PFS recovery is “not impossible. “ In June 2017 I fully recovered (except sleep) - Anonymous1968's post-PFS journal

[anonymous1968]

Aloha. First a bit about me:

My profile:

https://forum.propeciahelp.com/t/took-f-for-17-yrs/9215

ABOUT ME: In summary, I’m a 50yo retired-for-now lawyer. I religiously took 1mg FIN daily from 1999-2014. I started losing the ability to sleep in June 2014 and had no clue it was related to FIN. By Dec I had stopped sleeping ENTIRELY and discontinued FIN. 10 days later post-finasteride exploded my brain!

The fantastic news is that I VERY FORTUNATELY recovered 100% from total loss of libido (after 2 years), total physical impotence (2.5 years), frightening delusions (2 months), total loss of emotionality/compassion/feelings (6 months), breast development (2 months), intense penis pain (1 month), and - oddly - my facial hair 100% stopped growing for 4 months and then resumed normal growth!

The bad news is my sleep remains profoundly dysfunctional. I very rarely reach unconsciousness and just “heavy rest” 4 hours at night - with Belsomra sleeping pill - and take “heavy rest” naps 1-2 times randomly.

January 2020 Update:

Hello again and happy new year! I’m a 51yo attorney in Washington DC. I took FIN daily from 1999 until Dec 2014, then “crashed” ten days later. I eventually 100% recovered from numerous horrific PFS maladies as follows:

6 months total loss of emotionality

24 months total loss of libido

30 months total loss of sexual elections

6 months body feminization (breast development, thinning)

2 months “raccoon eyes”

2 months delusions

1 month penis pain

Lengthy extreme disorientation/feeling unreal

Unfortunately I still suffer extreme sleep dysfunction, which began June 2014. (See my previous posts.)

Rest assured I am not delusional, confused, or moronic. 50+ exceptional doctors- including Dr. Michael Irwig - have “treated” me. I literally have 1000+ pages of medical documentation since 2014! (I totally reject alternative medicine BTW.)

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Unfortunately, how/why I naturally recovered is inexplicable and a total mystery. I never expected to recover and only took sleep and anti-depressants for years. But I am Exhibit A that PFS recovery is “not impossible” after all.

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I am most frequently asked about fully recovering sexually. It just happened. I had ZERO sexual thoughts for two years but I became ravenously “horny” again in late 2016, exactly as pre-2014. I watched an erotic video in June 2017 and was shocked to discover my sexual plumbing worked perfectly again after ZERO sexual erections - not even a hint of one - since Dec 2014. (My testosterone level was normal entire time 2014 to now). I, er, “pet the snake” 2+ times a day, no issues whatsoever (full, firm, long-lasting). Currently searching for GF. (Pls don’t ask weird or invasive Qs about above. I will not respond. Everything works perfectly normally.)

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Feel free to contact me at moviepostercollectors@gmail.com or visit me in DC! One PFS victim has visited twice!

[anonymous1968]

My advice is HANG IN THERE - YOU MIGHT RECOVER LIKE ME!

[anonymous1968]

Some of my very rare original theater-used movie posters:

[anonymous1968]

Finally LOL…

[lakehouse]

LMAO this dude out here really trying to sell us tshirts

[moonman1]

[gents93]

no need to smoke anything ever again just read this post

[Dubya_B]

@Ozeph, I don’t believe @anonymous1968 meant to do anything unethical, only trying to lighten the mood.

Either way it is very strange to provide enough personal information in one post, (including an Okay Cupid profile?), for anyone with google to make an identification or to solicit anti-suicide t-shirts directly to a group of people at risk for suicide. Both violate the site’s terms of service.

I think we are fairly lenient with allowing links to products here, because they are often provided in context of an individual’s personal treatment attempts, but this pushes across the line.

The personal info and links are being removed.

Please don’t use this site as if it’s facebook.

[lakehouse]

actually lol’d

[anonymous1968]

When PFS overwhelmed me in Dec 2014, I lost ALL my “humanity” (emotion, compassion, empathy, etc.). But it eventually ALL came back

So I’m trying to be helpful here and present the possibility that your emotional normality/humanity will COMPLETELY return eventually, as it did for me.

I had forgotten how I turned into an amoral, soulless, emotionless robot when PFS hit me in Dec 2014. I was normal until then, cared about others (esp. family), donated to charity, had a fun/joyful life most of the time, girlfriend, cried when watching E.T. (haha), etc.

EVERY TRACE of my “humanity” inexplicably disappeared overnight when PFS hit. I cared about nothing, no trace of emotion/feeling, just didn’t give a [bleep] about anything or anyone. I was not sad about the “emotional void” because it was IMPOSSIBLE to remember/recover any trace of humanity.

