I'm Out

General Discussion
#1

I’ve been thinking about doing this for ages now, the only thing that has stopped me is hope that I can recover (that may still be the case) who knows but the longer it goes on the more suffocated by this I feel it’s endless nightmare and I wanna leave. I hate what my life has become full of restrictions and doom, seeing my friends and family effortlessly live there lives infuriates me for some reason. My being here I feel is just bringing them down even further, so I feel it is my time. A fucked up brain and dick and everything else leaves me with no worthwhile future, only you guys can understand. I’ve just taken stool sample for parasites/bacteria/candida overgrowth and I’ve got an MRI coming up this week (I’m expecting both to come back all clear) if and when that happens that for me is my last push. I’ve tried virtually everything you can think of bar drugs. Credit to those of you not giving up (hope it works out for you), if it makes me look/sound weak I don’t give a fuck I’ve reached my limit.

I’m out

Danny

#2

Danny,

I know how you feel, and think everyone on this forum does too. But studies will be out soon - I’ve had periods when symptoms have been much better, and believe that this condition can be treated when we know more. Trust me: your loved ones want you to continue and care about you.

#3

I know exactly where you are. I have reached that point, too. And I am so glad I hung in there. I started seeing improvements right around where you are time-wise, honestly. Please hang in there.

#4

Sorry 2 hear that. But there is no hurry as it is a drastic action we are all going to die sooner or later anyway. Bet to wait it out as long as you can.

Can you give us your story on fin? Did you just take 4 piills?

#5

Please Danny, stay with us. Death is a final solution, but no matter what you think, your suffering may end but all you’ll do is pass it on to your loved ones for the rest of their lives. It sounds like you are preparing for the worst with regards to your recent tests in order to move forward with your plans to end your life. Try and live a bit longer with it, no matter how difficult, as there is hope out there. Don’t let a test result determine your end, no matter how tempting that must feel for you just now. Try and find someone to talk to about your thoughts, even if it is the Samaritans. Living with something like this is hellish, but you can’t fix death. Please try and hang on and not become another statistic. I know that these are just words on a forum, but your life, no matter how limited it is just now, is a billion times more important and significant than that cunting pharmaceutical company.

#6

Danny, every moment of my life is a struggle. I know how bad you want it to end. Just wait till the studies come out. Id like for you to be here with us when find what it is that broke us. I want to celebrate with you when, God willing, they find a cure.
Tlecum

#7

Appreciate your messages guys, but I don’t think I’m gonna change my mind if I was certain I could reverse this situation then I would but I’m struggling to find enough reasons to keep going it’s sad its come to this but I’m ruined and I can’t keep going just in hope. I’ll be around for a bit longer at least until my results come back in.

Respect,

Danny

#8

Danny, I’m in the same boat as you. We have to wait until the results of the first round of studies come in. They’ve been years in the making and we’re on the home stretch now. Anyone here have the latest on ETA of the first studies?

All these years of talk and wild speculation/experimentation on the forum wasn’t ever really going to produce anything. It was just a bunch of guys suffering symptoms and flailing about without actual knowledge or expertise. Now we’ve finally got the attention of the people with the background and capability to help. It’s critical we hang on at least until at least the first round of their efforts come to fruition.

#9

Hi Danny,

You might want to try the MAFActive (GcMAF) Cream.

This has helped me more than any other drug or supplement I tried.

See my post here
viewtopic.php?f=6&t=10991

Using the cream makes PFS alot more bearable for me.

It may even be a cure in the long term.

I say this because I believe PFS is an autoimmune condition.

If we can fix the immune system then we should be able to recover.

1 Like
#10

As much as id like to try to convince you to keep hope, i am on the same page. I cannot tell you that your life is worth living only you can make that choice.

Maybe as one last stand do a 14-21 day supervised waterfast, or hell do it alone at home. If you plan on checking out you got nothing to lose.

take care

#11

I disagree with your decision. Brainfog is something that has a high chance of getting better with time; at least that is the experience of many forum members.

We need people to continue on with their previous goals. If everybody just says “Im Out”, we will never solve this problem.

I would suggest to you:

  1. Always get enough sleep. If you dont, PFS mental side effects get much worse. Also always go to sleep at the same time and wake up at the same time.

  2. Try to live as healthy as possible, with good food and excercise. Thats not a silver bullet obviously, but it helps manage the symptoms, especially mental.

  3. Realize, that in your bad mental state, you cant make rational decisions.

  4. Restart your life. We need people to donate to the foundation. If everybody would have no job and just stop their lives, the PFS foundation wouldnt have ANY! funding. We need to strive for a (high) income DESPITE PFS (especially if the member doesnt have brainfog and crushing fatique) that can finance continual research. This research might be very interesting for a lot of sexual problems men experience and thus could get much greater funding if interesting stuff is unearthed with these studies.

