Agarman's Story - Shrinkage from Liposomal Finasteride

Member Stories
#11

Thanks everyone for the replies. Quick end of weekend update from me.

I wrote this post on a Friday afternoon and was experiencing non-trivial shrinkage after being on the up and up (looked like I had a child’s penis while flaccid…),and what felt like an anxiety attack (from reading the stories here all day long I think…). I made a point to eat a healthy salad and a bunch of spinach as indicated earlier. Not sure if it did much - but I did think I felt a bit better and more full/sexual, likely placebo though.

Spent the weekend outdoors at a concert and with friends - tried my best to keep my mind off of it which is easier said than done. Think the heat helped increase size but was constantly checking as non-obviously as I could all weekend…

Still getting nocturnal erections from what I can tell. Slowly felt better each day. Was able to masturbate Friday and get it up without porn which is a good sign (haven’t in 1 week, trying to limit) - couldn’t have done that a few days ago. Shrunk back again slowly after, at a similar rate to normal, but reduced to what I would think is ~50% of normal size. Seemed not 100% the next day but acceptable (which I consider to be when the tip goes past the testicles, even if just slightly).

This morning I woke up and felt “fuller” down there - had sexual urges and was able to get it up a few times from self stimulation and imagination. Size looks almost normal in the mirror most times I check and feeling a bit more libido if that makes sense? Taking this all as a good sign.

Concerningly, I am noticing that when erect my penis is tilting on it’s axis to the right - not painful or limiting in size, but seems to be pyronie’s disease? Would align with a slight hourglass figure I’m seeing on my right side only when flaccid… I’m shocked such a short amount of time on the drug can do that - hoping it’s not permanent, but if I can come out with just this I’d be beyond thrilled. Can anyone comment on their experience with Pyronie’s and Fin?

Feeling much better overall today but not deluding myself, know I’m very far from out of the woods yet. Still extremely on edge about a potential crash popping up out of nowhere - seems there’s no rhyme or reason in the way of “if you make it X weeks without a crash you’re likely in the clear”… Will try to post updates 1x a week or so for anyone else in the future experiencing a similar profile.

Gents - thanks for the point about Zinc, I had no idea! I have seen it recommended everywhere here to reduce estrogen as you quit… I’ve dropped the dose down significantly but am still taking some (~50mg) for now. Seeing conflicting evidence on this but would like your take - does the mild 5AR inhibition outweigh the Estrogen suppression from your experience/knowledge? Wonder if I should taper down over the next days.

Fingers crossed this is all a good sign on the way to recovery. Know 10 days since quitting is almost no time and a crash could pop up at any point… Seriously can’t thank this community enough for existing and everyone for their kind words so far. I’m hoping the small donations I can make will help find a way out of this horrible disease…

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#12

Quick update.

Feel as if I’m in the middle of a crash. Was able to masturbate again last night to test the pipes no problem. Felt very full and penis was back to normal size last night. Had nocturnal erections and woke up feeling good. Even had a spontaneous erection this AM.

I think something happened this morning though. I may be in the middle of a crash… My penis shrunk way up, testicles too all of a sudden. I had a very delayed lunch and not much to eat the last 24 hours and felt something like an anxiety attack coming on. Felt something similar last Friday but managed to get my mind off of it and it passed.

Feeling extremely anxious - is this the dreaded crash? It’ll be ~12 days since stopping the gel now… Been having loose stools from all the spinach, so it may be something else, but my extreme shrinkage going on this morning is very worrying. Going to try and push through with work and keep my mind occupied as I eat my spinach and try to focus on staying positive. Wish me luck all - please send any advice you may have my way.

#13

I don’t want this to sound like I’m discounting your symptoms, but it sounds to me like you’re in a constant cycle of worry - anxious because of shrinkage, shrinkage because your anxious. Someone correct me if I’m wrong but if you were to experience the crash, you would know right away.

Chances are you’re probably panicking. If it makes you feel better, Im riding this out with you. 5 days off 9 pills now, not feeling any differently then pre-fin but will keep you updated.

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#14

I think you’re right Pete. Took some calming deep breaths, ate some healthy food, and had a warm shower and things un-shrunk a bit. Still feeling anxious as hell like something’s not quite right.