Combined with the other horrific things that were happening to me (total impotence, zero libido, breast development(!), black eyes, etc.), I tried to kill myself by starvation (stupid, I know, but it was impossible to buy a gun, too painful to hang/poison/cut my wrists/etc.). But I got involuntarily thrown into a hospital for two months in April 2015 and survived.

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Anyway, the great news is my normal humanity 100% returned eventually; all compassion/emotion/sense of humor totally normal. Like PFS never occurred. I wish I had kept a journal to track when/how emotional normality returned. It mostly returned by mid-2015, though I still felt suicidal due to 100% sexual dysfunction (which amazingly also disappeared in 2017, see my other threads (perhaps caused by bloodstream injections of methyl steroids)).

So hang in there if you feel like an emotional zombie. You just might recover!

P.S. Here’s a jokey text message I sent today to my personal assistant Jenel - life is fun again!

[Jay]

Hi, glad to know that you feel better… Did you have insomnia and tachycardia during your sleeps ?

[anonymous1968]

Sorry, don’t understand your question.

Has anybody else lost emotional feeling and regained it, like me? How long to recover?

[borax]

I’m roughly 8 months off, and although I did not regain emotion, my emotional sensation is better on more days than not. Still have days where it’s nonexistent, still have days where I feel terrible, but I also have good days. I do have a lot of other qualities like the ones you described returning to varying degrees, but it’s hard to be as compassionate as I used to simply because my life is so terrible.

I was also wondering, did you ever have a loss of sensitivity and did methylsteroids bring this back?

[anonymous1968]

Too bad for you Borax! But some improvement is good news so hang in there.

No, my sense of humor/emotionality/compassion were back in full force within six months of Dec 2014. Libido independently returned in Jan 2017. Taking methyl steroids in Feb 2017 POSSIBLY eded all remaining sexual dysfunction by June 2017. (See my other threads.)

Psychotherapy was not helpful for me (no one understands the horrors of PFS) but it may work for you.

So I’m a rare example of a PFS victim who somehow fully recovered from ALL PFS maladies except insomnia. By nearly starving myself I severely damaged my speech, balance, and fine motor control.

DON’T BE LIKE ME AND “GIVE UP” PREMATURELY!

[ignite]

Are you sure it wasn’t just the probiotics that cured you

[anonymous1968]

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306453018305067

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306453018305067

Finasteride ‘Causes Several Alterations’ in the Section of the Brain Responsible for Processing Long-term Memory and Emotional Responses, New Animal-model Study Demonstrates

SOMERSET, N.J., Oct. 1, 2018 – “Finasteride treatment causes several alterations in the hippocampus,” the section of the brain responsible for processing long-term memory and emotional responses, according to a new study conducted at the University of Milano, and the Cajal Institute and Carlos III Health Institute, both in Madrid.

Titled Treatment of male rats with finasteride, an inhibitor of 5alpha-reductase enzyme, induces long-lasting effects on depressive-like behavior, hippocampal neurogenesis, neuroinflammation and gut microbiota composition, the animal-model study was led by Roberto Cosimo Melcangi, Ph.D. at UM’s Department of Pharmacological and Biomolecular Sciences, whose team totaled seven researchers from the three institutions.

[anonymous1968]

Anybody else recover?

I am extraordinarily fortunate because I had worst-case scenario PFS and I’m 90% cured of PFS-related maladies that plagued me since Dec 2014:

• 100% loss of emotionality/compassion (100% resolved after 6 months)
• 100% loss of libido (100% resolved after 2 years)
• 100% physical impotence (100% resolved after 2.5 years, possibly due to intravenous methyl steroid treatment recommended by Mayo)
• breast development, penis pain, etc. all resolved quickly

I still have horrific insomnia but it is 50% cured now with Balsomra/exercise. I’ve slept 3-5 hours per night for a while.

[Mcbbould]

Did you have mental symptoms aside from insomnia and emotional bluntness? You only mentioned physical and sexual.

Thx

[anonymous1968]

Yes!

• extremely disturbing hallucinations (100% resolved after 2 months)
• 100% loss of emotionality/compassion/empathy (100% resolved after 6 months)
• two years suicidal depression (several unsuccessful suicide attempts, tried to buy gun, nearly starved myself); OK(ish) since Jan 2017, no anti-depressants since then

[Mcbbould]

Glad you’re doing so well now. Gives the rest of us hope. I’ve been dizzy and have fucked up vision for the last 5 months. Hoping all our stories end like yours.