AnhedonicClimber's story

Welcome to our community. Please fill in the following template as a way of introducing yourself, and helping others to understand your background and situation.

Where are you from (country)?
-US

How did you find this forum (Google search – if so, what search terms? Via link from a forum or website – if so, what page? Other?)
-Google Search finasteride syndrome recovery

What is your current age, height, weight?
-29, 6’2",170lbs

What specific drug did you use (finasteride, dutasteride, saw palmetto, isotretinoin/Accutane, fluoxetine, sertraline, citalopram, leuprorelin, etc…)?
-topical Finasteride and Minoxidil from Hims

What dose did you take (eg. 1 mg/day, 1 mg every other day etc.)?

  • 1-4 sprays a day

What condition was being treated with the drug?

  • thinning/receding hairline

For how long did you take the drug (weeks/months/years)?

  • 1 month

Date when you started the drug?

  • September 2023

Date when you quit the drug?

  • October 2023

Age when you quit?
-29

How did you quit (cold turkey or taper off)?
-Cold Turkey

How long into your usage did you notice the onset of side effects?
-I became more depressed when I started using it but didn’t make the connection. Went on a 4 day camping trip at the end of September and didn’t up using it during. When I got back I realized I had ED and no libido. Stopped using it after that.

What side effects did you experience that have yet to resolve since discontinuation?
-Anhedonia, brain fog, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, ED, no libido, no orgasm, low appetite, insomnia

Check the boxes that apply. You can save your post first, then interactively check/uncheck the boxes by clicking on them. If your symptoms change, please update your list.

Sexual
[X ] Loss of Libido / Sex Drive
[ x] Erectile Dysfunction
[ ] Complete Impotence
[ X] Loss of Morning Erections
[ X] Loss of Spontaneous Erections
[X ] Loss of Nocturnal Erections
[X ] Watery Ejaculate
[X ] Reduced Ejaculate
[X ] Inability or Difficulty to Ejaculate / Orgasm
[ ] Reduced Sperm Count / Motility

Mental
[X ] Emotional Blunting / Emotionally Flat
[ X] Difficulty Focusing / Concentrating
[ ] Confusion
[X ] Memory Loss / Forgetfulness
[ ] Stumbling over Words / Losing Train of Thought
[ ] Slurring of Speech
[ X] Lack of Motivation / Feeling Passive / Complacency
[X ] Extreme Anxiety / Panic Attacks
[ X] Severe Depression / Melancholy
[ X] Suicidal Thoughts

Physical
[X ] Penile Tissue Changes (narrowing, shrinkage, wrinkled)
[ ] Penis curvature / rotation on axis
[ ] Testicular Pain
[ X] Testicular Shrinkage / Loss of Fullness
[X ] Genital numbness / sensitivity decrease
[ ] Weight Gain
[ ] Gynecomastia (male breasts)
[ ] Muscle Wastage
[ ] Muscle Weakness
[ ] Joint Pain
[ X] Dry / Dark Circles under eyes

Misc
[ ] Prostate pain
[ ] Persistent Fatigue / Exhaustion
[X ] Stomach Pains / Digestion Problems
[ ] Constipation / “Poo Pellets”
[ ] Vision - Acuity Decrease / Blurriness
[ ] Tinnitus (ringing or high pitched sound in ears)
[ ] Hearing loss
[ ] Increased hair loss
[ ] Frequent urination
[ ] Lowered body temperature

[ ] Other (please explain)

What (if any) treatments have you undertaken to recover from your side effects since discontinuation of the drug?
-Hill running, cold showers, intermittent fasting, 2-day fast, keto. May be starting Bupropion tomorrow.

If you have pre or post-drug blood tests, what hormonal changes have you encountered since discontinuing the drug (please post your test results in the “Blood Tests” section and link to them in your post)?

Anything not listed in the above questions you’d like to share about your experience?

Tell us your story, in your own words, about your usage and side effects experienced while on/off the drug.

