This is a post for people with a wife/partner and kid(s). I know for a fact that the damn stress of being married with 2 little ones running around has made things way more difficult in terms of recovery (and often fucks with your sleep). For a while I was doing better, feeling maybe 60% normal, and then the kids got stressful and me and the wife started fighting and I started feeling like shit again. And when I get in a bad mood it’s really horrendous being around people. I see a lot of talk on the board about intense anger, hateful feellings, and I can identify. I do love my kids but when I crash I find I resent my family and it is very hard on my relationship. Anyone have stories to share?
I have a wife and two young kids. At first (right after the initial crash) being around my kids was very stressful, because I had to cover up how shitty and sleep deprived I had become and still act like the same Dad they knew since birth. Add to that the stress of work and not knowing what the future holds. I also put a lot of stress thinking that if I lost my job, I could no longer provide for any of us. Luckily, works pretty manageable most days and that’s become less of a stress.
As for my wife, she has been my rock through this hell since day one. She is very much a positive person, while I’m a worst case scenario person. Without her, I would not be able to make it through the down periods. I’ve cried in front of her more times than i can count since crashing, which makes me feel weak, but she doesnt care. In a way, we’re closer now and talk about things we’ve never discusseed in the past. Just wish it didn’t take this experience to get us here.
Trust me, I know the anger and hate side of all of this, but my family is the most valuable thing I have and what makes it possible for me to keep moving on. Sometimes I just have to overlook how I feel inside and make the most for their sakes, not mine.
Hopefully you and your family come through this situation for the better and that you have some real physical improvements, if not a recovery, as well.
You’re very lucky in that your wife is supportive. Mine thinks everything in life is solved with diet and exercise. You don’t really know who you’ve married until you really get in the shit and see what they’re made of. Certainly the PFS sleep deprivation combined with the kids sleep deprivation is not helpful. I just keep thinking that each month will get a little better.