I just met a new girl two weeks ago and we have started having sex, while my performance has improved drastically over the past year (due to fasting and also some other things) I still feel as if my performance leaves something to be desired. I am a little bit worried that this new girl is going to get tired of my lackluster performance (I would say my performance is probably on the lower end of average. Not awful, but not that great either) and is going to seek greener pastures. Anyways, I’m not asking for how to improve my EQ or anything, but rather I’m just trying to get this worry off my chest. Is anyone else here dealing with/dealt with a similar situation regarding quality of sexual performance and fidelity?
In my opinion the best way to cope with this worry is to be open about it. I told my gf that I’m on my way to a recovery and that it may take a long time with ups and downs. So far she has been supportive, and she also understands that we don’t have any fault for having taken this poison whose terrible side effects were misrepresented by the pharmaceutical companies.
And think about it from this angle: if she leaves because of PFS she was not meant to be with you. This condition may have the effect to prune egotistic partners from our lives
I’m in a slightly different boat, since I am married (with 2 kids) and I’m older (mid-40s). But I agree with elijah, that the best way to be is upfront and honest. Because I’m married, I have no choice, but to be honest with what I’m going thru. My wife has been great, 100 percent supportive and without her, I’m sure I’d be in a much worse state today.
I also agree, that if she were to ever leave u because of PFS, it probably wasn’t meant to be. I know it’s a lot of stress to try to consider someone else’s needs, while we’re trying to heal, but you can’t put too much on yourself or things will only get worse.
Nonetheless, glad u found somebody - hope it all works out.
The tongue can make up for a lot…
thanks for the advice guys. I think in my situation though, it wouldn’t really be appropriate to tell her about my PFS, I would only do that for someone I’m seriously dating. For this girl, its more of a casual sex type of thing. Its not too serious yet, like im not attached to her on an emotional level, but I think it would really hurt me if she ended up seeing other guys due to my extremely average performance. It unfortunately…has happened to me before. On a handful of occasions. (back before I made a partial recovery and when my performance was truly awful. I can’t say that I blame them for leaving me though) That being said…these days I am doing better, so maybe I could just be overthinking the whole matter; its entirely possible I might be good enough to hold on to her.
-jorbie
hehe, great advice 
If anyone wants to talk about their own issues with performance and fidelity, I would be happy to listen. I can empathize all too well
Maybe lie and attribute it to something more sympathetic? Telling the truth and referring to an obscure syndrome only recognised by an internet forum won’t be received well by anyone.
-dannyfc
heheh, yeah I know that trick, unfortunately it only works a couple of times before the girl begins to suspect that actually you just suck in bed. been there, done that lol.
I tell people I took a steriod and that I have something similar to CFS or just that I have an endocrine insufficiency. nobody believes the pfs rap. i tell my uncle about pfs, he tells me to go see a pdoc and a priest.
-pax
is your performance consistently subpar? Or do you have good times and bad times? Like for me, on some occasions I am able to perform extremely strongly and quite decently; so much to the point where no girl could claim that I suck in bed, the problem of course is that I cannot do this consistently, most of the time I end up trying my absolute hardest (no pun intended!) just to give an average performance.
Since originally crashing, I’ve only had sexual contact with my left hand. This is due to a combination of ED and “ED of the brain” as well. Only recently have I become attracted to girls again, and I mean like my buddy’s hot girlfriend. I don’t like wanting to bang her, as he’s my buddy’s SO, but I like being sexually-minded again, even if only somewhat at the moment.