Alternative Life Plans - Roommate for Life?

General Discussion
#13

I, like many guy’s on here, have realized that girl’s, friends of ours, family, can’t understand us, are not very supportive, and are not good ideal roommate’s for us with PFS. This is a complete traumatic life changing illness that hit most of us real hard. When we were hit with this illness, many of us were just thrown or stuck in terrible situation on all front’s. Been suffering for over 3 years.

Let’s be honest here, and no more macho bullshit; some of us changed and got sick while we were with steady girlfriend’s, fiances, wive’s, children, not understanding parents, unemployment, trouble holding a job, etc…and were left in hostile, cold, indifferent environments.
Some of us were lucky and got sick in a supportive environment, yet some of us, myself included, became ill in a shitty unhealthy situation and environment.

I live in Connecticut. I’m not a complicated guy. Just looking for a place to heal, exist and not be hassled.
I am a creative person and not looking for a type A personality to live with. I’m not complicated and can be very helpful. Like to get along well with people. I don’t drink or smoke. I like girl’s, music, art and reading. I don’t mind doing what needs to get done, I’m responsible, respectful, and respect one’s space. Easy going and easy to get along with.

If your cool with this idea, let me know.

Thanks,
R.T.

#14

therapy doesnt help a whole lot, when your counselor looks at you like your crazy when u tell them u have a 850 total testosterone but absolutely no sex drive… no doctors can really treat us at the moment and i urge anyone to think twice before blowing large quanitities of money on any of these supposed “PFS” docs. They are trying to treat the symptoms and dont really understand what has happened to us. They’ve let me down in the past and cost me substantial money and time. I spent $5-10 thousand on medical bills in 6 months didnt get anywhere really besides having confirmation that many of my hormones are messed up in wierd ways it’s been nearly a year since i quit and I have seen little improvement and do not expect much. I have hope that we maybe cured and do not think it is impossible but it may very well take time. I am somewhat lucky in that with viagra or cialis i can have sex. Although, I have serverly reduced sensitivity and no mental drive to actually preform the act… thus i need to concentrait hard while doing so. I have a girlfriend currently, she is very supportive but still it only helps doesn’t cure me… because of what has happened to me I may have lost my career, I am on extended medical leave right now and do not know what is going to happen there. I haven’t been paid in 3 months and am living off savings currently.

Mentally I have no desire to do anything. Basically I just stay at my GF’s place and play video games till she gets home from work. I used to want to do so much now I am like a miserable corpse. My parents didnt really understand and haven’t done much to help me even now that I have basically lost my job. I stopped talking to them for this reason and seeing as they live 2300 miles away i have oretty cut off all contact with my family. I just dont care anymore about anything. I have helped with my own research and talking to scientists and working with “other” studies and I hope for the best and will continue to offer any assistance that is asked of me. But nobody is going to pull the cure off the shelf at the grocery store, diet, exercise and sleep can help for some but that isnt the cure, before we can even attempt to cure ourselves we need to know what happened to our bodies exactly.

On a side note, I havent been around as much as I used to but I still keep dibs on whats going on. I was wondering one side effect I seem to have but havent seen many others mention. Does anyone have the side effect of their scrotum being tight and not hanging throughout most of the day? I seem to have this like 22/24 hrs a day and then it improves abit right before I go to bed… probably something to do with cortisol. Oh well, take care everyone… try to hang in there, I am fighting everyday to hang on to my sanity like many of you.

#15

i have the tight scrotum in tge morning and generally last to 3pm then it goes back to normal. every morning without fail this happens and must be sleep related. t is up in the morning so maybe its a link

#16

Are you fuckin’ kidding me? Is this section of the forum about balls or alternative living arrangements for guys in need? READ THE TITLE OF THIS SECTION ON TOP. I can’t believe the self absorbed ego driven nonsense sometimes. Most of you must all be from beverly hills or some rich uppper class background. Have some respect for those posting in this section for a real fuckin’ reason!

Some guys on here, myself included are in hell, and around hellish people who bash them for being sick with their ‘imaginary propecia illness’, and are just trying to find a place to live, in a sane understanding environment, because we gave up, FOR NOW on the world to understand us.

#17

In all due respect, why was my post for a roommate removed and placed here? IS THIS FORUM TOO BIG TO HUMBLE ITSELF FOR BASIC HUMAN NEEDS FOR FELLOW SUFFERERS LIKE HOUSING? wtf? Why isn’t there a section for this anywhere on this forum —for God sake’s, many men on here are borderline disabled and need REAL WORLD help. Many men on here cannot claim a disability, so the best they can hope for, is maybe an ‘understanding’ supportive roommate. Many don’t want to gamble on placing their bets on living with a woman, especially in this economy!

I’m not sure if any of you realized this yet, but I already know we ARE a UNION OF PFS SUFFERING MEN, and should try to support and help one another by any means possible. WAKE UP ALREADY AND GET SOME REAL WORLD INFO. FOR US ON HERE. Alot of us, myself included, are at wit’s end with life and just barely hanging on whatever they have now. Not easy for many of us on here, as it is, for those with caring loved ones supporting them. I’m sure I’m not the only one. Let’s get human about this forum. For God’s sake. Please!