#12

I don’t want in anyway to advocate suicide, but I respect that it is only your decision to make. If you feel that you have reached the end of the road I would suggest giving yourself some time, like even a year if possible, knowing that you can check out at the end of that time frame if you still chose. I only say that as 1. as I’ve said, once you’ve done the deed that is it, irrespective of what may be on the horizon with regards to the studies etc., and that life is too precious to rush into anything like this when we can only work within the scope of our own heads and that these time frames that we create for ourselves regarding how much we can personally tolerate before we reach the end of our rope amount to nothing when we consider the bigger picture. And no, I don’t believe in God, but your decision is steeped in subjectivity. The second point is out of all of this, all of us are valuable commodities, each of us living testimonies to a crime of our age. Don’t go quietly into the night. If you are going to kill yourself, consider spending some time fighting back by ensuring that the world is in no doubt that you are in effect being murdered. Although contrary to what I’ve just put, ideally Stay with us. We need you alive.

#13

Also stop reading this forum; the more you focus on it, the worse the mental sides will get. You need to distance yourself from PFS. I know its a tough thing to do, I am not trying to downplay PFS (trust me I have been hit hard regarding the symptoms category).

#14

Danny, life is a struggle and PFS can be a nightmare. We can all relate too well. But what 2.5 years of PFS has taught me is that this thing is a roller-coaster ! Some day / weeks / months(?) can actually feel pretty normal and you have to keep up to be able to feel those moments.

At this point is you are facing a crash, take whatever you need to get out of it … Tongkat Ali has been good for most of us.

Keep in touch and hang in there.

#15

Yes, but of course everyone is suffering from this to varying degrees. So for some sufferers there’s no upside, it’s a continuous downside. Some just have mental or just sexual, or a combination of the two from to mild to severe. I can understand why guys have done it, because it got too much for them, what is too much for them may not be too much for you. Life is a struggle, but this is no commonplace struggle it effectively destroys lives whether temporarily or permanently depending on how bad you’ve got it. I would say my case is bad enough, there are guys worse off than me but like I said its relentless grinding you down. Having said that, I have decided not to act on my thoughts yet and I’ll hang on for as long as I can but if I reach the point where I feel like there’s no going back in future it will be because my chances of having a family/happiness have been robbed, my functioning has been impaired/damaged beyond repair and to me family/friends won’t be enough to keep me around. But for now, I’ll do all that I can to try and recover.

#16

Pfs is just a fucking shame.

How can something even exist?

Hopes, dreams, life completely SHATTERED. Over a cosmetic treatment?

Its unbelievable. Why us?

Decades of progress through life trashed by trying to stop some hairloss. Turning achievers into tortured slugs.

The universe makes no sense. It breaks my heart thinking about how my life would have been if i didn’t care about my fucking hair

#17

You’ve done an ACTH stimulation test twice, and failed it both times - which indicates an issue with the adrenal glands/cortisol.

What happened after that?

#18

Danny, I’m in the same boat as you are. I’m almost 40 years old, dying to have a family but unable to to even enjoy any relationship with a woman at all because of zero libido, and see nothing but a long, lonely, tortured road of endless life disappointment ahead. I’m barely hanging on.

The thing that’s keeping me going is hope that it will finally be possible to receive treatment once the first studies have come in.

We need to wait for the studies. We need to try to hold out that long.

Does anyone have any up to date info on when the first study will be published? Some of us are almost literally dying here waiting. Who knows, maybe some have already died needlessly. I don’t mean to be melodramatic, but this is serious stuff. The suffering is tremendous.

#19

Our systems are all out of whack or fundamentally broken. If the latter, everything has to be rebuilt from scratch. Unless you just have a really mild case of PFS, considerable discipline, toughness and patience will be required to make and execute a plan to get better. Natural recovery is the slowest way to heal but should offer some hope to those struggling. Also, more advanced knowledge and better treatment will be on the way someday.

#20

I would suggest:

  1. Sleep
    2)Healthy Diet
  2. Regular excercise
  3. Giving it a lot! of time
  4. Pursue your old goals. Get a hobby to distract you.
  5. Ease up on the number of forum visits, this can be stressful and increase depression/anxiety (as reported by many sufferers already).
  6. Set up a monthly recurring donation to the pfs foundation via: pfsfoundation.org/donate/. Even if its a small amount (10 dollars/month for example), it adds up over time and when everyone does it. This monthly recurring donation is easily set up via paypal (see link).

Imagine 500 people donating 20 per month. That adds up to 10.000 usd per month, which would be a massive surge in the amount of donations the pfs foundation receives. Even though I am still at university (aim to finish next year), I have set up such a monthly donation and my brother has done the same.

Encourage your parents / family to support the foundation as well.

Once we demonstrate via scientific studies that this syndrom is real, a lot more resources will be made available to further understand and cure it.