Got topical finasteride/Minoxidil from Hims since they advertised lower risk. I even saw the studies and some stories of the side effects, but decided to do it anyway since my brother already was taking the pill and said it didn’t effect him that much.

I’m a climber, and before taking it I had been on a trip to Tensleep Wy at the end of August that was one of the best trips of my life. I had been on a lot of trips in the year and a half leading up to this, British Columbia, Spain, Kentucky, all of which were helping me to have a lot of hope for my future and gave me confidence in my life. At home I was in the works to start a climbing shoe resoling business, and was an active member of my local climbing community. I was looking forward to the next decade, and really felt like I had my life in order.

Unfortunately, the combination of being depressed about a former relationship, and a fragile self esteem connected to how I look led me to be willing to try anything to reverse the little thinning that was happening to my hair. After getting back from Tensleep, the finasteride spray was in my mail and I started using it at the beginning of September.

I remember descending into a deeper depression that month that I had associated with the increased hairloss from starting Minoxidil the month before. I now think it was likely partially due to finasteride side effects. At the end of September I took a trip to Lander WY with a friend to check out the climbing shoe cobbler there and try our hand at Sinks Canyon and Wild Iris. I took my spray for that four day trip, but didn’t end up using it.

When I got back I expected there to be a build up of libido from four days of exercise outside and no masturbating. Instead I felt nothing and had trouble even getting an erection. I immediately realized what was happening and stopped the finasteride. Through the month of October I just went back to my climbing goals and put my mind off it. It was then that I started to realize the entire reward system in my brain wasn’t firing anymore. I would work as hard as I possibly I could to send a climb, but instead of the expected euphoria or dopamine glow, I felt completely flat. I got better at resoling shoes, and by the end of the month I finished four pairs as perfectly as I could. Nothing. No reward. I felt empty.

In November I had already planned a trip to Vegas and then Mexico for the winter. While in Vegas I took a mushroom trip with some friends in the hopes that I could access some emotions, and fix whatever was going on with me if it was just psychological. I wasn’t able to access any feelings with the exception of fear. Fear still worked. I opened up to my friends at the end of the mushroom trip, and that was probably the best thing that could have happened at that point. It took me from being a very guarded person to being comfortable with vulnerability overnight. The next day some of my friends flew home, and that night I had a breakdown. I ended up calling my sister-in-law who is a therapist and crying on the phone for three hours. The next day I called my sister just to help me make the rest of the trip home.

That was the bottom.

Since then I’ve gone back to therapy. It’s helped, and I have made a lot of progress on non finasteride things since I’ve lost whatever was holding me back from opening up about my life. I made an Instagram post shared with close friends explaining what was going on with me and that I believed it to be due to finasteride.

Now I just try and stick to what helps. I run, climb and workout. I take cold showers when I need them. I’m trying keto. I go to therapy. I try to schedule dinners with friends. I borrow a friends dog that I’m close with for company and runs. I’m vulnerable and share with friends who know. I go to bed early. I’ve started a window garden. I’m practicing guitar again.

There are days where my mood is decent and I feel positive about the future. There are days where I think there’s no hope and consider suicide.

I’m trying to keep the plan pre-finasteride me made. I kind of consider him a different person since my personality has changed so much. I re-bought my tickets to Mexico. I’m going to do my best to start my resoling business.

I fucking hate this. It feels like I sent my soul to jail and my body is left here to try and live without it, and hope it’s not a life sentence.

