[Week 9 Update] Still Recovering

Member Stories
#21

Hey, guys, it’s now five weeks since my crash around March 18, 2021. Nothing much has changed since the four-week mark but I had a slight setback last Tuesday night. I suffered an anxiety/panic attack just seconds after realizing my libido dropped out of nowhere. My friend and girlfriend were able to calm me down and I fell asleep, but I woke up at around 3 a.m. (an hour later) to another attack. It was pretty rough, but it only happened that night. Wednesday night I still had anxiety but it wasn’t as strong.

My physical symptoms were unaffected by the anxiety/panic attack.

I don’t completely find this to be 100% contributed from my hormonal imbalance since I didn’t sleep well in the past days for dumb reasons. My theory is that the sleep deprivation coupled with persistent minor anxiety from my physical symptoms left me vulnerable.

There’s another concern I have. Apparently, when I sleep on my side and curl-up (as my usual position), I have a weird sensation in my penis. It’s like I have a minor case of persistent genital arousal disorder (PGAD), but I’m not sure if it’s that or increased anxiety from possible muscle tension. I did some research on the Internet and through the forums and it only seems to be a unique symptom among PSSD sufferers.

#22

Hello, I’m now at the six weeks mark since my crash. Unfortunately, I had major setbacks, but also had some improvements.

No Changes/Worsening Conditions:

  • The tip of my penis head lost a lot of its hot/cold sensation. It’s still pretty sensitive to touch, which is the weirdest thing.

  • My anxiety/depression has creeped up again. This entire week has been hell; everyday is a struggle trying to maintain my anxiety levels that tend to spike around 7 pm and takes 3 hours (sometimes 5) to fall back down. I had to call the suicide hotline; most ridiculous thing I ever did – no help whatsoever.

  • Penis glans and lower-shaft/base are still quite numb, almost the same for the past six weeks.

Improvements:

  • My PGAD symptoms seem to be related to anxiety (for the most part). I don’t get this weird sensation when I’m completely calm before sleep.

  • Tried masturbating yesterday without aiming to finish (testing the waters). My sexual sensitivity is almost pre-fin state when I’m aroused despite the numbness. I did, however, ejaculate on Wednesday and it still has force – super happy about that.

  • Very slight improvement in overall sensation (both touch and temperature) on glans. I’m able to feel a little more, but it’s incredibly subtle. It may just be from less adrenaline due to stress. My lower-shaft/base can feel more change in temperature, but still numb to touch and has that rubbery feel.

I’ve decided to stop putting myself in a hole that keeps getting deeper. After talking to family/friends, I worked on a schedule for myself to follow everyday to keep my mind off of things. Finally started exercising again yesterday and I’m planning to slowly get back into it. Yesterday I just did bicep curls and arms are a bit sore today, which is a good sign based on what I’ve read. Kegel exercises will be a part of my routine since I have hard flaccid.

#23

Hi, I’ve been lurking on the forums. I have not recovered yet if anyone cares. Today marks 2 months since I experienced my crash. Just trying to avoid being on this site and only visit to check on people I’m staying connected with. Also checking for more recoveries on genital numbness. As usual, here are my conditions/improvements. Be aware these are not from the past week, these are my notes since the last post 3 weeks ago.

No Changes/Worsening Conditions:

  • Penis glans and lower-shaft/base are still quite numb (60-70%)
  • Lower-shaft skin feels like rubber, as usual for the past 2 months
  • Hard-flaccid is still a major concern
  • Burning sensation in/around urethra returned
  • Frequent urination comes and goes
  • Keep getting boogers in my nose, probably unrelated
  • Yellow stools

Improvements:

  • I regained some temperature sensation on my glans. More noticeable on the lower shaft
  • Glans has had slight improvements in sensation, but it fluctuates throughout the day. It is worse when sitting or feeling anxious/stressed… maybe pelvic floor muscles?
  • Mostly recovered from anxiety and depression

Out of everything, my most troubling symptom is just genital numbness. I would go out to say if this improves significantly or entirely returns to normal, I would mark myself as fully recovered. I’ve taken the liberty to do light exercises (40 min walks every other day) each week, eating slightly healthier, and sought professional therapy. My doctor has made an appointment to a urologist to rule out any other problems and I’ve been prescribed hydroxyzine for panic attacks. Luckily, I haven’t had the reason to take it for 3 weeks now since my mental health has improved. I’m planning to donate to PFSFoundation soon because as a growing professional, funding is the most important part of the research.

#24

Short update. Something oddly happened overnight yesterday. So, apparently, I did have muscle wastage around my arms and I didn’t bother to care because I was more concerned about the penile paresthesia. I was assuming I did since my biceps weren’t as big as they were and I kept blaming my lack of activity. Yesterday after waking up, I noticed my biceps were much larger than they were the day before. I did not do weights for couple weeks and even when I did weights, it was just a 10-minute workout for only 2 days; I doubt it’s muscle hypertrophy. They look about the same in size as they did months ago before I crashed.

#25

Hello,

This is the month I’ve been dreading to write about as it is my third month still on this forum. Today marks 3 months since my crash and according to the PFS Foundation, it is now considered a persistent/chronic condition. Honestly, I’ve been anticipating this for a while considering the incredibly static to minute improvements in my most bothersome symptom, genital anesthesia. I will list my initial conditions I had at the beginning as well as what has improved/worsened to this point.

