Can't Catch a Break. I Quit.

General Discussion
#25

Notna - so your basically saying I should stay living with the worst case PFS for the sake of my kids???

You have no fucking idea what I have to live with everyday, your the arsehole for having no understanding of how bad my condition is

I deserve to live happy. I am a zombie 24/7

Just because I have kids makes no difference to how bad I have this and don’t you think I’ve considered them in my plans to end MY life

It’s a choice I’ve decided on

Go live your life if you don’t have PFS as bad as me

You’ve got no idea!

#26

it was your decision to have kids, and i think its the fathers responsibilty to raise them too… this is my opinion and i dont think its morally acceptable. What if their mom did the same? no parent would be left.

#27

Your a fucking Hippocrit

Yes I chose to have kids but I did not chose to have PFS with crippling depression.

I did not chose to spend 3 months in a mental home because of my PFS

You just don’t get it!!!

#28

When you have a seriously bad case of PFS you need to give it two years MINIMUM and probably three to get accustomed to your new life, and also just as importantly allow that time for the worst of the depression, anger and brain fog to go away.

You’re going to be pretty foolish if you top yourself then two years later we get an effective remedy for this. If the Foundation are actually talking about potential therapies then we have to take them at their word that they are in the works.

#29

Dont you feel any responsibility to raise your children? I bet you do…

I would rather be a crippled dad with full blown pfs whos trying his best to raise his kids, than kill myself.

I also think that the mental sides will get better paul…

#30

sorry for coming across harsh ut theres hope paul, keep that in mind

#31

Notna

So you are saying that its ok to kill yourself over PFS if you dont have kids, like Daniel Stewart, Randy Santmann, Patrick Ortiz etc

But its not alright if you are John Pffaf or me?

John Pffaf left two kids behind too, listen to his wife tell the story here…

blogtalkradio.com/pfsglobal/ … affs-story

Notna - when my kids visit me, I often just stare into blank spaces because my brain is 80% dead. Either that or I look at my kids and break down into floods of tears with feelings of guilt for ever taking propecia and putting myself in this situation, either way I am now a poor excuse of a Father, absent whether I’m here living or dead. Perhaps your beggining to understand me more now? You have mild PFS perhaps with issues to do with your jaw changing shape… Go live your life !!!

Luckfax

Part of my problem is that I am not willing to wait 2 to 3 years for a treatment option that may or may not ever come. Every fucking day for me is a real life living nightmare. The longer I put up with this the worse I get. Part of the problem is in what you write. You say I need to give it time to get use to my new life with PFS, well NO !!! I refuse to accept my new life with a tiny shrunken NUMB penis, ZERO libido, crippling depression as well as a whole host of other sexual, mental and physical issues.

Listen, I am worst case scenario and to live like this is pure punishment, so if I chose to end my life, thats my choice. I know the fucking serious harm propecia has brought upon my physical and mental well being and therefore, I have the right to say enough is enough. You are not in my shoes so you have no idea what I have to put up with !!!

1 Like
#32

I’m with THETIGERSHULL. We can’t know what it’s like to walk a single day in another’s shoes. I have groin pain every day and poor libido - that is misery to me, but to someone else here it might be paradise.

I personally won’t judge anyone for how they deal with this crap. If we can’t have empathy and compassion for each other, then can we expect it from others?

#33

It’s your life, do what you want, but I can speak with authority on this as I have had it as bad as anyone you included. You’re not talking to some guy who didn’t suffer every side going so you need to drop the ‘woe is me I’m worse than everyone’ angle.