Self-reporting template - ONLY USE FOR FUTURE POSTS TO REPORT ANY TRIALS OF TREATMENTS, NOT YOUR INITIAL MEMBER STORY

  1. Name of the therapy/substance:
    • Dosage:
    • How often you took it:
  2. Status
    • Still using [ ]
    • Stopped with no lasting change to initial symptoms [ ]
    • Stopped with persistent change to symptoms [ ]
  3. Duration of use: Days [ ] Months [ ] Years [ ]
  4. Response when you started:
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]
  5. Current response (if you’re still using the therapy/substance) OR Response in the time before you stopped the treatment
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]
  6. Lasting changes to initial symptoms after cessation (if you have stopped for more than 3 weeks)
    • Greatly improved [ ]
    • Slightly improved [ ]
    • Stayed the same [ ]
    • Slightly worsened [ ]
    • Greatly worsened [ ]
4 Likes

Been in Mexico a few weeks now. Mentally I think I’m doing better than I was back home when I left. I get a lot of sunshine and exercise every day. I can focus on cooking and climbing with the friends I’ve made down here. A stray puppy has been living with us that I’m seriously considering taking home if I can find someone to drive him back to the states.

Sexually it’s the worst it’s ever been. I have zero libido. The ED is getting worse and I think there’s pretty obviously been atrophy. When I was in a tent I could force an erection in the morning just to get some blood flow, but since I moved in close quarters with friends it’s not really an option. I should probably find a way to do something, but I don’t know. Fuck it. The rest of me is doing pretty well considering the anhedonia.

Been taking Wellbutrin daily. Running low on arginine so I rarely take it. Sleep is spotty the last couple nights due to the massive speakers Mexicans in this town use every weekend until 1am. My diet is pretty much anything that’s available, including some pretty sugary food. Looking at some dope looking cookies in this cafe right now.

When I get back I have intentions to get on a fairly strict keto diet, but we’ll see how that goes. I regret my 2 day fast back in December, my sexual sides definitely got worse after. Some mental symptoms disappeared though.

1 Like

It’s been about six and a half months since I stopped using finasteride. Mentally I’m doing ok. Still mostly anhedonic but I have felt “stirrings” of emotions a few times. I’m back up in the US and have been climbing with friends regularly and focusing on starting my business. I also brought a dog up from Mexico and he has definitely been a huge boon. He keeps me focused on the day to day, gives me daily bits of laughter.

God I miss joy. Mirth. The feeling you get on a sunny day in spring, as the snow melts and the air is crisp.

5 Likes

I can totally relate. But you’re still early in the process. You might see more improvements in the next 12 months.

1 Like

Just wanted to share that I’m feeling alright today. Been getting a lot of sun and exercise. Erections have been getting better. Music sounds a little nicer. Went for a trail run yesterday. I know there are ups in downs in this just like regular life, so I’m enjoying an up right now. Still have a constant tightness in my chest like dread/anxiety, but It’s nice to see other things fluctuate to new relative highs that I haven’t seen in awhile.

I’ve also been doing kegels every morning and everytime it pops into my head during the day.

I’ve been waking up with morning wood more often now, and with the glans more full than before. Some sensation has returned but nothing that pleasurable and little to no orgasm sensation. Still have anxiety and flat emotions. Little to no joy.
My body looks stronger though. I believe from the lower carb high protein diet. I’ve been climbing fairly strong, on routes I struggled with last year. My pre pfs goal had been to send 13a, which might still happen this year.
I think often of how a backpacking trip could be good for healing. Sun, exercise, low stress no phones. Cold water and nature. Curious if anyone with pfs has noticed benefits from backpacking.

I had my dog neutered today and am regretting it immensely. The terrible experience of restricting my own hormones had always been on my mind when I was considering when to neuter him. I never really considered the thought of never doing it. Now I’m rethinking all of it. It all feels so cruel and honestly makes me feel sick. Figured this is a place with people who could empathize.

He’s pretty sad right now. I’m hoping he’ll return to normal over the next couple weeks and I’ll be able to put these feelings behind me, but damn it’s hard to sit with having made a permanent life altering decision again. I had reasons to do it, but mostly it just felt like the expected societal thing to do. I even prepaid for it with the vet. Then as I was dropping him off the nurse mentioned her dogs didn’t get neutered till 7 years old and I thought fuck really? You can do that? I had already scheduled and canceled it once out of empathy for him. I wish I had done that again. Fucking world man. Came here to vent and journal. Fucking world.

1 Like