I’ll go back to posting 1x a week here to update on progress, and go 1x a month after 4 weeks. I think the less time spent on this board the better for now - seems to raise stress levels and cause a negative feedback loop. From the last few days it seems I do better the less focused I am on this and the more I stay relaxed and try to live a normal, happy life and laugh once in a while.

Thanks for following my story.

#15

I know what you mean about feeling like something isn’t right - that deep anxiety in your chest and gut that you can’t seem to shake. I know because I get it too sometimes and then realize shortly after Im stressing myself out from reading all these stories. I’m almost certain thats your mind playing tricks on you. If a crash were to happen, I imagine it will hit you all at once - one commonality and reocurring theme I often see people describe is feeling intense fatigue and loss in libido, and your penis going numb shortly after you wake up.

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#16

Hi-

Quick update from me for anyone following my story.

Lots of ups and downs. Felt better overall the last few days - was able to get it up, masturbate (had watery semen which I didn’t on the drug), and even have sexual thoughts as recently as 2 days ago. Noticed my erection is to the right and a bit tilted, worrying sign of Peyronie’s.

I think I’ve gotten worse the last 2 days however. Feel significantly less libido and not sure I could get it up if I tried…

Not yet felt a crash of any sort but feeling as if I have less feeling in my penis today. Noticing an hour Glass shape when coming out of the ocean today, very nervous. Could be mental but I’m fairly certain I have Peyronie’s.

Noticing size wise I have some nocturnal erections at night, wake up full, and then testicles and penis retract between 10-2 pm. The last few days this was alleviated by a warm shower and a nap but less so today.

Penis is currently cold even after a warm shower. Extremely worried as a result. Not sure if the ocean swim today may be a culprit. Will keep thread updated in case this ever helps future PFS sufferers.

#17

Agarman

I honestly think you’re okay buddy, don’t stress out too much. Give it time before you start to assume the worst. The fact that you can masturbate successfully and are having nocturnal erections is a promising sign. You are likely having lingering side effects which will subside.

As for losing feeling, does it still feel that way? Make sure you’re not excessively tugging just for the sake of making sure it works

#18

Just started today. Getting that rubbery, numb feel people talk about. Scary stuff. I’ll keep you posted - thanks so much for being willing to talk and glad you’re doing better

#19

You really shouldn’t take zinc or any other hormone changing drugs.

#20

How are you doing LBV? Any change in your side effects?

#21

I think you meant @agarman?

#22

Hi there.

Thanks for checking in all! I’ve been back and forth - not very consistent at all.

I thought I was crashing a few days ago when I was cold and numb, but bounced back the next day to one of my best days ever (Sunday - Tuesday). I took some L-Arginine and it seemed to help with circulation at those low points.

Yesterday night I noticed I got cold and shrunken again… super discouraging. Cannot downplay the mental side for me at least - I have a tendency to spiral and think that I’m crashing and will never recover ever. I went to bed, got some crappy sleep (thanks stress) but woke up to very hard nocturnal erections. I have been having those fairly consistently through all of this - but funnily can’t remember if I did or not prior to fin. Think it’s all a good sign.

Looking to dial in my diet more over the next few weeks. Trying to stay optimistic and off of these forums a bit more tbh - puts me in a bad mental place. Really like the support and connecting with others here though.

I’ll keep this updated as I go. Thanks again all.

Edit: Forgot to mention. I noticed increased urinary leakage after peeing yesterday with my cold/shrunken episode. Noticed that since I got off fin actually… prostate or muscle related? I’m also looking to dial in my diet more tightly over the coming weeks and also am seeing a pelvic floor PT specialist next week. I think part of this is muscle/PF related - from what I can tell a lot of “hard flaccid” sufferers have similar symptoms. I notice that I definitely regain size and temp fairly noticeably when sitting on a toilet or squatting down, leading me to believe it could be playing a role.

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#23

Just continuing to update here.

I’ve been back and forth - very strange how this has been progressing. Some days I’ll notice I’m cold and shrunken, and other days I’m actually mostly normal. I’ve noticed a few bouts of insomnia as well where I can’t seem to hit a deep sleep without waking up - magnesium has seemed to help with that the last several nights.

Semen has bounced between being watery and normal - most recently watery again. Can feel anxiety creep in from time to time but seems better when I’ve reduced my caffeine intake and spend less time worrying on these forums.