#34

talking about killing yourself is fucking crazy man,fuck that bullshit,i have suffered for over 6 year and will suffer for the rest of my life if i have to,ive been through worse things before than pfs,yes its pure shite living like this compared to before pfs,but it sure beats being dead,i can think of loads of things i still enjoy doing even though im a sexual zombie etc,this was my life before pfs,taking gorgeous women out at weekends,taking them to hotels where they would lick champagne off my balls,slide up and down on my cock all night etc etc,me layed there feeling like a fucking king,women would call at my house during the week just so they could blow me,life was good and i was loving it,this is my life since pfs,i am now a recluse,i barely go out the house,ive havent had sex for about a year,i had sex about two or three times the year before that,my cock is numb,i cant feel my orgasms,i have zero sex drive,somedays im totally fatigued,i have very little motivation compared to my old self,what the fuck do you think i feel like going from a life like that to the life i have now???,i just make the best of it,i will never ever give up hope that one day ill be back to normal,come on man please snap out of this suicide shite…

#35

The problem isn’t sex! No connection to the world. Cannot feel anything. Not even able to enjoy a tv show. No energy, no sleep. Also I can’t see well. Panic all the time. Who can keep this up for years?

#36

Whats the attack on paul here? Just because he wants out of this hell. If his kids realized what he is going through they would understand. I seriously hope he doesnt but ultimately its not cool for you to call him a fucki g asshole for wanting this nightmare to be over.

#37

we need hope but we cant see any hope living with this shit is so bad but in future may be a cure or a thing makes we better like normol we live with this dream however some of us cant see a dream at night so dream good days or pray for good days i m hopeless i know not to be hopeless but i cant wait for your good days with your family and friends there will be much thing to do when we normal

#38

Please if you have mild pfs dont send messages like “ohh what a stupid attidute to think suicide everyday you pussies”
Im tired of explain my all symptoms, i can only tell you i have literally 30 35 symptoms. Depression (or brain fog or anxiety depersonalination whatever shit) is not acceptible thing. Imagine 7/24 just breathing not living. When you wake up mental sides here, when you shit mental sides here, when you watch tv, go outisde etc every fucking minutes here. Dont underrestimate the power of pfs. I can change my pfs with cancer.
Look dr daniel, probably he had really strong character powerful mentality etc this features gave him a really good career. But now he is dead. HE GAVE UP 1 YEAR LATER. COULDNT TAKE IT. Or lets look pauls life, he is cop and probably he had stong mental features too.

So, please shut up if you dont have any idea what were going through.

#39

Some of us do. It gets better.

#40

We MUST stay positive. I will survive this and see better days. I believe the worst is behind me.

#41

Im sticking with 15mg remeron for sleep, and 50mg zoloft for depression. Not gonna fuck with it for atleast another year. Gonna diet, keep hitting weights, and keep fighting this for my future and for everyone that loves and cares about me. Giving up is not an option for me.

#42

Obviously it’s his right so if you want to go for it. But… I was shitty for so long, now I feel so much better, my libido is almost 100%, interest in family and life again, better sleep and energy etc. as I have said a million times I was completely fucked!!

Even my penis is returning to normal!! On a constant basis!!! Yes yes before you ask, it was cold tiny and numb for months.

#43

Wow I started this thread to vent because I was about to give up on going to doctors and just let my pfs take it’s toll. After reading all of the subsequent replies though I gotta say it gave me a different outlook on everything (but with my crazy back and forth mood swings who knows if itll last).

I see both sides of the argument, I mean as a dad I would be willing to live as a miserable, depressed, castrated zombie just for my kids (easy to say as I don’t have as bad of sides as some apparently and I do not have kids- probably never will now come to think of it thanks to fin!). On the other side, if my sides are considered mild (which compared to what I’m reading they are) then I can totally understand the thought of suicide. I have thought of it myself many times in fact, although every time I have snapped and planned to end it I started feeling better for a while by luck or chance and I never did. Now I am at a point where overall I feel I can handle this more, even though I still occasionally get depressed.

I guess overall our best bet is to look at this like any other disease. If we had cancer we’d keep fighting. If we had aids we’d keep fighting. So I understand if someone needs to end it all but I hope we can all be strong enough to keep on fighting.

I had a random month where I did better in July and one week out of that month I actually felt pretty normal. If those weeks can happen, it must mean that this shit isnt permenant. I dunno now I’m just rambling. I plan on trying Quercetin next to see if itll help fix my prostate.

#44

That is great man… So time obviousely heals this condition