes on my penis in the first 2 years and then it got slowly worse.

After all these years if i would get better like %90 let’s say. I would probably think that it’s 100%. So, are we telling lies to ourselves? I think this shit is really permanent to some degree.

And the most traumatic thing for me is that this thought: How would i be if i never took this poison. Maybe i would be taller than all of my friends and my penis would be even bigger than pre-pas which that would be insanely good… we had an amazing miracle body and we chemically destroyed it… I can’t hardly satisfy a woman with my new thin, softer penis. I really don’t want to live like this anymore.

If 110% recovery is REALLY possible, i can live with this hope and try things. But even if i recover i would always have this trauma: Did accutane damage my natural growth? Penis growth? Skeletal, structural growth? Would my chin look bigger and more manly if i never took this drug? Etc…
…

Who can answer these questions for us? No one.

Here is a few possibilities that we have to face with:

  • For those who took these drugs before 21, it did really impaired your possible, natural growth and health in all aspects. It’s up to your “luck”.
  • 110% recovery is really possible.
  • 110% recovery is not possible, only up to %90.
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#2

And the killer in this disease is, if 100 doctors would examine you now, they wont be able to find anything wrong with you…Thats the biggest problem…All of these symptoms can be explained as „Psychological“…I hate this disease soooo much…
I don’t remember what living is.

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#3

I’m sorry to hear of the difficulties your condition is bringing you man. It really is the worst of the worst.

The trouble is that nobody really knows the answer to your question. Without understanding the pathology of the problem and the changes that our body has undertaken we can’t really predict how the condition will develop.

Anecdotally, you can see that people make improvements while some people get worse. But the fact of the matter is that we have a medical problem that as of now has no route of official diagnosis and thus no method of treatment.

Generally speaking, serious medical conditions don’t just go away on their own, nor do they improve with taking vitamin and herbal supplements. Our best chance lies with everyone pooling their efforts together to get the bottom of this from a scientific standpoint. If we all do our bit, this can be done.

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#4

You may need to let go of the idea that you ‘are a worrisome and obsessive person’.
You actively obsess over this. You actively worry over this. That’s not part of your DNA or something.

I mean come on, you are worried over the fact that EVEN if you get cured you would still have regrets… Pfff dude, now you’re just actively looking for ways to be depressed.
Everyone obviously has regrets in life, that doesn’t destroy your life forever or something. If you get cured, then you’re cured. That would be absolutely great, and nothing else but great.

I know it’s very hard to let go, I have my bad days too, but you need to start focussing on other important / positive things in your life that are not sex-related. By constantly worrying over your penis size and whether or not your physical traits like your skeleton and whatnot have improved/worsened, you are letting PFS symptoms destroy your life even further than they already have by allowing all this anxiety and panic to change your behavior.

I acknowledge your suffering, and you should always stay hopeful for a recovery. But I think your time and thoughts are better spent focussing on all the other things in life that you can still improve to make your life better. Because you can still be hopeful without worrying obsessively. None of these thoughts you have are productive for yourself or the people in your environment in any way whatsoever.

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#5

Thank you for your responses. @SkinDiesel @Wintermoon
Well yes, if i recover and feel like it is really 100% or even 95% i can move on with my life and close this page forever.
But the thing is, i would never be sure about ‘‘what if i never took this drug’’ thing. I don’t know if it did damage my penis growth, height and hell, maybe even my facial structure. Im only guessing and tell a lie to myself that it did only somehow damaged my prostate tissue, not my whole system since i had only low semen volume issue until 17-18 years old. I didn’t notice any changes on my libido or whatnot.

So i guess i just have to accept whatever happened to me? And try to recover and forget the possible impairment it caused on my body when i was growing up at the age of 16?

#6

You’ll definitely drive yourself crazy if you constantly think “what if I’d never taken this drug”. Every single one of us on this forum has those thoughts and they’re of no use to us whatsoever. Whenever they enter my mind I shut them down immediately. The past can never be changed. The future, though, is up to us.

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#7

I understand. I always know that i need to accep this possible impairment on my growth. I can live with this. I believe in recovery. But i can’t stop thinking about the past. I hardly understand those scientific articles, i wish i had that knowledge to at least make some assumptions whether this mild PAS of mine could have cause such damage or not.

@SkinDiesel, would you say that having only low semen volume as the only obvious symptom in the first years of suffering, could indicate any possible damage to my whole body and sexual growth? I always assumed this:

Low semen= Damaged prostate= Prostate needs proper level of hormones to be healthy= I have low DHT or whatever is going on about the hormones= penis and body grows via hormones and DHT = it did damage my natural health irreversibly to some degree.

I don’t really know how Accutane really acts on the whole body and on the hormones. People think im just crazy assuming 4 pills in total could have cause such damage. Can you give any scientific advices to me as a guidance and help about this? For example, one time Dubya said that for some, our condition may be fixated on some certain tissues like prostate. Therefore, maybe my hormonal system was fine except prostate tissue, and maybe it didn’t damage to other things? What you think?

#8

I really wish I could advise you man but unfortunately I can’t. There’s no homogenous, accepted guideline that allows us to state: this symptom = this problem. Without further scientific investigation we’re just swinging in the dark.

This condition is extremely deceptive in its clinical manifestation too. People regularly present with symptoms that, logically, point to a specific problem/deficiency, but when tested the results return normal.

The only advice I can give to you is be extremely careful what you put in your body and get involved with community projects as much as you can. I know it’s not what you want to hear right now, but it’s the most solid advice you can receive at present.

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#9

No I don’t believe in recovery

I do think there are substances Right now that can help us therapeutically but we need more information from studies To know which ones will help us without killing us

Asides from that, recovery will only happen when we learn completely about this disease

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