Initial Crash Symptoms (3/18/21):

  • Burning sensation in/around urethra
  • Severe loss of sensation on glans and base of penis
  • Loss of libido
  • Erectile dysfunction
  • Muscle wastage around arms
  • Watery semen
  • Slightly low semen volume
  • Moderate sexual anhedonia
  • Moderate general anhedonia
  • Severe anxiety
  • Severe depression
  • Suicidal ideation/thoughts
  • Hard flaccid
  • Involuntary genital arousal

Newly Developed Symptoms:

  • Frequent urination
  • Yellow and narrow stools
  • Stomach pains
  • Stomach gas
  • Constipation

Current Symptoms (as of 6/18/2021):

  • Mild/moderate loss of sensation on glans and base of penis
  • On/off frequent urination
  • Hard flaccid that comes and goes
  • Constipation and irregular stools

I have improved significantly as you see since three months ago. However, I am not fully recovered yet as I still suffer from numbness in my genitals. They haven’t bothered me as much as they have at the beginning, but I’m still holding out that I will continue to get better. My visit with the urologist was a waste of time; his response after our 5-minute appointment (pissed me off) was that he couldn’t help me and it’s likely to be permanent or improve gradually over time due to the hormone effects of Finasteride. He also told me food cannot worsen my conditions, so I guess that’s a positive.

I’m currently trying to shift my focus over to my space career rather than put all my energy into my condition, so my goal will be to be less active on this forum from now on. However, for everyone who’s kept up with me so far and/or has messaged me personally, I will keep in touch with you. I’ll continue to post my condition as time progresses (hopefully for the better).

Personally want to thank @Pete1989, @roy1, @LazarusRy, @finaduta, @Casual, and @M_C for helping me through my tough times. I did not personally talk with all of you, but your posts and comments have done more for me than anyone/anything else. Thank you and I love you guys! I’ll be sure to think of you guys when I walk on Mars (if only, haha)!

2 Likes
#26

Bruce

Im happy to hear your report of better health. I may not actively post on this forum anymore, but as always if you ever want to talk I’m available via DM. Stay positive!

1 Like
#27

He doesn’t understand what is wrong with you so he is in no position to make that claim.

1 Like
#28

That may be true but he also knows tremendously more about the sexual organ system than most people. Although I am still cautious of what I eat, I trust his judgment in that general food (and not supplements) cannot worsen my problem. The only food item that I’ve been mostly staying away from is soy; I still consume it but in far less proportions.

#29

Man, don’t fuck your recovery.

1 Like
#30

It’s not like I’m going to eat a boat load of sugar and grease, haha. My diet has been pretty clean for over several years. I haven’t actually changed my diet at all other than less soy products. I’m also staying away from all supplements unless it’s absolutely necessary, and even then I would only consider taking magnesium.

#31

Keep heart. My numbness lasted for ~7 months and then suddenly it went away.

Your worry is understandable, but try to give it even more time (even though 3 months feels like a long time already).

It’s hard to say exactly when it started happening, but the morning wood came back a few months before the libido or sensation or being able to get an erection out of arousal.

Advice (aside from mere patience) is hard to give because of how ambiguous this condition still is. but I’m of the opinion that blood flow to the area helps with healing. So maybe try to warm your genital area up daily or massage, etc.

I wonder if maybe the hormonal receptors in our brain get blocked/switched off for much longer than doctors think happens. So our body naturally clears away the blockages but it takes time. And then once those final blockages start to dissapear, things start to seem normal again.

Admittedly throwing shit against a wall. But that’s what we’re stuck with. Look on the bright side: at least a bunch of pharma executuves at Merck are getting filthy rich /s.

1 Like
#32

I’m contemplating on trying the three-piece Nioxin system to promote hair growth. I’m afraid of using more chemicals but I’ve read that it’s just shampoo/conditioner and isn’t absorbed into serum. Any thoughts?

#33

Don’t-fuck-your-recovery.

1 Like
#34

@Bruce are you mad wanting another dance with the devil. Look what repeated use of inhibitors has done to me.

#35

Okay… Well I was hoping for non-biased responses. I’ve read every discussion thread about Nioxin on this forum and not one has mentioned it being an anti-androgen. I’m definitely not going to try Minoxidil again that’s for sure, but I’m not entirely convinced that Nioxin is dangerous. I’ll do more research before I make a decision, but I will also keep in mind of your comments.

1 Like
#36

Our input is with the best of intentions only

#37

Just got results from my doctor to check prolactin and testosterone levels. My testosterone results from March are also provided as a comparison.

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#38

Hello,

I am past the 5 month mark. I promised to not visit the website often, which has been the case. I would like to say that I’m still experiencing penile numbness and have recently started to suffer from weak ejaculations.

Funny enough, I didn’t experience strong ejaculations many times in the past, it was often rare and heavily depended on arousal. The strongest ejaculation I have ever had was 3 months post-Finasteride after receiving amazing head. It was only recently, about 3+ weeks ago that my ejaculation force has reduced to dribbling (which is uncommon, I usually have some force regardless). I’m not overly concerned about it and believe it’ll go away at some point.

In terms of my long-term symptom of numbness, the glans has more or less improved enough where it’s basically back to normal. I can feel it a lot more now than in the past months, but it still fluctuates in sensitivity from time to time.

The lower-shaft and base are still quite numb, probably a 80-90% loss in sensitivity, honestly no improvements here. I’m able to feel cold but touch is nearly non-existent (just feels like rubber).

The most sensitive area of the penis is also becoming more numb. I’m not sure if this is Finasteride related or death grip syndrome at this point. I haven’t abstained for months, which may be a factor in not seeing improvements there if it was DGS.

I’ve tried getting an appointment with an endocrinologist, but they won’t take me in without an official medical diagnosis.

1 Like
#39

Numb penis is a medical diagnosis. Might get to see a uro rather than an endo though.

#40

Urologist told me nothing can be done. Improvements are possible but gradual. Permanent numbness is also a possibility but he isn’t sure what the outcome is. My other doctors are confident it’ll improve over time but no idea about the timeline.