#18

Another point to make, is that there are some like myself who want to simply move on, and start living healthy lives, and make the best of what’s left of us. Perhaps someone who would understand would be ideal.

I’m sure that I’m not the only one who feels like Syd Barrett, who never came back to earth after my drug trip of propecia. His was acid. I see no difference, because my brain feels fried after propecia. I’ve never been the same since.

Many of us need a healthy environment to recover, and I’m hoping people on here can understand that some of us are stuck in unhealthy environments, or wish to be understood, and not a burden to others.

A roommate section or alternative living arrangement section should be considered on this forum. It would actually be helpful to some I’m sure!

God bless and help us all.

#19

Please consider this forum administrator. Many of us need this outlet. I’m sure that I’m not alone on this.

#20

@robertino totti
Sorry i didn’t know this forum was all about you. i can see you are mainly talking to yourself here and should really be grateful for any posts that promotes your idea. I for one was briefly intrigued buy your idea but was soon put off as you sound like a right dick.
For your information i have been suffering for almost 2 years. My wife of 13 years has left me because of my depression and lack of sex (which was important to us). My baby i believe miscarried due to fin after about 12months off. I have been unable to conceive again, and now sex isn’t even possible. My business takings are 50% down dues to my inability to focus. I have lost all feeling in my penis, my stomach and most of my back. I have had flu like symptoms for over a year. I have trouble going to the toilet and have to check if I have even been as I have lost all feeling. My ears constantly ring which drives me mad. I have put on weight, cannot sleep and have serve depression. Loss of muscle and constantly fatigued.
So your comment “Have some respect for those posting in this section for a real fuckin’ reason! Some guys on here, myself included are in hell”
My illness is real and i too am in hell, so get over yourself and your stupid idea, seriously i cant think of anything worse than living with someone as depressed as myself. If I want to reply to a post in this topic about the size of my balls I will.

#21

annon,
I really feel for you. Even though I have/had no wife, I share almost all the things you said. Our WHOLE life is ruined. I am so desperate to get back my sexual functions. It affects every aspect of live (general well being, job performance, family etc.).

I don’t understand people like roberto tottino being so rude and self-centered. If he wants to give an advice he can say it in a polite way.

#22

Wow, man. Jesus. Please have a listen, I do understand all of you and my heart does go out to you all! I didn’t mean to come off this way gentlemen. Apologies. I’m actually a very sensitive and caring person. I feel for you all in the most sincerest way possible. I’m sorry I may have projected myself in a negative light. My father just threw a plate at me and called me a sick drug addict and asked me to move out asap. Listen…I was just frustrated at this forum, for it’s utter neglect, for some men on here in a tight spot, who may benefit from a roommate listing on this forum. This forum only seems to revolve around trying to figure out our illness, yet it does nothing for trying to assist some of us(possibly yourselves included) with real world/ real life assistance with bread and butter issues - like a roof over our heads. Bottom line is, and the source of my frustrated rant, was not meant to be self centered; I was just frustrated at the LACK of a an alternative living/roommate type section on this forum. I was only trying to help.

Do YOU have any fuckin’ idea of what it felt like to watch my own mother dieing in front of me, while your a fucking vegetable cause of propecia? or while your dad beats the shit out of you, emotionally abuse you, and suspects you of being a drug addict and a nuisance and embarasment to the family? Do you know the pain I’ve been through because of this shit and still do? Please man, let’s get off that path man…I could go on and on…we all are ill and had setbacks and have pain.

I think it would be a great idea of having someone who is a brother to you cause of this shit. I’m in favor of a roommate listing and an alternative living arrangement section. I am not depressed at all, and apologies that you are mate.

My idea was meant to HUMANIZE this forum, and adding a roommate type section is not a bad idea, but a positive idea.

I COULDN’T HAVE ANY HATRED TOWARDS ANY OF YOU ON THIS FORUM - WE ARE BROTHERS BECAUSE OF ALL THIS. A UNION. THAT’S WHERE I STAND.

Once again, sincere apologies if I offended any of you.

#23

Well, understand this. I feel for you all and how could I not? Much love and respect. I have no one left and have lost all my family, career and friends because of all this. I’m still abused and tortured at home. I have a hard time even holding a part time job, and struggle with that. The prospects for any real future look dim. Been suffering for 3 years, and also have many many physical symptoms, pains, and severe mental ailments, that I suffer from on the daily. This does affect every aspect of your life. Yes, we are all truly traumatized. I didn’t mean to come off base earlier, and I am far from insensitive. Sorry. I wish i could help us all. If I had the money, I would love to set up a non profit somewhere for us all, and offer some form of counseling assistance free of charge.
Maybe one day.

