You do you.
If your parents are likely to tell you it is all in your head, either you have an extensive medical history likely including mental health issues and past issues of lying, or you have some terribly unsupportive parents. They are the two people (if both are still in your life) I would hope anyone can confide in with confidence. For many people, just telling someone can bring relief, even if they might not ever be able to understand it, or, as in my case, it becomes clear they don’t want to always hear about it as much as you’d like to talk about it. But them just knowing why I am following water fasts and quite radical elimination diets and attending various medical appointments is worthwhile.
As to if you tell friends, it depends how close, understanding, empathetic and free of their own major problems they are. In my case, I have plenty of good friends, but those who would be good to talk to are all dealing with work-related stress, marriage problems, young kids, etc etc, so I chose not to introduce my own burdens into our relationship.
In general, if your advice is inherently negative and unhelpful, it is best to just keep it to yourself.
1 Like
Don’t see anything negative about it. I don’t want my parents to stress and worry about me. But as I said it’s not advice, everyone will decide whats best for them
“I don’t think its necessary to share it with friends and close people. It’s not gonna lead you anywhere, only can make things worse. And you will look odd.”
It was written as advice.
3 Likes
Absolutely this. Also want to add, it feels damn good speaking the truth, especially after so long keeping secrets and putting up all sorts of elaborate defences in an effort to appear ‘normal’. Letting go of this stuff can be a big relief. In fact, for me, since I’ve started telling the truth it’s become a bit of an addiction. I’ve even told a few complete strangers! Just because, why not?
Having said that, I think the other poster above made a good point when they said your colleagues might not understand why you are telling them such intimate details about yourself, which could create some awkwardness. As you say, @Greek, even though there’s no reason not to tell, there’s not necessarily a reason to tell, either. So if you’re worried about the complications there might be telling a particular person, I think it’s reasonable to reflect on what you stand to gain versus what you stand to lose.
2 Likes
I can’t get over how incredibly profound this is and find myself coming back to this every once in awhile just to re-read it. You’ve managed to quantify and describe my feelings so well that I literally could not have wrote it better myself.
Particularly these two points…
People, because they are human, simply cannot imagine what’s it like to be non-human, as libido is so fundamental to what makes one human that its absence renders one almost a different species - both physiologically and psychologically
I am particularly annoyed, even insulted, when a friend whom I have told in detail about my PFS asks me about new romantic developments - as if my PFS could be overcome if I simply tried hard enough or, alternatively, stopped thinking about it.
2 Likes
The way I see this life we have people that we can trust like family members mother father brother sister you can trust them. when it comes to friends you will have 1-2 friend in life that you can trust if you are lucky. anything else that you do is like shooting a bow straight up in a sky you will not know when or where it will come down on you. be care full who you share your secrets guys. one last thing never lose hope. in this life miracles do happen things that cant be explained by science never lose hope never stop fighting. this is life that was given once and don’t spend it living defeated fight maybe not today or tomorrow but one day I truly believe if you do things that give you slight improvements over years you will all be improved. Always believe and always fight and you will win one day. If you don’t believe me google placebo affect and how it does miracles.
3 Likes
My issues are sexual only.
- I told the girl I’m dating when we became close. She is very supportive to the point where I can just talk to her as a confidante, which helps me process this.
- I told a female doctor, whose reaction helped me (“guys want sex, we women just want to be held”)
- I’m considering telling a friend to make HIM feel better about a psychiatric condition he has
- I didn’t tell my parents because I can cope and want to save them the grief. (If I couldn’t cope, I’d tell them and they’d support me.)
1 Like