LIbido fairly low still - but catch glimpses of it coming back, checking out women, having sexual thoughts, etc. Still have nightly nocturnal erections from what I can tell - even had trouble going back to sleep I got such a large one (don’t remember getting them much before fin. funnily enough). Penis still has that bend and looks just weird many times, typically in morning to afternoon when testicles tend to retract… but if that’s the worst I come out with I’ll be beyond estatic.

Noticing feeling better when I reduce carbs from my diet. Been eating fairly healthy with a lot of spinach (per dolichol protocol) and nuts, meats, etc. Amazed at how much not thinking about this and focusing on the positives (thank god I only took a low dose topical!) and recovery stories here and particularly over at swole.

Been on a few good days in terms of temperature and not having hard flaccid… we’ll see if it continues. I’m continuing to keep diet dialed in, working out hard, drinking no alcohol, staying positive/occupied, and taking supplements. Arginine seemed to have a good effect on me the 3 or 4 times I’ve tried it - avoiding to not build a tolerance though. Amazingly seems that recovery stories all follow a certain pattern - crazy strong diet, healthy mindset, exercise, and some supplementation.

Fingers crossed on improvements or at least no major crash…

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#24

Hey @agarman,

I’ll need to side with Pete on this one, I think a lot of this is due to anxiety and stress. Both of these cause the body to react in certain ways, all of which is typically negative.

Some of the fine folks on this site suggested some meditation and relaxing music to ease out some of the anxiety and it has helped me tremendously. Maybe give this a try.

As for your potential Peyronies, I do not believe you have this. You would not be touching yourself as much as you have been, even with high libido. This disease causes much more anxiety because of the actual deformity in your erections. My Peyronies started while I was on Fin and immediately noticed the pain. Not everyone has pain, but a great majority do.

You should still go to a Urologist to get this checked out, if you haven’t already.

Try giving your member a couple weeks to rest (no erection checking, masturbation, etc.), you may notice some positive differences. Try to remember your body is recovering from a very extreme drug, which takes time to do, sometimes even months.

Good luck!

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#25

Any updates on your situation? Sorry to hear this has happened

#26

Hi there.

Not many major updates from me.

I think I have been trending better the last week or so. Been off for about 5 weeks now. Haven’t experienced coldness or numbness for a bit, which is all a good sign. No mental sides except a few nights of insomnia that seemed to dissapate when I took some magnesium and calmed down. Post void dribble and anxiety has calmed down.

Only thing remaining that bothers me quite a bit is occasional watery semen and daily penis/testicle changes.

I wake up with a normal sized and looking penis and testes, which almost always retract/shrink once I get up and around. Testicles stay retracted but not painful until later in the afternoon/evening when they seem to go back to normal again… Same goes for penis - has the hourglass shape appear at this time, but goes away in the later day… Taking this to mean I’m not out of the woods yet…

I think cleaning up my diet (paleo), staying positive and out of these forums, exercise, and trying to not think about all of this has helped. I’ll be continuing to avoid alcohol and bad foods over the coming months in hopes that my daily changes don’t lead to a crash or worsen. If this is all I get out with I’ll be beyond extatic.

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#27

You will recover. That’s sure. Hm, within let’s say 2-4 months. Cause your body is healing very fast. I don’t know why but if your paleo diet works for you, go on. For most ppl here instead this route unfort. hasn’t cured anybody. Hm, I ask myself why? Would you mind participating in the 23 and me project?
It would be cool to see what genetics you have and why YOU are progessing so fast and others not. Many thx!

#28

I will absolutely be participating - ordering my info this week. Same goes for contributing monthly to the foundation.

We’ll see if I keep progressing or not. Will continue to update. Much love to you all.

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#29

Glad to hear things seem to be improving

#30

Hi all -

Thought I’d check in one more time here.

Things have been going well for me since I initially posted. Pretty much 100% back to normal - and hard to tell if some of the stuff i was going through after the first few weeks was real or just mental.

I’m still having a few lingering things such as what looks like minor peronie’s (small dent) at times, and now have some blood in my semen. I’m going to a urologist to get that all checked out.

Libido is back. Anxiety is back to normal. No more shrinkage that I can tell.

Will report back in a few months with a final update. Hope everyone is improving…

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