#24

Robertino, regarding your “frustration at this forum” – nobody is forcing you to visit this site (which costs you NOTHING to use, I might add). As for this forum’s “utter neglect”, that is your personal opinion and its unfortunate you see things that way. Support is obviously available from members who wish to offer support, either via open discussion or private messages. The forum owners (ie, the Administrators) are not responsible for enabling housing arrangements of forum users, that is something to be discussed between forum members if they wish.

A thread about requesting a roommate as you have done, and discussing as such via PM with interested parties, should suffice – especially as it is a private matter (do you want the whole world to know where you are planning to live?).

The forum is already extensive enough as it is, and your request, while likely of interest to a small minority, does not warrant an entire subsection dedicated to it. I wish you luck in your search for a roommate.

#25

Roberto, you seem to be airing a lot of family issues here which are unrelated to finasteride use. I understand your frustration and how persistent side effects from are forcing you to change your life, but many people have lost loved ones to cancer and have had abusive parents. The parents of the original poster of this thead lost their son to suicide. Perhaps you should so some respect to him and his family by choosing another location as an outlet for your family frustrations.

Furthermore, this isn’t about class warfare. PFS doesn’t discriminate based on wealth. Members of this forum come from all over the world and have all had their lives damaged or destroyed, many in worse ways than you.

If you want to be angry be angry at merck for lying to us about finasteride’s persistent side effects!

#26

What’s this all about then? Ganging up on me for wanting to start a roommate listing on this forum?

OK. Boy’s. I tried to help ‘those few’ or as mew put it ‘the minority’. If there is ever a one of you looking into the eye’s of a whore at a bar and telling her how you feel when your on the streets and begging her to take you in…remember this, I tried to ‘bang the drum’ and potentially give us an outlet here on this forum in terms of alternate housing. I was taken out of context.

I have had enough of this forum. If you wind up homeless…post something here. This forum is so helpful and united. Good luck guy’s…

PROPECIA HELP FORUM FOR LIFE.

#27

So…an alternate housing option, is completely out of question because of what you stated?
Please explain why you would oppose this sir.

#28

I am not opposed to the principle of it, however I think the way you are going about it isn’t the smartest. It’s clear you’re having some issues with your father and it seems you’re directing some of your anger resulting from here to this forum.

Either continue with this thread requesting PMs for housing requests or start a new one (which I believe you’ve done). It’s simple, list your desire and where you can move and if someone is interested they can PM you. I believe at least bluecloud already showed some interest.

In essence I agree with Mew that some information isn’t for the public domain and it may not be in your own interests to put it there.

#29

I just recently thought that I will save money and try to live in Hawaii or some tropical location for one month and just surf, soak up serious sun for maximum Vit D exposure, and eat healthy.

If anyone wants to join me… that would be awesome, just an all around healing trip. It might be a while though until I do it… (money)

#30

I was tossing up the idea of buying some land, building a cabin and growing all the food I need and eat really healthy. Also I could live for really cheap. But I am not sure what to do now. I have tried a lot of stuff now, some symptoms have improved but I do not think I can live life without a libido.

1 Like
#31

Some of you are in much better circumstances than others on here, unlike myself, who was hit really hard.
My life is a disaster thanks to propecia - or a living and breathing nightmare that I cannot wake from.

That’s why a roommate ‘who get’s it’ would be a good choice, for myself at least, or until I can get myself going again.
A little about myself, which I’d like to share - broken down:

  1. Became severely ill (severe painful chest pains, tinnitus, migrane headaches, heart palpitation’s, panic attack’s, arms and legs falling asleep frequently, along with severe cognitive issue’s, which have not subsided to this day. I live in a detached alter universe or a compromised state of consciousness. Frightful to say the least.

  2. My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 terminal cancer during the same month I became ill. I looked after her as often as possible for three years, while suffering with my own illness. She passed away and suffered immensely during that time.
    During this time, my dad was extremely emotionally abusive towards me and often called me a freak, an embarrassment to the family, and on many occasion’s threw me out and picked fight’s with me. He told me if I was sick, to go into an insane asylum or become homeless. No sympathy whatsoever even during an extremely tragic and heavy time for the entire family.

  3. My father continues to abuse me to this day - he has no sympathy for me or a heart. No relationship with him whatsoever. I tried explaining what happened to me to him, but it never really worked. I feel like a sick wounded animal, yet can’t seem to find a way to move out. Money’s tight and I can barely hold on to work when I find it. It’s a very hard situation that along with propecia, has beat the shit out of me. The whole point of me throwing this out there, is not to ask for sympathy, but to really state how much harder some of us were hit with this illness. It set many of us back, and personally, the only place where I can find some mutual support, is not with my friend’s or family, but sadly, this site.

I also would love to just get away and try to start a new life somewhere — I still have trouble coming to grip’s at how awful my life has become. I know I need a complete change to truly begin to heal. Like a wounded animal in the wild, I need to scurry off, and hope to heal in a safe healthy place and environment.

Peace to you all and I do hope all of us have a happy healthy new year.

#32

Did you ever show him propeciahelp.com/awareness etc?

Hang in there. Perhaps relocating somewhere for a fresh start would be a good idea if it pains you too much to be where you are.