Warning: restarting propecia will kill you

Had the YAG treatment today and seems to have gone well. Doc said it was a pretty bad case. I said in my previous post that I’d been obsessively cleaning my glasses for the last few months but it’s really been for the last couple years. It’s nice to have a physical symptom resolved even if it’s not directly related to PFS, although it is related since the cataracts that led to this were directly related.

The resulting floaters are pretty crazy, it’s the broken up chunk of lens capsule that he shot out with the laser. Looks like a swarm of gnats in my vision. It’s supposed to calm down but it’s way better than the cloudy film I’ve been dealing with.

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When I started wasting muscle four years ago I’d look over at my guitar and think ‘at this rate I’ll eventually have guitar neck arms’. But at the time it seemed absurd, my arms were pretty beefy and the guitar neck was a long way off. Now as I sit here my arms are closer in size to a guitar neck than what they started as.

The guitar is a Gibson ES-135. A discontinued model I’d had my eye on for a while before PFS but they were only available on used mail-order sites. After a ten month PFS hiatus I started playing again and having nothing else to spend money on I found what appeared to be a good and safe deal on one through Guitar Center. It was listed as Good condition but it was definitely not as good on arrival as listed. Guitar Center was pretty fair about it, willing to pay for any parts/repairs needed and crediting me a couple hundred dollars.

One issue was the guitar was hard to tune and the tuning pegs were hard to turn. The torn ligament in my wrist and arthritis in my thumb brought this to a head in the last week. I ordered new pegs then decided since I’d have to replace them anyway I’d just remove the stickiest one now and see if I could fix it. I ended up removing all the pegs and lubricating them and now they’re easy to turn and the guitar stays in tune.

So I can add this to the pile of go-nowhere knowledge and accomplishments gained under the cloud of PFS. On some level I resent it all and there’s quite a bit. If I had the time machine that could take me back to pre-PFS with just enough knowledge to avoid PFS and nothing else I’ve learned since, no matter how useful or interesting, I’d still do it in a heartbeat.

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I agree with the last bit. Also I should’ve known any compound or pharmaceutical drug that has a recovery community is probably no good.

I have good news and bad news. The bad news is they can’t do the wrist ligament surgery because of the arthritis in my thumb so that can only get worse.

The good news is that my right hand/wrist has now developed the same symptoms. Oh wait, that’s also bad news.

I guess there is no good news.

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This is absolutely a triggered condition. Not suggesting PFS but something caused this and it’s hand-waved as ‘autoimmune’. What pisses me off is comments from fans like ‘aging sucks’. This has jack shit to do with age and we know it.

I remember Setzer announced this a while back then said he thought it was getting better which surprised me. Now his tour is cancelled. I’d love to know what he took or encountered prior to the onset that doctors either aren’t asking about or just flat out denying.

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Had my knee surgery today. Doctor’s notes:

"Attention was directed towards the medial compartment where the meniscus showed a displaced flap tear into the medial gutter of the posterior horn into mid body segment. Arthroscopic biter and shaver was used to debride the flap back to healthy stable meniscus tissue.

Arthroscope was then placed in the patellofemoral compartment where the chondral surface of the patella showed grade 2/3 chondral changes. Gentle chondroplasty/debridement was performed of loose chondral edges of the patellar cartilage."

I did nothing to cause this. No trauma, no injury. This just demonstrates what I’ve said…degenerative PFS makes your body wear out like a pair of pants. Breakdown and recovery to strengthen simply doesn’t happen. Tissue just wears out with use and doesn’t come back. And what the surgeon did is akin to cutting the hanging strings off the holes in worn out jeans. Granted those strings were getting caught in the joint so it should alleviate symptoms. Hopefully.

Oh one other thing. Tomorrow I have a post-op followup and PT appt. I am certain the PT report will say something about atrophied quads despite the fact that I’ve been as active as I possibly can under the circumstances. Will advise.

Did you notice any reprieve in symptoms from the anesthesia? I felt so good mentally the day I woke up from my knee surgery.

Oh I was replying about the knee symptoms but you’re asking about general PFS. No, not the least bit. That wound feels as fresh today and every day as it did that fateful morning in November 2021.

I guess my knee surgery was before I technically discontinued fin, but I vividly remember how good I felt the day of my operation. Who knows how I would react now. Anyways glad to hear you’re out. Good luck with the rehab.

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Sorry this sounds fcking horrifying…

As knee surgeries go it’s pretty tame but it’s usually associated with a force incident. A normal person doesn’t just stroll his way into a flap tear.

Also…PT report didn’t specify quad atrophy but I did advise about the PFS crash without mentioning fin. The report says “sudden onset of weakness whole body- had a lot of tests ran, inconclusive”. Which is a decent summary of what I said minus the onset date.

Clinicians are too incompetent to believe that inhibiting 5 alpha reductase for roughly 20 years could be catastrophic on the human body.

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yeah it’s almost like turning off a vital part of the system isn’t a good idea…

Just bought yet another chair. It’s hard to review these for comfort because I’m reviewing as someone with no padding in their back or their ass. I’d been getting chairs with extra thick padding to make up for it but those tend to squish flat faster than the firmer ones.

The new one is firm and would probably feel great on a normal human body. I should put that in the review, let readers wonder what it means. I should probably also mention that I sit in it for sixteen hours a day.

Tore a ligament or a tendon in my jaw yesterday, further enshitifying an already grim path.

I’m actually surprised this didn’t happen sooner having lost so much supporting tissue in my face.

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Hey, I know this is gonna sound ridiculous, but have you ever thought about trying exogenous estradiol? I feel like when your body gets fcked beyond belief by this poison it’s worth trying something. It’s alleviated my genital burning which was a torturous symptom. It did stupidly come back because I tried lithium orotate and got greedy. The estradiol might help with some of the physical pain and mental torture (anhedonia, brain fog, etc.)

I haven’t, I don’t know what exogenous estradiol is.

Injectable estrogen at low doses to avoid feminization